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view horn_of_plenty bio page
horn_of_plenty - Tuesday Jan 13, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 137.0

i cannot sleep and doubt i'll be going to yoga on Wednesday. none of this is good.

BINGE: partially not sure why but it doesn't matter. 4 servings chips 600: , 2 servings crackers: 260, ice cream: 240

total: 2680.  i might have more. cookies...3800...pint of ice cream...4800...i feel really, really sick.


BREAKFAST: large snickers marathon bar. i wanted something bigger since i was going to be on my feet most of the day. 300

SNACK: cellnique 85

LUNCH: hot pretzel, mustard, ketchup, decaf coffee...around 420

SNACK: balance bar (which i bought bc it doesn't have fiber because i'm sick of being bloated during yoga!)

dinner: BIG. big grapefruit 120, lean cuisine 230, cucumbers 60, 2 rice cakes 80, yogurt 90. total: 580 which is just fine.

total: around 1580. happy with this. active day at school/work and then yoga. yoga wasn't that great especially my performance at the start of class. but it WAS necessary i went. i want to treat my yoga practice like brushing teeth - a necessary everyday activity.


Progress as of today: -12 lbs lost so far, only 22 lbs to go!

mama_nurse on 01/13/2009:
Tomorrow is a new day:) Good luck, keep up the good work

thinnside40 on 01/13/2009:
Oh sweetie!...No words said will make you feel better I know.... Just know that you are continually in my thoughts and prayers...WE all struggle with whatever troubles there are lurking and deal with them differently......

Better days ahead!

WI3 on 01/13/2009:
HANG IN THERE!!! Only a little bit further to go....

loveray on 01/13/2009:
oh no, im sorry for the bingey ness, but you prob didnt even make a dent with all that yoga. most important: let whatever come up that may come up for you about why that happened and work through it- back on track with eating tomorrow!! xoxo

selina on 01/13/2009:
hang in the HoP, tomorrow will be better. Warm hugs to you!

selina on 01/13/2009:
i mean, hang in there!

panda22 on 01/14/2009:
***HUGS*** sorry you had a rough time last night...Just know that today is another day, and you can get right back on track! You can do it HOP! Stay strong!

I have the same problem with binging and it's a huge battle in my life as well. It sucks because there really is no cure for it, but keep fighting! We are all here for you!!

skinnyjeans on 01/14/2009:
Today is a new day! You've been doing great lately, I'm sure you can get right back on track. :)

Maria* on 01/14/2009:
Hope that you're feeling better today.

mcwoo40 on 01/14/2009:
Stay strong HOP,i felt like jackin it all in yesterday i just had that urge to binge.What i did was to boil the kettle and have a hot blackcurrant and it seemed to do the trick.Hope you have a healthy day,Julie

horn_of_plenty - Monday Jan 12, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 137.0

if i keep this up, i BETTER see a loss! soon, i'm going to not believe the calories on these cellnique drinks...as well as a few other packaged foods. because i really should have lost weight by now...but i also am not doing cardio, only hot yoga. so, well see...and we'll see if i have to change up my routine. however, i'm not giving up or changing anything yet.  because i know i burn a lot in yoga and the weight is just "weighting" to come off!

wow! i was CRAVING central today. whew. glad most of the day is done.  and such BORING stuff today in class so it was hard to remain focussed and ignore the signals of my body all day.  i felt like i was going through a detox from all the mounds of food i was eating all weekend.  not a lot of calories, but lots of actual food consumed despite. so today was a break for my body but not my mind!

breakfast later at school 8am: apple, protein/green drink: 170

10am snack: drink 90

noon lunch light: soy chips, coffee w. lot of milk 290  i think the coffee left me shakey. so, i guess i need to watch caffeine when i eat so light. didn't realize the chips wouldn't just soak it up.

4pm SNACK: SO HUNGRY. marathon bar w. lots of protein/fiber 290

dinner 7:30pm: microwavable meal, 100 cal worth of veggies. total: 450 which is good. blah...and 2 mini apricots 50

total: 1350 yay! except for the part about still not really losing anything! i think i have gained muscle from my yoga practice. i can feel it! :)

so much love right  now.

yoga today for sure.

Progress as of today: -12 lbs lost so far, only 22 lbs to go!

thinnside40 on 01/12/2009:
Great Job.... Positive thinking too!!!!!!

panda22 on 01/12/2009:
Awesome job! Do you eat the Snicker's marathon bars?? I eat those, and I was just wondering since that's the only kind I've heard of lol

Have a great evening!

thinnside40 on 01/12/2009:
I hope some of that love is for yourself too...... Have a good night's sleep, so you can have a good day tomorrow!

Maria* on 01/12/2009:
SPECTACULAR!!! You did extra good on the cals! (but I didn't...)

Sometimes caffeine can surely make a person jittery!!!

Hope you have a wonderful evening! Love, Maria

Justine6Robert3 on 01/12/2009:
Amazing job keeping your calories in check.....and avoiding those cravings! I have no idea what a "cellnique" drink is, I'll have to look that one up. Keep it up HOP, your doing fantastic! I'm sure your body will respond soon with some weight loss :0)

WI3 on 01/12/2009:

glad to see you going strong. I can't drink a lot of caffeine if I eat light, does the same thing! Keep up the great work!

loveray on 01/13/2009:
gaining muscle can be frustrating, but think about what wonders you are doing for your body...this is true self love! if you can see how much health you are adding and how much sickness you are taking away the pounds and sizes start to not matter as much. i love you and wish you all the best, always. oh yes- silence is my only tool in working through the need to binge...meditation every day i have found, is not a choice for me- it's a necessity. xo

mcwoo40 on 01/13/2009:
Hiya,I'm glad you enjoy reading my entries.Where i come from we say 'tea'and around London they normally say 'Dinner'.I would say dinner/lunch for my meal @ 12ish.Anyway you have a healthy day,Julie

skinnyjeans on 01/13/2009:
Just stick to your plan and the weight WILL come off! :) You did fantastic yesterday.

Maria* on 01/13/2009:
Hope you're having a nice day!

petaldew on 01/13/2009:
Keep up the good work!

horn_of_plenty - Sunday Jan 11, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 137.0

MONDAY MORNING QUICK EDIT: well, well. i weigh myself fully intending to see 135...but NO! it's still high up there around 137-138! what's up with that!?? i ate dinner EARLY and weighed on an empty stomach (although i do have some waste in my system still.) darn. i know the lower numbers will come, so i'm not worried...just antsy for them to come already!



what i learned about sunday mornings: get my ass to the gym or yoga no matter how bad i feel. don't eat a big breakfast which prevents me from going to the gym.

i weiged myself in clothing and thought it would be below 135. but not so much - scale said 137. eesh. i'm not upset and i hope to have a big loss by Friday.

feeling sooo snacky today. probably because of all the yoga yesterday.

breakfast: bran crackers eaten like cereal, milk: 230, tea

Snack: huge grapefruit, cellnique 220

lunch: canned salmon w. bbq sauce, a redpepper.  yogurt after 240

binge right after lunch: 5 slices cinnamon rasin bread 440

 snack at grandma's: 2 red peppers: 80

dinner: large more than a pint serving of sauteed collard greens (i think around 230?)that i bought the other day from a health food store with fried tofu (i know this was 200, package said so)...and, naughty me, a low carb energy drink 20 bc i gave into temptation on the way home. total: around 450 but i could be off on the sauteed greens. i hope not!

total cal today: amazingly 1660 approx. calories. i didn't give in at the end and this is a pretty good amount if i say so myself. of course, i'm really unsure on the sauteed greens i had at dinner (HUGE portion) but at least it was healthy.

i am just happy i didn't ruin the day. boy would that be unfortunate.  i cannot ruin it this time around. this is my last shot before the spring, before my friend's wedding, and for me.  i MUST lose weight this time. meaning, by the end of this month, I BETTER be below 130.  i must do it for myself. i will not live in this fat body ANY LONGER. i will NOT!

Progress as of today: -12 lbs lost so far, only 22 lbs to go!

hopinforachange on 01/11/2009:
Have a good day today. Don't worry you will see that big loss that you want!

grumpy on 01/11/2009:
Can't you get out of the house and go do something? Even just a walk in the mall would help!

Maria* on 01/11/2009:
I think that is very wise to plan a few extra calories in your budget for the day, that way you don't feel defeated like you really overdid it and it will help you not OVERDO it.

Hope you have a wonderful visit with your GM...please give her a hug for me.

thinnside40 on 01/11/2009:
Have fun with your g'ma...

mama_nurse on 01/11/2009:
good job on today's cals

mama_nurse on 01/11/2009:
you've been here 3 yrs?? wow, thats awesome! i hope to say that someday. what was your highest weight? 137?

selina on 01/12/2009:
I love those collard greens, they are so good for you, too! I'm so happy to see that you are eating healthy snacks when you go see grandma, nowadays. I bet it makes a huge difference! Have a great, successful day, HoP!

loveray on 01/12/2009:
try not to be so hard on yourself!! you are making the effort and the loss will come- right now, try to feel into the body and think how much more vital and happy you feel without eating all of the trigger foods! i hope these thoughts satiate you until you can see the # on the scale. love to you

grumpy on 01/12/2009:
They will come, hang in there. and keep going to bikram yoga~ xo

Maria* on 01/12/2009:
Might be muscle causing the scale to be up (or sodium)...both will do it!!! Don't get discouraged.

skinnyjeans on 01/12/2009:
Great calories for the day...you are doing very well! And keep up all the yoga! You must be very flexible! Haha. :)

horn_of_plenty - Saturday Jan 10, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 133.0

good morning.

i almost gave into a peanut butter or other high calorie temptation but instead chose a low cal drink to satisfy myself after breakfast.

breakfast: 2 cellniques, large grapefuit: 280


12pm: snack before my SECOND hot yoga class: cellnique...and...

yoga 12:30-2:00 ...coconut water during yoga: 140.

snack while picking up a few things: large iced coffee 100 (520 so far)

3pm lunch: lots of yogurt, bran, banana about 500 cal.

snack at 5pm: a whole pint, packed!, of grilled veggies with olive oil. estimate: 250?

snack: kombucha...60

late dinner: 9:00pm...too late obviously...some terrible soup so i threw most away 100, and tofu/cucumbers in balsamic vinegar 220

total: 1650 or so...ehh, i will aim for lower cal tomorrow but i know not to be too strict or it'll backfire which is NOT in my plans.

i did two yoga classes in a row today! just a half hour break in between. i hadn't planned on two...just decided it while doing the warmup during my first class.  i was a bit nervous because it is hot yoga, lots of sweating and you really have to make sure you are hydrated and have enough energy to repeat the class again when it's over!  i was glad i decided to stay.  and yes, i had to start the second class pretty much very wet and with a wet towel on my mat since i wasn't prepared with more than that. in the future, i may do doubles one day on some weekends when i have the time. 3 hours of yoga total. and it was a VERY good experience. I can only thank myself for sticking with yoga and having a positive attitude with myself to be able to accomplish this. and i did pretty well in both classes. :) 

Progress as of today: -8 lbs lost so far, only 18 lbs to go!

Donkey on 01/10/2009:
I caught myself this morning too. I could feel the anxiety starting while I was fixing my post-workout breakfast (not to be confused with my pre-workout breakfast). Oddest feeling to acknowledge the feeling. I paused, took a few deep breaths and made a conscious decision to relax. I think I'll be OK.

But just the oddest sensation to catch yourself like that.

grumpy on 01/10/2009:
That's good. Congrats to both of you!!!

Donkey on 01/10/2009:
Hold steady there, Horn. I sense some shakiness going on there. Hang tight! You can do this!

WI3 on 01/10/2009:
HANG IN THERE!!! There is no reason to go backwards! YAY, HOP!

grumpy on 01/10/2009:
That's just fantastic!!! Two classes! Whoa. Hydrate and have yourself a treat too, you probably spend easily an extra 400 cals today!

mama_nurse on 01/10/2009:
thats fabulous!! good for you! ;)) you are doing great. whats coconut water?? lol

wiccan on 01/10/2009:
It sounds like you are doing great. I went to a party today and made the right choices with the food that was offered but still I ate a lot of calories this afternoon AND I didn't do any exercise today. Tomorrow I work the day shift and then hope to catch up on my machine after work. It's not going to happen tonight though unless I get some energy from somewhere. It's surprising how tired I am just from being social all day! Thanks for your comment I'm going to see how the scales treat me when I weigh myself on Monday.

sleeepy on 01/10/2009:
Way to go on making the wise food choice. I can proudly say I did the same last night. While I was typing my entry on Alli actually. Oatmeal Cream Pies were calling to me and I ignored them. Go us :) I totally agree about diet pills, but I understand the organic chemistry of how Alli works. It in no way gets absorbed into your body so there can be no harm done to your body. I admit I ALMOST bought hydroxycut but I listened to my brain screaming NOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Now THOSE kind of pills can mess with you and be dangerous. Boy did I learn that when I was 18 and took metabolife back when it had the ephedrine in it. OMG did it make me anxious. Makes sense considering its the synthetic form of adrenaline. Anyways, that's sooo awesome that not only did you go to yoga but you did TWO sessions. AND you came out of it feeling great. Way to go. That's awesome.

Maria* on 01/10/2009:
1600 sounds good! Sounds like you REALLY had a good workout with yoga!!!

Thanks for what you wrote to me. It helped a lot.

Hope you have a wonderful evening!!!

thinnside40 on 01/10/2009:
You sound like me when I tell myself I'll go 2-3 miles and wind up @ 4&1/2-6 miles... Just keep going, once you get started.. Great feeling once you settle down and reflect upon what you did for the day.... I'm happy for you!

selina on 01/11/2009:
Hi HoP! You are doing great, my friend! Happy New Year to you!

loveray on 01/11/2009:
i am so excited that you are feeling good in your body and seem to be able to delineate food as nourishment rather than as comfort. i broke down this week and dipped into the PB- not a good result! i think for the hundreth time i have learned that it is just a trigger for me, so why have it around in the house?? make sure to maintain your cals, especially in hot yoga- that is a lot of electrolyte and cal expulsion...i have to make myself ingest calories on weekends like these- i get SO psyched about the yoga that i sometimes forget- then at 5p i am wondering why i feel so exhausted...love you!

horn_of_plenty - Friday Jan 09, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 135.0

dinner was too sugary. a large grapefruit, large orange, seaweed salad again which deffinitely is marked too low in calories!, piece tofu, cellnique. too much food but i'm not going back for more. i should have had one less fruit, no seaweed salad. total: around 500

total cal today: 1620 still ok. hopefully i'm not really too off with calories...

i went to yoga, it was worth it. will go in the AM.


i promise to comment tonight on all your entries!

happy friday, happy weekend. i need it!  i want to just throw in the towel and not do yoga tonight, but why!? why should i mess with good health because i'm tired. yoga will make me feel better. it's what my body needs and it's like a medicine.  i have to remember this...always.

breakfast: apple, cellnique (you can look it up to see what it is online) 170

snack: drink 80 cellnique

lunch: a healthy (jk) hot pretzel w. ketchup/mustard and a coffee w. extra milk 420

snack: a little large so i am going to the later yoga class for sure. whole bag popcorn, 250, and a package of a store bought seaweed salad. i bought two of them, not sure if i believe the calories are really this low and there's a bit much garlic. not sure if i'll buy again. 200  (450 total)  i've been VERY munchy these past few days...due to being TIRED! this is what lack of sleep does to a person.

total so far: 1120

i can keep it in the 1500s. this would be really good.

Progress as of today: -10 lbs lost so far, only 20 lbs to go!

WI3 on 01/09/2009:
Yep, being tired makes us very munchy. GET SOME SLEEP! =)

hopinforachange on 01/09/2009:
good for you for making it to yoga. Have a good night and get some sleep. :)

Maria* on 01/09/2009:
Looks like you are really doing well! Congratulations to you and thank you for what you wrote to me!

sleeepy on 01/10/2009:
"i want to just throw in the towel and not do yoga tonight, but why!? why should i mess with good health because i'm tired" That sentence reminded me of my "No Excuses Attidtude" I had 5 years ago. Total I had lost 70 pounds. I would get home from work and be so tired, but I would tell myself "No Excuses." And if there were no excuses during those miserable, busy months of my life, there's absolutely no excuse for me now because I'm not working. Sure I'm going back to school, and its hard as hell, but its nothing like a hellish day at a job you hate and then geting home so depressed and exhausted, and STILL work out. Anyways, let us know tomorrow if you "threw in the towel." I'll let you all know if I took my Alli pill and didnt eat fatty food :)

horn_of_plenty - Thursday Jan 08, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 135.0

Breakfast: stopped at DD for a  bagel w. egg but didn't eat it all! wow. 300


lunch: Large Hot Pretzel with ketchup/mustard, coffee. 500

snack: green/protein drink, shot wheatgrass

400...plus 130 (lots of broccoli rab with pine nuts/raisins seasoned/oil from health food store!, 2 whole cucumbers, tofu...small orange, small apple)

total: 1430.


this is short because i have used all my anger crying...but luckily i have gotten that out of my system.  perhaps i'll talk about it tomorrow.

but after posting today's calories, i had to come on here again to say that in the past week, calories were not over 1550 i believe. now that IS progress. I went from binging every other day for months straight to keeping calories in check starting with the New Year.  I am very happy.


Progress as of today: -10 lbs lost so far, only 20 lbs to go!

Donkey on 01/08/2009:
Donkey was here, giving you the thumb's up for a great day!!!

Hang in there!

mama_nurse on 01/08/2009:

thinnside40 on 01/08/2009:
That makes me very happy for you too!!!!! You have been working at getting things straightened out and have been successful in '09... YES!

Sorry you had a bad day.... Crying can do wonders though.... Check back on ya tomorrow... Get some sleep!

WI3 on 01/08/2009:
You are doing fantastic!!! I am going to have to pick up some pine nuts and try those in my salad.

Oh the last paragraph in my entry isn't speaking to anyone here..just in general about how sometimes some things make you want to lose weight the right way and not by starvation and pills. I don't think anyone here is doing that, just thinking about it out loud I guess lol. Glad you had a good cry...I had one the other night myself =)

Have a great evening and keep up the fantastic work!

grumpy on 01/08/2009:
I am very happy for you too about your calories. Congrats. Sorry about the crying, I guess it was that kind of night, I've been crying myself a lot too in the past hour or so. This is so hard sometimes. Hope you feel better tomorrow. xo

Jen40 on 01/08/2009:
Oh huge hugs!!! For the crying AND for getting things under control with the calories. I'm so proud of you, but more importantly, hoping you are seeing how proud you should be of yourself.

Justine6Robert3 on 01/08/2009:
Amazing job on keeping your calories in check and no binging!! Sorry you had a bad day that lead to crying. Sometimes it's a good thing to have a good cry but I hope everything is okay. Sending hugs your way hun :0)

legcramps on 01/09/2009:
Oy, I hope you're doing better than I am with the crying thing! At work yesterday, I almost had to leave my desk three times because I thought I was going to lose my capacity to keep in my emotions! I hope your days get better, you're doing a fabulous job with diet and exercise - keep with that Yoga and you're gunna be one hot, toned chica! Have a good weekend HoP.

skinnyjeans on 01/09/2009:
I hope your Friay is going well...you are doing great!

mcwoo40 on 01/09/2009:
Have a great weekend,Julie

horn_of_plenty - Wednesday Jan 07, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 135.0

breakfast: 170 drink, apple

snack: 80 drink

lunch: big wrap w. turkey and mustard 450

snack: 240 bar

total so far: 940. really tiring day. i NEED to get MORE sleep. i've been going to bed way too late.

dinner: at first i was just planning on a smoothie made with a banana, a pear, some protein/fiber mix, and some light soy milk. all that for just 330 cal. but, i also ate some tofu with a really healthy quart of kale made with seasoning from a health food store. probably around 200 more cal. totaling 530 approx. but it was worth it...plus 2 red peppers (bingy mood!) 80

total cal: 1550which is still good.

i did hot yoga, glad i went! i almost shot it down because i was exhausted! you see, i have to get up early, around 6am....so even going to bed at 11 is too late!

Progress as of today: -10 lbs lost so far, only 20 lbs to go!

crittermom on 01/07/2009:
Are you getting enough nutrients? That could be the cause of your extreme tired state, too.

skinnyjeans on 01/07/2009:
Doing excellent today...try to get some rest tonight!

Maria* on 01/07/2009:
It is so easy to stay up late...sometimes my Hubby is snoozing away and I am wide awake past midnite!!!

hopinforachange on 01/07/2009:
You are doing so good. I hope that you can get some more sleep tonight. Take care of yourself!

Panda22 on 01/07/2009:
I hear you on the getting up early thing...I get up at about 4:45 every morning just to get a work out in because by the end of work I'm too exhausted and that ends up being my excuse. In fact I think I'm about to get to bed now....8:30PM...go figure. Nice job with eating good and doing your yoga today! Goodnight =)

mama_nurse on 01/07/2009:
Hope you get a good night's sleep!!!

grumpy on 01/07/2009:
what a great day! congrats and hope you get some sleep.

loveray on 01/08/2009:
went really well- and looks like you are KILLING your plan recently. be careful not ingesting enough cals and going to all the hot classes- can deplete you majorly and not be able to sleep or study...we know what that can lead to. love you very much!

starfish on 01/08/2009:
Happy for you :-)

Justine6Robert3 on 01/08/2009:
Sounds like a great day HOP! Sounds like you definetly need more sleep. I've always had trouble sleeping and it can really effect your day from you mood and your patience and all kinds of things. I even find when I'm really tired I want to eat more!

I took your advice and I'm so excited to tell you that I ate a veggie stir fry!!! The best part is I LOVED it! It occured to me that I do like some veggies although I always figured the one's I like aren't all that great for you, that they're more empty veggies.....I don't know....maybe you can shed some light on it for me. I actually love onions, mushrooms, peppers, cucumbers and potatoes. I like raddishes and carrots but only raw, and I'll eat corn but only corn-on-the-cob (which usually involves butter which I'm completely avoiding)

Anyways, I thought since I don't mind some chinese food I picked up bean sprouts at the store and I steamed them with mushrooms, onions & red peppers. Then I added about 4 oz of boneless skinless chicken breast (cooked with no butter, just spiced) then I added it together, put a little bit of soy sauce on it and it was delicious! I know it likely seems like an odd combo but I just put in things that I liked and it was really tasty.....to me at least :0) Now I'm wondering how to put it all into fitday to work out my calories.....hmmmm....

So I don't know how great those kind of veggies are as far as nutrition and vitamins but HOP I ate veggies and liked it, woo-hoo!!! So enough about me but I just had to share this with the "Veggie Queen" herself....you :0)

horn_of_plenty - Tuesday Jan 06, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 135.0

tuesday...off to an ok start but could have used more sleep!

B: 170 drink, apple

S: 80 green drink

L: 250 1/2 turkey wrap

snack: coffee 50

huge ass dinner: 32 brussel sprouts with some oil stir fry along with scallion 450, tofu90, 2 peppers 60, green beans w. almonds 115 (total around 700)

total: 1250 nice. :) i may have something small though later.

snack: cellnique.

final total: awesome at 1330. wahoo!  I can make this work!

no yoga because i stayed at school late and i want to relax and also wanted to enjoy a large dinner without needing to go to bed right after. tomorrow i'll be back to my normal schedule with yoga.


Progress as of today: -10 lbs lost so far, only 20 lbs to go!

greengirl on 01/06/2009:
I wish I had a � for every time I said that :)

Maria* on 01/06/2009:
Lovely photos!

loveray on 01/06/2009:
dang girl!! make sure you arent starving yourself either- i know how that can be related to the binge cycle...i had brussels for dinner too! i love them. xoxo

grumpy on 01/06/2009:
Great day, congrats HoP!

grumpy on 01/06/2009:
thanks for your comment. i don't even wanna meet another guy for now. i just hope i get over him and all this soon. the lunch was really yummy and i was surprised how low the calories were when i checked online (i went to doc greens, not sure they have those there). yummy. it was a big sandwich too. :)

omahagrl on 01/06/2009:
Great menu!

WI3 on 01/06/2009:
Congratulations! Great job!

thinnside40 on 01/06/2009:

Oatmeal with nuts & fruit ~ Isn't that something.... You can't eat it, cause you would want more...But for me, it is a great day starter... Truthfully, I don't like breakfast.... Never have, but know I must make myself eat it to benefit my body the best....

Great Wednesday thoughts to you!

skinnyjeans on 01/07/2009:
Great calories! I am so happy for you...keep up the good work!

starfish on 01/07/2009:
wonderful day!!

horn_of_plenty - Monday Jan 05, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 137.0

(this is for me: in the past 30 days, i've binged on 14 of them. some binges were not huge but others were. however, in the past 7 days, i've binged once and it was BEFORE the new year. i am doing well for myself)


i just ate dinner WAY too late, at 8pm ending at 8:45 and i was going to try to go to bed early. i made the mistake of eating in the kitchen (i usually don't haha) and i went back for 350 more calories after my dinner. it was a mini binge. the good thing is i stopped myself (due to fullness!) and didn't ruin the calorie count for good today, thank god! i put some hard work into my yoga practice.

as for my professor that just passed away, turns out the funeral was a more relaxed graveside funeral. also, the wife will NOT being having people over to sit shiva as they call it. so, i am left to send a card. i would have went to her house, and was planning on running over today after work, but now i'll be writing out a card to her and enclosing a picture of her husband with me at a music recital i played in college. i'll never forget him. :)  good man! :) thanks for your comments about this.

calories throughout day till yoga:  660 mostly really healthy.

calories for dinner: WAY too much but mostly healthy besides the 350 extra. total: 820 dinner calories which is not so good right before bed!

total calories today are ok: 1480. but i do  need to eat a little less next time and not in the kitchen - i always go back for more. it's weird, but i usually eat at a table i have in my room. don't ask!

lots of interesting things went on today and i'm happy to be back on school because life will not progress if you're only on vacation!

Progress as of today: -12 lbs lost so far, only 22 lbs to go!

grumpy on 01/05/2009:
you loose 300-600 cal on a bikram yoga class, so don't worry about dinner and celebrate that you went to yoga and that you stopped yourself from eating any more. xo.

loveray on 01/05/2009:
yay! you are whooping bootay in 2009. your professors wife will be forever grateful to any and all comments you have regarding him. love you!

starfish on 01/05/2009:
very good :-) You can do it!

thinnside40 on 01/05/2009:
Your intentions were well at any rate and sending a card with a photo will mean a great deal to her I am sure...

AS for your day ~ YAYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Congrats for "stopping"... :o)

skinnyjeans on 01/06/2009:
You are doing GREAT in 2009! Keep it up! :)

SkinnyFatGirl on 01/06/2009:
stay on it!

Donkey on 01/06/2009:
I think she will appreciate the photo and how he touched your life.

horn_of_plenty - Sunday Jan 04, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 137.0

it's gonna be a busy night. school tomorrow after 10 lovely days off. sorry i'm not gonna comment on your diaries.

snack: dunkin donuts med iced coffee 70

lunch: popcorn, cellnique 340

snack: cellnique (yeah, i drink it too much!) 90

dinner: humongous! veggies seasoned/salted 220, more veggie stir fry w. tofu 180, more peppers 90, kombucha 60. total here: 550 good stuff, man!

total for today: 1240! yeah man, nice way to start off the week! i will do this! i will lose this weight! i will do it, yeah!

update: i will definitely go to pay shiva at my professor's wife's house sometime this week. i must observe his passing and he had a profound impact on my life so i will definitely go and pay my respects.


i got an email saying my french horn professor from 2000-2004 while in college died recently. He was teaching at the university while either in his late 70s or possibly it was his 80s.  I'm not sure. He was REMARKABLE.  one of the most honorable and respected people i've known in my life.  he was a horn player for the Chicago Symphony as well as the Radio City Music Hall in NYC.  It actually made me unable to sleep and I'm up around 5am today.  I'm unable to go to the funeral which is during the day monday and even though i feel sorta bad, i will only be sending a card.  I will definitely write a lot, not just my sincere condolences, but i cannot bring myself to go the his wife's house, especially because of my decisions to step out of the world of music.   she doesn't know me very well if she does remember me at all from the few times i was in his house for lessons when we didn't have them at school.  i regard him highly and it's a lot to think about. i'm sure the funeral will be filled.  I'm not sure how he died, but he was very active i know up till a few years ago - then i lost tough with him after graduating.  i actually feel a pang of guilt not stopping by the house which is about 30 minutes away.  i hope i don't go to hell for this.

breakfast: tea, cellnique, grapefruit.... it's not even 7am yet... 190


Progress as of today: -12 lbs lost so far, only 22 lbs to go!

loveray on 01/04/2009:
losing anyone who was a major influence in your life is SO difficult. however, you will not go to hell (jews dont believe in hell anyway;) for not visiting him or being able to see him. i know you were a HUGE gift in this mans life, HOP. despite his prowess in the symphony and other musical areas, i guarantee that you touched his life in a real way every time you practiced with him. the most loving thing you could do is write a short note to his loved ones telling them how much he changed your life! that is the greatest reward of all. i love you, get some rest!

wiccan on 01/04/2009:
Thank you for your comment. I truly appreciate it. I kind of knew it was all that watery soup and the extra water that I've been drinking more water. I really appreciate you saying it though, Grin.

thinnside40 on 01/04/2009:
Get some rest & it is good of you to feel that you must go visit his widow.... Happy MOnday thoughts!

mama_nurse on 01/04/2009:
what's cellnique?

WI3 on 01/04/2009:
Sorry to read about the loss of a great man. Always so sad. Very good for you to go pay your respects, I am sure that given his lifelong passion, he would have loved knowing he made an impact on folks and they remember him at his passing. Take care of yourself!

grumpy on 01/04/2009:
Wouldn't it be great if people said those things about us when we pass? Sorry about your loss, but seems like he had a rich life and passed his music and character lessons on not only to you, but I am sure many others. I am glad you decided you can go. And happy to see your attitude and amazing menu today. xo.

Justine6Robert3 on 01/04/2009:
Although it would be nice if you could pay your respects you certainly won't go to hell for not going hun :0) Any gesture towards the family will be appreciated by them. When I lost my Dad to cancer it was so touching to see how many people showed up at his funeral but it was also understandable that not everybody could and they reached out to us in other ways....a card, flowers....it really will all be appreciated and bring comfort to his loved ones. I agree with lovray that sending them a card with a note telling them that he changed your life will be very much appreciated.....they will just be touched that he is going to have been remembered by so many and that he truly touched people while he was here. It's always difficult to loose somebody special to you.....sending you some virtual hugs HOP...

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