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horn_of_plenty - Friday Oct 01, 2010
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 137.0

total ended up being around 5500 today.

breakfast; 600

lunch: 550

snack: 100

horrible binge: sandwich 400, vegetables stir fry 100, 2 more big pitas 520 just for that, tons of ice cream 1050 or so, plus more ice cream 300, apple 100, peanut butter 500, jelly 100?, some bran 50, am i forgetting anything!? around 3200 or so.

i just don't know. i guess i'm not really giving myself a fair shot in life or reality or really anything.

so, i have had two binges  this week...and it should take at least a week or so to even out all these extra calories. of course, the endless sugar and fat are already wreaking havic on my insides, too bad i don't even care.


Progress as of today: 3 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

moogy on 10/01/2010:
I am sorry you have had such a bad day HOP, I wish we could figure out why you need to binge. In the meantime, I am sending love and hopes that tomorrow will be a better day.:)

breakaway on 10/02/2010:
So sorry you had another bad day :( Sometimes we just aren't ready to diet and try making ourslelves and it jsut doens't work (been there several times). Hang in there! If you want this bad enough it will happen for you. Stay strong :D

horn_of_plenty - Thursday Sep 30, 2010
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 137.0

Good Morning!

Breakfast: 400: an egg/oatmeal soufflee, greek yogurt, syrup and cinnamon, small apple.

lunch/snack: 300

snack: 400

dinner: 2 english muffins 240, tofu 100, bran 20, stir fry 100: 460

total: 1560 = excellent.

exercise: weights/cardio i think at the gym...

Progress as of today: 3 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

loveray on 09/30/2010:
egg/oatmeal souffle!!!! do share the recipe! xo

moogy on 09/30/2010:
Good morning HOP, I hope you have a wonderful day of staying in control. I know you can, believe in yourself. Hugs.

V on 09/30/2010:
Excellent indeed :) I am proud :) :) :)

moogy on 09/30/2010:
Well done, it was a good day. One of the excellent ones, you are quite right:)))

horn_of_plenty - Wednesday Sep 29, 2010
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 137.0

Thanks for showing my love and concern. I think this is what I appreciate most about this site: honest advice and a commitment to help each other work toward our life and dieting goals. 

stir fry came out so-so. i must start cooking better! ... i am new to the world of cooking. also, i am now heading off to the kitchen to a cook an easy recipe i did once before (with success!) for collard greens...but i will make sure to use EXTRA olive oil bc last time it needed a bit more for taste/texture/crisp.

Breakfast: large peach 100, oatmeal w. almond milk 200, plain greek yogurt w. sf syrup 140: 440 (i've been drinking and eating too much sugar free stuff which is what could be spiking my desire to binge.)

Lunch: some of the stir fry cabbage i just cooked, with carrots, onion, scallions, garlic, ginger, peanut oil, stir fry sauce, hoison sauce, sf syrup just a little, a little sweet and low, shirtaki noodles but not the angel hair (for now on i will only buy the really thin noodles, the others don't cook up so well).   I also had some grapes and a bag of 100 calorie popcorn. i didn't eat all the stir fry. perhaps 440 for all of what i ate.

900 approx.

snack: sandwich 200

snacking/bingeing: 5 dried apricots 150, nuts 200, ice cream 1050, noodle soup 100, pb and jelly on bran 500, regular fruit yogurts 240: 1240 blah! i feel like i'm forgetting something that i ate!

total so far: 2340...this actually seems low...what did i forget? I'm not mad at myself, i made this decision to binge. and i will not lose weight because of it. this is why i can't seem to lose weight. i constantly take off the same 1-2 pounds!

dinner: collard greens and apples: 400

snack: apple 100


exercise 1.5 hour walk.


Progress as of today: 3 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

KathyBlue on 09/29/2010:
ok, your lunch menu breaks my heart, I want to eat those toooooooooooooo!!!!

loveray on 09/29/2010:
you are so amazing and wonderful. i hope that you can see that and love yourself as much as i love you! you have such a warm spirit and i know that being alone is difficult, but im glad that you are opening yourself up to self exploration. i know, seth is a wonderful man - if we can work through the issues that we are committing to working through, i think this could be it! i really couldnt have found a more appropriate match - and someone who is willing to go to therapy and wants to work hard to make this work is who i want to be with. thank you for your encouragement. most of my family and close friends here have been skeptical just because it didnt work out in july and didnt want to see me hurt. its hard for people to rationalize why people make decisions the way they do. i hope you have a wonderful evening! xoxo

moogy on 09/29/2010:
Hey, you are not putting any weight one either. Just imagine if you weren't coming here each day and logging in your food with us. I bet you would not be keeping yourself under control. You are so close to your goal that your main effort is really not losing the 3 remaining pounds, you real focus needs to be on finding out why you have this urge to binge. It seems to be with you all the time in the back of your mind. You are wanting to feed something, do you know what it is? I know with me it is an emptiness that I feel from my childhood plus some more complicated stuff. I feed myself so that I don't feel the emptiness. Knowing why helps me to control it - logically I know that the food will only comfort me for a little while and then I will feel worse. It helps. Have a good day HOP.

V on 09/29/2010:
I just read your post on my page....I have to say that knowing what your weakness is well it is half your battle...I also think that starting to cook is a marvelous idea! I have a great recipe for collards...Sautee onions, green peppers in a medium pot, spray with Pam for super low cal, cook for 5 mins, add i small can of ff low sod chicken broth, bring to a boil..add collards a few at a time til all are saturated, bring to a boil, stir again, reduce heat to medium and cook for 20 minutes....i feel you will get this together and if not is it possible for you to be happy at your current weight and have a routine workout plan????? I have seen your pics and honestly i don't think you are overweight, but that is just my opinion just giving you my thoughts :) Have a good evening!

Sofia on 09/29/2010:
I also can be a binge eater, I know how hard it is to stop. At least you're actively trying to control yourself. Hope tomorrow goes better :)

just42day on 09/30/2010:
1.5 hour of exercise is great! I'm sure if you continue w/that and control portions the best you can, you will see and feel a difference very soon! You CAN do it! :)

horn_of_plenty - Tuesday Sep 28, 2010
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 137.0

exercise: 1 hour of hard elliptical and some abs exercise.

I was up until 6:20 am...practically read the whole 300 page book in one sitting...My goal is to make today a 2200-2300 calorie day. I will mostly have coffee for the rest of the day...because of the mini ice cream attack i just decided to partake in.

snack: 2 fruits 200

breakfast: fruit and popcorn 300

snack: popcorn, tofu, veggies: 300

lunch: sandwich, apple, ice cream: 900.

(tsf: 1700...thank gosh there are NO COOKIES around, because i just tried to find them and the chocolate. whew.)

after gym: chips (just the rest of the crumbs) and turkey breast: around 120

1820...maybe more like 1850

snacks: 2 decaf hot coffees 100

late dinner: eggwhite on biscuit 300, bran 50: 350

total: 2300. alright.


Progress as of today: 3 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

thinnside40 on 09/28/2010:
YOur going to have a wonderful day....you are!

lose4sure on 09/28/2010:
opps...the dreaded ice cream attack! Good luck in your day...

V on 09/28/2010:
Yikes HOP??? What is going on? i am out and about right now but you can send a message via fb if you need to talk okay,I will be home later so until then leave the house for a little bit if you feel you can't stop

hollybelle on 09/28/2010:
OK - I scanned your last several entries and couldn't figure out what book kept you up all night? I can't put a book down sometimes - but not until 6:30 a.m.!! I would fall sleep I think! Hang in there this will pass.....

moogy on 09/28/2010:
It is a good plan for you to ease yourself back into the dieting calorie number. Moving down slowly will not cause you to get a bit panicky. You just do what you know works for you. Love you HOP.

Donkey on 09/28/2010:
Just do the best that you can do at the moment. :-)

horn_of_plenty - Monday Sep 27, 2010
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 137.0

Day ends at about 4050 calories. could be worse. but, i am sorta ashamed at myself...because this didn't have to happen. i could have slept the day away and it would have been better than eating like this...

but it's done. and tomorrow will be a good one. And I will once again not binge for a long, long time...because this is important for me to stop.

eggplant chips did NOT come out very well. they needed to cook MORE and have LESS seasonings...

I binged today...first time since september 3rd. No good reason, but i was feeling EXTREMELY lethargic today and yesterday. not a good reason to binge, but this is usually how i feel before i do.

I want to try and cook eggplant chips today...looking for a recipe...and also I bought ANOTHER cabbage to cook with carrots...

Breakfast: Grapes 50, yogurt 110, oatmeal and almond milk 210: 370 :-)

binging....3,000 calories almost exactly...

Snack: 2 cookies 260, milk 50, popcorn 100: 410



exercise: one hour of elliptical. it was difficult with such a full stomach!

Progress as of today: 3 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

skinnygrlwithin on 09/27/2010:
No you're right any weight loss is progress... and I know I can't be super restrictive forever...but I've been in this spot once before... almost at the same weight (I tend to get chubby during super super stressful times in my life...and this is time #3)... and I was able to lose almost 20 pounds in a little over 2 months... when I put my mind to something... really have a goal and depend on myself to reach it I have really good will power. So once I reach my goal weight I will allow myself to be normal again and not so crazy (because I naturally am tiny)... but until than I just have to do this.

getmebackto150 on 09/27/2010:
ooh let me know how the eggplant chips come out... That sounds like somthing I would totally be into!!!

V on 09/27/2010:
Naw but i am there so much I might as well work there! LOL....Thank you for the love! I am lots better today :) It really hit me hard, I wasn't expecting that!

cristianao on 09/27/2010:
this weather has not gotten any better.. i guess gym it is!!

CoverGirl on 09/27/2010:
(: thank you for caring, and Im going to try n not starve myself

KathyBlue on 09/27/2010:
LOL, for us Seitan is a piece of bread... it has looots of protein (wheat gluten) : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wheat_gluten_%28food%29

KathyBlue on 09/27/2010:
as they say: "A 3 1/2 ounce (100 gram) serving contains 118 calories, 18% protein and less than 1% unsaturated fat. The same amount of beef has 207 calories and 32.2% protein and is high in saturated fats."

just42day on 09/27/2010:
Yes, the tuna salad is really good. Love the sweetness of the carrots and peas. A crunch (carrot) and pop (pea) in every bite! :)

legcramps on 09/27/2010:
ooo, eggplant chips - sounds interesting!

tangalyn on 09/27/2010:
ur food sounds good too (i think lol) havent really ever had eggplant :) but does sound good.. hope u have a great day!!

sweetpea1977 on 09/27/2010:
Hey HOP! Thanks for the well wishes!

It looks like you've been doing really well lately. Way to goo!

Mmm, eggplant chips! Sounds yummy. Hope you find a good recipe!

loveray on 09/27/2010:
im so sorry love. i hope you have a better evening. try to breathe and know we all slip up. keep up the progress. one day will not slow your efforts. you can do it!! xoxo

selina on 09/27/2010:
Hi Hop! No, you never told me about your artist friend... does she have a website? I'd love to see her work...

So sorry to hear about your binge... but you know what, you have veen doing so well since sep 3rd, so you can pick yourself up right now and start anew without missing a beat. Have a great day, Hop, and take a rest if you feel tired.

hollybelle on 09/27/2010:
Checking in with you - I hear you about lethargy! I had been feeling that way for MONTHS and couldn't figure it out - usually activity is the solution - but wasn't cutting it for me for seveeral months - but the last 1-2 weeks that seems to be lifting and I have that old "antsy" feeling again. Hang in there and keep at it and it'll happen is all I can say!

moogy on 09/27/2010:
Sorry that you had a back step HOP, but you know this binge wasn't as bad as some that you have had, so maybe you are slowly improving even that area of your life. Anyway, today is a new day and you know now that you can overcome these setbacks. So onward and downward, no recriminations of feeling sorry, just moving on from here.

Umpqua on 09/27/2010:
I have tried a bunch of times to crisp up eggplant, with no success. If you figure out the right temp/prep combo please let me know, I'd love to make crisps or fries!

breakaway on 09/27/2010:
Well, for a first binge since Sept 3 that is not bad at all. You were doing very good and you will again after today :D Just keep your head up! Your always there for so many of us and your a great inspiration...binges or NO binges! Hang in there!

V on 09/27/2010:
:( You were doing so good and I know how hard it has been for you! keep your head up HOP! I know for you it will be back to buisness :) stop sabotaging yourself, you only have 2 more to go til your mini goal...You have this!

V on 09/28/2010:
Ooh i was just mentioning to umpqua that maybe dip the egg plant in a egg white wash and coat them with either fiber one cereal before cooking,

horn_of_plenty - Sunday Sep 26, 2010
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 137.0

6:30am early snack: 2 apples 180

10am Breakfast: oatmeal and almond milk 200, yogurt w. cinnamon and sf maple syrup: 120: 320 :-) Perfecto.

500 = pretty darn nice if i say so myself :-)




Dinner: huge, but all veggies, fruits, tofu: around 500

Snack: ended up eating after dinner, around 300.

total 1950-2000.

EXERCISE: will be at the gym, will bring snacks, will be there a long time...for weights and cardio....  :-)


Progress as of today: 3 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

V on 09/26/2010:
Breakfast sounds yummers :P Have a great workout :)

moogy on 09/26/2010:
It does sound like a delicious start to the day, have a good time at the gym, good idea to take snacks. I hope you finish you day really well HOP.

teensybikini on 09/26/2010:
Short sweet and to the point. Nice enrty. keep up the great work. Hope your workout went well!

horn_of_plenty - Saturday Sep 25, 2010
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 137.0

Breakfast: grapes 40, oatmeal and almond milk 200, yogurt 110: 350 great.

 Lunch w. grandma...

snack: bran w. almond milk

dinner: 1/2 quesadilla at fridays, 2 salsa side dishes w. lettuce, too much diet coke!  hmmm, maybe like 900?

late snack: bran and almond milk 100

1950...overall, AWESOME! i LOVE that i didn't finish my quesadilla! :-) and it was good...well, it was a bit soggy, but still it was a quesadilla!

exercise: NONE. rest day!

Progress as of today: 3 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

moogy on 09/25/2010:
Yesterday was a good day HOP, I hope you have a good enjoyable healthy weekend. You are doing really well. I am proud of you.

just42day on 09/25/2010:
Within 1 lb of your goal! I'm so excited for you :)

horn_of_plenty - Friday Sep 24, 2010
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 136.0

Wow, did another week just pass by!?

Late Breakfast: big apple 100, oatmeal and almond milk 200, yogurt and dark chocolate ovaltine 120: 420. good.

yogurt 130, bar, banana....850 total

Snack/Lunch, depending: 550, 20.

dinner: tofu 200, 150, apple 100, apple 100: 550

total: 2010

gym weights and walking.

Progress as of today: 4 lbs lost so far, only 1 lbs to go!

hollybelle on 09/24/2010:
This week has really passsed quickly for me, too. Have a great weekend!

moogy on 09/24/2010:
Yes, life is whizzing by, another week closer to your goal, maybe this week is the week. What do you think HOP?

V on 09/24/2010:
Yes the week did seem to zip right by :) Have a good evening!!! I think this totally might be the week to meet your goal :)

tangalyn on 09/25/2010:
yep.,. time just flyin by, seems to go faster every week... hope u have a great day! :)

horn_of_plenty - Thursday Sep 23, 2010
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 136.0

breakfast: apple 100, rest of cooked cabbage and tofu 300, 2 servings pretzels 220: 620.

went to bed REALLY late, around 2:15. I was finishing reading a book,"Lucia, Lucia."  It's on the NY Times list and it was fabulous.

lunch: nectarine 100 big, cereal and milk 200, yogurt 150, more yogurt 160, popcorn too much fake butter 300, ice cream 400: 1310

tsf: 1930...blah.

snack: lots of fruit 220

total 2150.

snack: coffees 150

snack: bar, apple, diet soda: 260

total around 2560. ok. not great, not terrible by any means.

no exercise.

day off!


Progress as of today: 4 lbs lost so far, only 1 lbs to go!

loveray on 09/23/2010:
i have been wanting to read that book! maybe ill check it out. xoxo

hollybelle on 09/23/2010:
My friend gave me that book and I want to read it. I have too many going now - but someday.....good to know you liked it. I have recently read The Help - it was wonderful, but I'm not sure a younger person would "get" it as much as someone of my generation. My book club is reading the Steig Larsson triology: The Girl with the Dragon Tatoo, The Girl Who Played With Fire and The Girl who Kicked the Hornet's Nest. So far we've only on the first one.....

moogy on 09/23/2010:
It is hard to put a rivitting book down, I have read a few of those myself, just have to get to the end. Then wish there was a series. I bet you will enjoy your sleep tonight. have a good day HOP

V on 09/23/2010:
Totally want to get that book now! thanks for the heads up :) Are you off today?

horn_of_plenty - Wednesday Sep 22, 2010
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 136.0

i still consider friday, sept 3,  my last binge. so, today is the 22nd...that is 19 days of no binging, almost 3 weeks. yay.

IPOD success at the park! haha :-)

For the first time in over a year, i'm trying to charge my IPOD! (battery sometimes plays tricks on me...)yay, i can't wait to use it...especially at the park so this creepy guy doesn't bother me again! haha. usually, i walk and workout in silence...but i miss my music...and i want to download some new tunes!

Very hungry for carbs this morning. It kinda makes sense, though,because i had a lot of protein bars and artificial sugar yesterday.

Breakfast: large peach 100, oatmeal and almond milk 200, some leftover scrambled egg white 40, pretzels 110, yogurt w. ovaltine chocolate 130: 580. good. I was more hungry than usual.  oh, energy drink, too. 600

lunch: banana on wheat, greek yogurt w. some sf syrup and chocolate powder: 360 ok.

snack: yummy cooked cabbage w. mushrooms and tofu, spicy, with black pepper, salt, stirfry sauce, onion, garlic, peanut oil. 300?

snack: apple 100

dinner: protein bar 130, apple, peach (all kinda big) total 330

snack after gym: luna bar which didn't satisfy 180...so i did end up having more tofu and cabbage from what i made earlier. wow, it was a lot...and i have more for tomorrow! 320 more for a total of 500.

total: 2150...not good for weightloss, but otherwise it is a fine total. :-)

Progress as of today: 4 lbs lost so far, only 1 lbs to go!

KathyBlue on 09/22/2010:
cabbage sounds yummmmy :)

loveray on 09/22/2010:
me too!! i ate one of those atkins protein bars yesterday, and it made my tummy yucky...cutting down on the artificial sweeteners today. xo

hollybelle on 09/22/2010:
Protein bars used to help me, but I have noticed they make me feel "weird" lately.

hollybelle on 09/22/2010:
And don't get me started on fake sugar - I can't give it up - but I'm considering working on it!

V on 09/22/2010:
Just make sure your ipod doesn't distract you to the point that your guard is down,Make sure creepy guy is in site at all times :)Have a good day!

KathyBlue on 09/22/2010:
Portuguese? LOL... Strange, Portuguese normally speak English :P. At least during my first year in Portugal I could get on well with people speaking English... then I learned Portuguese, yeah... I'm Hungarian, eheh. Don't worry, I think Portuguese guys love really white girls, if you're blond, white skin, you have the power upon him, lol! :)

Umpqua on 09/22/2010:
I hope you have a great day and enjoy your ipod!

loveray on 09/22/2010:
that cabbage stir fry sounds awesome!! yum.

V on 09/22/2010:
I wish, just a passion for fashion :) if you want to see the show, go to my fb page where you will find the link :) i hope you enjoy it as much as i did...

moogy on 09/22/2010:
Hey, the main thing is that you are feeling good. A few day of lower calories and a couple of higher and you will still be heading in the right direction. You are doing really well.

lose4sure on 09/22/2010:
I find that hungry for carb thing a challenge for me. If I can get over that hump I'll look forward to my 19 days of no binging!

moogy on 09/22/2010:
Nearly three weeks is absolutely worth celebrating, you are doing so well, I am really pleased for you and proud of you. Well done!!!

KathyBlue on 09/23/2010:
ok, brown, white skin does work also! I'm brown, white skin and already own a Portuguese guy, LOLOLOL.... :)

breakaway on 09/23/2010:
Wow great job! And glad you got your ipod to work at the park :D

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