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horn_of_plenty - Monday Nov 27, 2006
(still counting down 65 days...)
Weight: 111.8

day 16...weight down to 111....

day 17, Monday.

I was pretty hungry during the morning and ended up having a pretty large amount of peanut butter, which helped till later. I definitely had a good share of peanut butter and hummus. For dinner, I stuff myself with two whole bagged romaine salads and a frozen chopped broccoli and a large red pepper and some chicken, all with a little olive oil. I was going to have avacado, but decided against it based on how the whole day went.

Hummus comes in all flavors and varieties. In the supermarkets by me, there are also like a bazillion brands that make hummus and products like that. Actually, I didn't even have hummus today, it was called babaganoush, or something like that, it's in school in the refrigerator so i can't check. Grilled eggplant with some sort of mayonaise.

I estimated my calories to be like 1780 or so. I don't calculate as I go through the day anymore, now I just look because I'm curious at the end of the day.

I'm unsure about all these pills as well. I'm just gonna see how the week goes, and decide if I want to return them. The store accepts anything to be returned! that's the coolest part, i'd say. but we'll see. and yes, the vitamins are like a kick in the rear end to keep going with this diet! I'm not sure I could do it without any support, that woman is there EVERYDAY, I do think of her as support as well because I see she is in good health and does it this way.

goodnight all.

Progress as of today: 1.6 lbs lost so far, only 3.8 lbs to go!

Scruffy on 11/27/2006:
Scruff was here :)


Runner on 11/28/2006:
Maybe if I had a diet where I could consume peanut butter liberally, I would stick to it! Hmmm...what kind of peanut butter are you eating? The all-natural kind?



horn_of_plenty - Sunday Nov 26, 2006
(still counting down 65 days...)
Weight: 111.4

Day 17 - Weight was up today, 111.8 hmmm. it's still low I guess...

---------------------------------------------------------------

Day 18 - Sunday. Same weight.

the balsamic vinegar question: I only have the dark as well. I find the white vinegar not as potent or enjoyable!

I'm doing okay. At times, I wonder if this diet is good because it teaches me how to stop eating when I'm done with a meal or snack. In the past, there was no cue signalling me to just stop even though my cue for being full already happened. If my head wasn't satisfied, I could easily binge.

Now, this is only the 2nd day, but I see that there is a possiblity in me continuing this diet for a long time. Once again, I had a lot of vegetables and healthy foods. I'm not listing all the vegetables. Olive oil at every meal. Avacado with breakfast.

I am nervous about how much is too much of all of that. I also had peanut butter on an apple (a nice, satisfying amount that equalled probably about 2 tablespoons), and hummus on celery...and later, hummus on carrots! so, we'll see how this week turns out!

I think I am a little less bloated. However, the hummus has salt in it, which isn't cool! But, I'm not going to be that much of a stikler! I also had an egg, chicken, and a small piece of halibut today.

Yeah, i agree, hummus (like peanut butter and all of those rich treats), can be VERY addicting. I try to have all the veggies first and really end with a nice clump of it so I feel satisfied. It's hard, I am very used to a bit more protein in my previous diet!

alright everyone, have a lovely evening!

oh, the vitamins: one is a plant-based multivitamin that is all natural. I take two in the morning and two at night.

the second is called Acidazyne which is an enzyme that works with the pancreas and works just like they do to break down food. I take 2 in the middle of a meal. Supposedly, it breaks foods down like 10 times faster and better, who knows if it really does anything! I hope it is helping me positively...we'll see.

the last is called Megazyme, another enzyme. The enzyme works also help the body better control blood sugars and she told me to take 3 when I wake up, 3 after meals, and 3 at bedtime! hmmmmm, this could be all hogwash...but, I'll give it a try. I've already poisoned my body with sugar alcohols and protein bars! LOL

Progress as of today: 2 lbs lost so far, only 3.4 lbs to go!

Runner on 11/27/2006:
Wow, your diet sounds ideal---and I've tried something similar, but I didn't last too long. I admire you for being so disciplined. I've also tried digestive enzymes, but I don't think they've ever helped me. I'll be interested in your opinion.


borntocry on 11/27/2006:
You can make your own hummus without salt, but it won't taste as good... although you could probably use other spices like cumin or pepper to replace the salt.

Thanks for the comment you left me, it cheered me up a little! I really needed it too because if I thought Saturday was bad... I had no idea what was coming.


Moody on 11/27/2006:
You made a comment that really hit home with me.."If my head wasn't satisfied, I could easily binge."...Wow, very insightful.

I've only tried hummus once and didn't like it at all! I don't know if it was the brand or what..does it come in different flavors??


geevee on 11/27/2006:
I never buy ready-made hummus. I make it with a can of chick peas, 1Tbsp. tahini, garlic (already cut up and scoop it out by the spoonsful), half a lime or lemon, minced onion.


WorkingIt on 11/27/2006:
I am often amazed that we take the advice of someone who works at a retail outlet as to what we should be putting into our bodies, vs. going to the doctor and getting the bloodwork and really finding out if we are lacking in a vitamin, mineral or enzyme. I think it might be that we are looking for a reason other than the dreaded plateau, or we are afraid of regaining the weight back so much that we fixiate on ounces or three or four pounds. If the health food person says "this will work" who wants to go to the doctor and hear "you are perfectly healthy, don't waste your money on those things." And yet sometimes these expensive 'remedies' provide us with something that we forgot how to provide ourselves along the way, confidence and mental power. It allows us to trigger our mind into believing that we are fixing something, even though 'something' might not be broken. These things also help us feel as if we are actually doing something, because somehow we figure we aren't.

I am all for trying things as long as they don't destroy our inner organs, are safe, and keep us healthy. Sometimes the mental part needs a push in order for us to remember and/or realize that we are doing everything the right way.

Good luck!!!



horn_of_plenty - Saturday Nov 25, 2006
(still counting down 65 days...)
Weight: 111.4

Sunday, day 18, 111.4 still... after a big dinner (too much salmon!)!!!

Breakfast was really good today, cooked brussel sprouts with olive oil, some spinach with olive oil as well, avacado, and an egg.

for a snack about 2 1/2 hours later, an apple and peanut butter.

_-------------------------------------------------------

Saturday, day 19.

so, today was my first day of my primarily plant based diet. I had a huge(not bug, like I previously wrote by accident!!!!) assortment of things actually, two eggs and lots of veggies with olive oil for breakfast, a snack of some kinda old hummus on celery, some more celery, peanut butter on an apple, tofu and a lot of veggies with olive oil, a veggie drink, wheat grass, and a dinner which consisted of a kinda too big piece of salmon, two packages of portabella mushrooms, romaine, and brussel sprouts. no, I'm not kidding! I am capable of packing in the food.

I should've only had one egg for breakfast as well as half the salmon at dinner, as that's a protein serving size. Now, I'm not calculating calories, but I was interested in what they might add up to, so I checked it out as I was finishing my dinner. I would say today's calories would probably be around 1800. If I had half the salmon and one less egg, calories would be around 1600. whatever, who knows!

It was difficult today. I kept thinking that something wasn't right. It was hard to eat just vegetables, olive oil, and protein. I also had a little balsamic vinegar in my salad at dinner. However, most people who follow a diet like mine wouldn't use it because it has added sugar. It is so hard for me to buy all organic food, they are so expensive!

I am trying to see what I am capable of doing with the kind of diet. If I can't keep it up, I won't be able to do it. We shall see. So far, I kinda like it. I was definitely really hungry at certain times today, as usual! we'll see.

tomorrow I'll discuss the 3 different vitamins/enzymes that she suggested I take... goodnight and thank you for your support!

Progress as of today: 2 lbs lost so far, only 3.4 lbs to go!

mattscat3295 on 11/26/2006:
This new diet sounds kind of interesting. I just don't think that I would just start something like this without checking it out with my dr. I hope it does what is intended for you. Take care


geevee on 11/26/2006:
Be warned about the addictiveness of hummus. I love the stuff and eat it like I do potato chips. Once I start, it's real hard to stop. You can't beat its nutritional value but caloriewise, it's a killer.


Moody on 11/26/2006:
Your food plan sounds very interesting! I don't think I could do it as I am not a big fan of alot of veggies. I LOVE portabella mushrooms tho and could probably live off of them!!

I love balsalmic vinegar too and the brand I get (Regina) only has 1gr of sugar per serving compared to some others I looked at that had 2 or 3 and even more!! I use the dark kind, never tried the light. Does it taste different or do you know?

Anyway, sounds like you are getting alot of nutritous foods in!! Just listen to your body and see how you respond! Good luck!



horn_of_plenty - Friday Nov 24, 2006
(still counting down 65 days...)
Weight: 111.8

Saturday, day 19, 111.4! That's right! Somehow, my weight is still down! I really didn't expect that this morning, still so close to my Thanksgiving splurge! So far, so good...

-------------------------------------------------------------

Friday, day 20, 111.8

Hello everyone! Because I feel that my current eating and nutrition is not the greatest by any means, I am starting over! Yes, I think it is time. No more calorie counting to the extreme that I was. More importantly, no more refined grains or grains in general.

yes, I went to a health store today, one of the best in the area. I spoke to someone there who I always recognize is there whenever I stop in. I had a long talk with her, perhaps 45 minutes! She showed me a few vitamins and introduced me to a really good vegetable drink made fresh for me from cucumber, sunflower seed sprouts, a little ginger, romaine, and a few other things. It tasted similiar to wheat grass juice, but a bit smoother and less potent. It was good!

The vitamins she showed me support the pancreas and the intestine and also support blood sugar levels. She actually mentioned it before I could ask! I've been concerned about my blood sugar levels for awhile!

Now, I will be having a salad 3 times a day and healthy snacks which include veggies and hummus and things like that. I used to not use oil on my salads, but now I will be. I am a little concerned about the foods I will be eating because I want to have more energy, and not less! I told her this and she said that I would be perfectly fine. So, I'm trying it.

My mom is pissed at me because she says it's another diet phase. However, I feel like I've always been in the same diet phase, calorie counting, occasionally switching off between different types of foods. The same can be done with a "salad diet." There are all kinds of vegetables and proteins. I guess this diet would be similiar to GG's ABCDEF diet.

I hope it does make me feel good. I took the vitamins as she directed 2 during the meal as well as 3 after, different types. My stomach actually started to feel strangely less bloated all of a sudden that I said something to my mom about it. I was like, wow, my stomach feels so different! haha. Maybe all of it is in my head! But, I do feel there was a definite calming effect on my body after eating.

Goodnight everyone.

Progress as of today: 1.6 lbs lost so far, only 3.8 lbs to go!

Runner on 11/25/2006:
Wow---I would do anything to find some vitamins to help my bloating! Can you give me more information??


borntocry on 11/25/2006:
I think this is a good idea. You really don't need to lose that much weight and by dieting you risk getting caught in a starve-binge cycle which could lead you to actually gain weight. Believe me, I know what I'm talking about because this is what I feel has happened to me! At the moment you are able to recover quite quickly from a binge (as I was) but when you get older your metabolism will slow down. Rather than invest all your energy into losing one or two pounds now, you might be better off working to make sure you can maintain your weight on a long-term basis. You may even lose those one or two pounds in the process. Good luck!


Moody on 11/25/2006:
Hmmm..sounds interesting!!! Let us know how you are feeling with this new plan!! And yay that the numbers are down for you!


WorkingIt on 11/25/2006:
Congrats on maintaining your weight =)

I am going to be at my docs office in a month actually to get another blood panel workup and look at different types of vitamins/minerals. He cautioned me against going out and doing it on my own because of the different things that can happen with prescription medication, vitamins and herbs get combined. Of course I already knew that which is why I told him I wanted him to supervise..doctors..sheesh LOL

Good luck!



horn_of_plenty - Thursday Nov 23, 2006
(still counting down 65 days...)
Weight: 111.0

it's been a bit of a challenge today: 1261 so far. I am doing better now and I think the day will end just below 1700 calories today.

Day 20, Friday... Weight was 111.8 this morning. However, I know it is going to continue to go up in the mornings to come!

...and I've already had 751 calories today, and a little too much sugar. It's not exactly going to be easy these next few days!

_-----------------------------------------------------------

Day 21, Thursday. Total calories: 3400 calories today. (hopefully not more!!!!)

Yes, my weight was down, THIS MORNING! I ate normally this morning and afternoon. I had a 200 calorie breakfast. I went to do some yoga and had a 70 calorie drink there. Then, I came home and had a 290 calorie lunch and a cottage cheese about 30 minutes before our late afternoon Thanksgiving dinner.

For dinner, I stuck to a ton of white meat turkey, sauteed green beans and shallots, and cauliflower. I would say I had large portions and that this dinner equals 650 calories. oops, i forgot the salad, make that 700 calories.

I completely overindulged for dessert. I had HALF OF THE ENTIRE PUMPKIN PIE (I ESTIMATE THIS TO BE 1280 CALORIES), 1 CORNBREAD FROM DINNER (200 calories), AND A LARGE PIECE OF APPLE FRUIT CRISP (450 CALORIES?). THAT MIGHT BE TOO LOW FOR THE APPLE CRISP, BUT I'LL LEAVE IT. oh, I also had a ton of grapes: 150 calories.

well, it'll take a while to balance out that! I would like to be 111 again in 7 days. 7 days is a long time and hopefully I will meet my goal sooner by taking in a few less calories this weekend! ARG! That's how long it may take to even out this one day.

As soon as people got up from the table, I couldn't help but devour the pumpkin pie. I was the only one who had any pumpkin pie at all! I wasn't going to have any cornbread or apple crisp, but I couldn't help myself. However, I do not regret it. I enjoyed it and now I will have to watch myself, carefully.

gosh, my plan was to loose about 5 pounds before going away for Christmas. However, all I've been doing is maintaining, and even that has been a challenge. I need to get into a mindset where I actually do make a change in my appearance.

I am going to try to do yoga more often. When my membership to the gym runs out, I'm going to take time off and just go to yoga. In the new year, I will re-join the gym. I have 2 weeks left of the gym. I will continue to walk on my treadmill at home.

goodnight all. I hope you do not regret your Thanksgiving dinners as well!

Progress as of today: 2.4 lbs lost so far, only 3 lbs to go!

greengirl on 11/24/2006:
All your Thanksgiving lunches sound wonderful. just reading about them is making my mouth water :)


maria777 on 11/24/2006:
Hey, I overate on Thanksgiving as well but it was good! I LOVE pumpkin pie, just as you do! I had some also and though I didn't have 1/2 of the pie, I had other deserts, too! YUM!!!

Maybe we should just concentrate on maintaining through the holidays!



horn_of_plenty - Wednesday Nov 22, 2006
(still counting down 65 days...)
Weight: 112.6

day 21, Thanksgiving Thursday, my weight this morning was back down. hopefully, it will stay that way (maybe not tomorrow morning though!!!). 111 lbs.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Day 22, Wednesday. Ending the day with 1595 calories.

I was planning for about 1500 all day. However, I took a half hour walk on the treadmill from 8-8:30pm and was very hungry after. I was shaky and the 150 calorie forzen boca chilli didn't do it for me at all. So, I supplemented with the healthiest things available: 1 tomato, 1 pepper, and 7 baby carrots.

Luckily, I took a long time to eat the spicy chilli and the veggies that I had mostly at the end really put an end to most of the shakes. I hate when I get too hungry, which happens all the time with me even though I do eat small meals throughout the day, and I get the shaky feeling. I have never been told I have diabetes. So, who knows!

I have read on here that other people sometimes feel this way too. I think it was BTC, or maybe Runner, who said once that she was shaking she was so hungry.

I am excited now for different food tomorrow. I don't want to be in diet mode all day, though. So, I will just eat a lot of protein all day so that I am not excessively hungry for dinner, hopefully.

My weight is not where I want it. Hopefully it'll go down soon!

These past seven days were pretty good, with an average of 1593 calories per day.

Progress as of today: 0.8 lbs lost so far, only 4.6 lbs to go!

Scruffy on 11/22/2006:
Scruffy was here too :)


Horn_Of_Plenty on 11/22/2006:
That was speedy, scruffy!


borntocry on 11/23/2006:
Hi Horn_Of_Plenty,

I don't remember ever saying that I was shaking from hunger, but I easily could have as it does happen to me every now and then. Especially after working out on an empty stomach. I know many people do it but most of them seem to do it first thing in the morning. When you exercise in the evening, like I do, you can get really drained of energy if you don't have enough food in your system. In fact that happened to me just yesterday!

Thanks for the comment you left me. Yes, I have been feeling so sorry for myself because of the dual work/home insect infestations! I don't understand it - are they hitching rides on my clothes or something?! What a horrible thought - I'm just not going to dwell on that! I actually had insect-related nightmares all last night. Thanks for your sympathy!


gonnagetthere on 11/23/2006:
thanks! I'm really going to try. Oh that I were your size :)


maria777 on 11/23/2006:
That shaking sounds like hypoglycemia, or low blood sugar, which you can get if you are not eating enough, especially not enough carbs.



horn_of_plenty - Tuesday Nov 21, 2006
(still counting down 65 days...)
Weight: 112.4

Day 22, wednesday. odd, but my weight is up, 112.6

Plus, I had too much fiber yesterday in the form of one atkins protein bar with about 12 grams of fiber and then 2 balance bars with five grams of fiber each. You know, that bad kind of fiber from sugar alcohols and/or malitol! I did also have a lot of sodium. I still find it strange that my weigh is not a little lower, after 2 low cal days. I guess the weekend really did me in?

------------------------------------------------

Day 23, Tuesday. Supposedly, 1490 calories. However, the lean cuisine I had for dinner seemed to have some extra rice in it. It said 220 calories but I don't know whether to believe it! Despite that fact, the day is calculated to be 1490. I intend tomorrow to be about the same, 1500.

I also plan on doing yoga tomorrow evening because I always want to do it more than once a week and I don't have work Thursday.

I'll write on your entries soon!

Progress as of today: 1 lbs lost so far, only 4.4 lbs to go!

Scruffy on 11/21/2006:
Scruff was here :)


hippygal on 11/22/2006:
Well done on the low calorie intake. Enjoy your yoga


WorkingIt on 11/22/2006:
ohhh hooo sugar alcohols..ugh LOL

Have a great Thanksgiving!


maria777 on 11/22/2006:
Yes, that sodium will increase what the scale says for sure!

Happy Thanksgiving!



horn_of_plenty - Monday Nov 20, 2006
(still counting down 65 days...)
Weight: 112.4

day 23, Tuesday.

weight was the same as yesterday this morning. I had a bigger breakfast because my body felt it needed it in order to get moving out the door. I have planned for 1475 calories today.

----------------------------------------------------

monday, day 24, 1270 calories.

I had a choice to have either 1200 by eating a 100 calorie balance bar or 1270 calories by having a 170 calorie bar. My mind decided I was more hungry and I wanted something a bit more than the balance bar. I had a good day today, in all.

I wish I didn't have to go back to where I work this evening for more parent teacher conferences. Nobody ever comes to the band room anyway! I got less done because I had to do a lot of driving. Tomorrow's another day. I have rehearsal all evening.

Time to practice for a little and get ready for bed. Goodnight all!

Progress as of today: 1 lbs lost so far, only 4.4 lbs to go!

maria777 on 11/20/2006:
Hope you have a good nite! Good for you on your calories! BIG SMILE!!!!!


Scruffy on 11/20/2006:
Scruff was here :)


maria777 on 11/21/2006:
Hope you are having a WONDERFUL day today!!!!!


WorkingIt on 11/21/2006:
Great job! Sometimes breakfast is my biggest meal of the day!



horn_of_plenty - Sunday Nov 19, 2006
(still counting down 65 days...)
Weight: 111.0

day 24, monday. so far so good. I had a really light breakfast of a tiny apple and 4 tablespoons of ff cc on one rice cake. My weight was up today, 112.4 lbs. It will be down by tomorrow if I watch myself today, which I am.

--------------------------------------

day 25, sunday, 1911 calories.

mattscat, maria, geevee, moody, thanks for all of your kind words. Maria, from musician to musician, I see that you understand exactly what I was saying and also how it feels to have a lousy performance. I am also once again motivated to play better.

I gave a lesson today and the mother thanked me for inviting her and her daughter to the concert yesterday. she didn't seem displeased with me or like she didn't want me teaching her daughter anymore. that made me feel much better.

I am glad my calories over the weekend were high, but not skyrocketing high! not like the past weekends. It may have been because I was busier. Or, maybe because I am trying harder. But, I am going to continue to understand myself and prevent really high calorie binges. so far so good.

Goodnight everyone.

Thank you for all of your comments these past few days!

Progress as of today: 2.4 lbs lost so far, only 3 lbs to go!

WorkingIt on 11/19/2006:
Just catching up on your entries, you sure have been through an awful lot of emotional experiences this weekend! What a rollercoaster ride life is, isn't it? I think that we all have those things in life that we are so very good at, that when we fall down, we are beyond humiliated..we are crushed. Our biggest critic is ourselves especially if we hold ourselves to high standards or if our job is to instruct others on how to handle that very thing. Kind of like walking out of the bathroom with TP on your shoe, except a million times worse. =)

Yes, it is always worth it..I should have said it isn't always worth it to be a woman LOL!


Scruffy on 11/19/2006:
Scruff was here :)


Runner on 11/19/2006:
HI, there! I just got caught up on your entries. I'm sorry about your difficult performance...but I agree with workingit that we're our biggest critics...and we're often much harder on ourselves than others are on us. I'm sorry you had to go through that, but I truly believe that we learn from our "failures." I've sure had my share of them!

And congrats on not losing it with the food, especially when you were feeling down! Your hard work IS paying off!


borntocry on 11/20/2006:
Hi girl,

Sorry you had such a lousy recital. I read about it the other day but was having kind of a bleak day myself and was afraid that anything I might say would only make you feel worse! But I agree with everyone else - you are probably your own worst critic! I'm sure no-one expects you to be perfect. That's not your job as a teacher!

Anyway, maybe you can use this experience to motivate yourself to practice more regularly - I think you've mentioned before that you wanted to do this!


smiley2 on 11/20/2006:
Sometimes as an artist, you can be more critical of yourself than you should. Usually the audience doesnt even pick up on faults that musicians or actors make, so dont be so hard on yourself darling...nobodys perfect :)


WorkingIt on 11/20/2006:
YAY on your good day thus far! I keep forgetting to get the FF CC and I do enjoy it!



horn_of_plenty - Saturday Nov 18, 2006
(still counting down 65 days...)
Weight: 110.0

edit #2: did yoga and had a good breakfast. I binged for lunch on 1416 calories. so far, my caloric intake for today is 1701 calories. I plan on ending the day below 2000. I will probably have a double meat turkey wrap from Subway for dinner.

I thought i was too upset about how my performance was yesterday to binge, but I guess not.

edit 1: sunday, day 25.... weight is up a little, 111 lbs

going to do yoga in a little bit!

------------------------------------------------------

day 26 saturday, 1895 calories.

I am not happy with myself, I feel depressed and ripped apart. I royally messed up today in my friend's recital. I played the parts terribly wrong at times and embarassed myself completely. I went to play the horn today and everything came out wrong and I just knew today was not my day. Then, I got there, and warmed up on the horn, sounding just as bad.

the actual performance started and our quartet had to actually stop a few bars after we began because my friend and I had the wrong parts. then, I proceeded to continuouly mess up the music, playing only one major solo right. I was shaking with nervousness and my performance really suffered.

there were so many people in the audience and they are music educators. who will hire me now, after that complete and udder disaster?

does anyone know what i mean? I feel I need to apologize to everyone in the audience. I feel like I have to call my past teacher who's in his 70s who was there and tell him that I am sorry he had to listen to that garbage that came out of my horn.

wow. what kind of teacher am I?

the other people in the quartet included a senior in high school, a freshman in college, and the senior having her recital. I spoiled the whole thing. and I'm the teacher.

Progress as of today: 3.4 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

mattscat3295 on 11/18/2006:
Honey, we all have those days, I am sure that you were just nervous. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you.


maria777 on 11/18/2006:
I am also a musician...I am my church's pianist...I've been playing piano since I was a child...and sometimes when I am playing the piano at church, I may have a day when I find that I am REALLLYYY missing notes!!! You are a human being and we humans are NOT perfect. I know it doesn't feel good when your performance is off and I know it is embarrassing, but keep on keeping on anyway! You don't have to apologize. We musicians are probably our own worst critics.


geevee on 11/18/2006:
I was in the high school band but was a mediocre player, NEVER good enough to play the parts that you do. I can well imagine the pain you are suffering now, and don't know what to say to make you feel better.. I guess nothing would do.

But you know, not everyone is honed in on the details like you are, and probably many in the audience didn't detect the faults that you did, so you shouldn't worry about this particular performance. I'm absolutely sure that EVERY single musician has had a similar experience.

Think of an opera star and what is involved with hitting "that particular note" and how the star's whole reputation is at stake, and then you have compassion for what the general public would call bad night.

Don't worry about it! It's not as bad as you think it is.


geevee on 11/18/2006:
A PS - Your personal standard of excellence is not the same as the general public's.


Moody on 11/19/2006:
I am sorry that things didn't go as well as you had hoped. I am sure tho that you are your own worse critic and I was thinking the same thing that geevee said..if I was in the audience I am sure that I wouldn't have picked up on anything, I mean that. Nerves can really get the best of us sometimes, especially when we know that we have made a mistake, that just puts MORE pressure on us and seems like we screw up even more. But as I said, I'm sure you are your own worse critic. Did you talk to you friend afterwards and see what she thought?

On another note; you said you thought you would be too upset to binge. I find myself binging in the most in THOSE situations. Stressed, upset and frustrated...I am not at all surprised you took out your feelings with food.

Take care hon..I hope you have a relaxing Sunday. ****Hugs****



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