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horn_of_plenty - Monday Apr 02, 2007
(calorie counting, all foods, LOTS of veggies)
Weight: 0.0

3000 cal.

60 minutes of exercise.

today was a holiday meal. i had 1,000 calories throughout the day, and i'm estimating hopefully no more than 2,000 for the meal.

tomorrow is the same thing. i'm allowing 1,000 cal throughout the day and 2,000 for the dinner meal. but i'm allowing myself to eat everything, no exceptions. the past 5 days were all high in calories, especially the last 4. i have planned what I will do to rid myself of the excess calories in the next two weeks. i'll try to stick with the caloric intakes I have planned out. then, i'll allow myself some high calorie days after that.

in regards to that job situation, the end resolution is what everyone has told me, not to say anything. you are all right, it would create bigger problems for me to bring it up to her now. oh, what a bad idea! lol.

i did yoga today. it felt so good! I ran into way too many people i know, though!

have a great day!

WorkingIt2 on 04/03/2007:
Congrats on the exercise! And on finding a resolution to your job situation.

hollybelle on 04/03/2007:
YEA for holiday meals. Sounds like it was a good one. Hope the resolution you have found for yourself brings you peace in job hunt! Good emotional work to go through stuff like that - although feels bad at the time!

horn_of_plenty - Sunday Apr 01, 2007
(calorie counting, all foods, LOTS of veggies)
Weight: 0.0

Total calories today: 3110

Thank you everyone for your kind words, encouragment, and advice. I will take it all. The most difficult thing will be admitting to the girl I am rehearse with that I did in fact apply for her job and I will have to get it off my chest. I feel like I should have just admitted it awhile ago, like its been too long now since last summer. I feel like she will not believe it that I hadn't told her earlier. eh, it may not be a good idea to say anything about it. I'm not sure, Donkey. I know that it would definitely make me feel better. But, i doubt it would make her feel better towards me.

I actually did get some exercise in. That is a goal of mine...this is my vacation. I need to use it well. I didn't do yoga like I planned because i would not be able to contort myself into all the formations with such a bloated stomach. I'll go tomorrow anyway, despite how i feel. It's enough to just be there.

I will not be able to make up for all of the excess calories so quickly. It's an awful lot and tomorrow and the next day i'll be having family dinners with friends and family for the holidays. I don't even want to restrict myself at them...nor during the day.

I figure I'll just eat low calories once I go back to work in a week and a half. I have already eaten enough calories to gain one pound. With Monday and Tuesday, that total will probably add to another pound gain. LOL. nice job to me, jk.

have a goodnight....and thank you all again for your kind words. they do mean a lot.

I did 60 minutes of exercise today...WorkingIt, are you recording minutes this month?

Donkey on 04/02/2007:
Maybe not. "Least said, soonest mended." I'm ok with not saying anything as long as you are able to validate your own feelings and put this thing behind you. I only suggested you tell her what you are feeling because it sounded to me like you are carrying a heavy burden. Sometimes we have to put on a stiff upper lip and just make the best of a difficult situation.

sounds like you had a pretty good day otherwise.

hollybelle on 04/02/2007:
Just catching up with your posts. I was thinking about your issue with the person who go thte job you interviewed for, etc. Thing like this come up from time to time all our lives. Regarding how to approach her - or even if you want to - put yourself in the other person's position and think how you would be OK with it coming up between you. Also take her over all personality into account in the equation. I had a job for 25 years and was "reorganized" right out of it. I had interviews where there were people I knew in the industry who got them and I did not. I ultimately got a job that is good for me for now and I am more or less glad I didn't get some of the others-but that is NOW. At the time it did bother me that I didn't get the jobs because after all I just KNEW I was the obvious choice (LOL). The truth is that there is so much going on behind the scenes with job hunting and we aren't the ones in control. It is difficult to have hard feelings, but from what you described the gril didn't even know you had interviewed, or she might have handled the situation differently (at least I hope she would have. That is what I mean above by taking her personality into account when you decide what if anything to do. I think all this might not even be an issue if you had found a job and were in your own niche at this point. Being unemployed (even though no fault of our own)is one of the most stressful events in life. Hang in there and keep looking. I'm sure something will happen to you soon. In the meantime try to think good thoughts and have as little resentment as possible - that will surround you with good vibrations that will attract good things from the universe to you (you know I am not New Age minded - I believe in God - a Higher Power and Prayer, but I like saying things like that because I do believe God works through positive attitudes, etc.). Also, you never know who in that group of musicians will sometime be in a position to help you find the right job in the future. Just be your wonderful, self and I know you will find the job you want, soon. It took me a few years to really find what I loved doing. I was lucky enough to do that one for 25 years and then I have the one I have now that is different, but I love things about it, too!

geevee on 04/02/2007:
My mother always counseled, "It's not what you say that matters, but what you don't say."

I think this advice applies to your situation with the girl who got the job. Would anything be accomplished by saying something to her? I don't think so. It would just cause all kinds of problems.

horn_of_plenty - Saturday Mar 31, 2007
(calorie counting, all foods, LOTS of veggies)
Weight: 0.0

edit: today, sunday: breakfast = 2440 calories. it was calculated, no joke!

WI points: 2.

i had a rehearsal this morning. One of the people i was going with was a girl who has the job that i also interviewed for this summer. I invited her to the rehearsal because my other friend thought it would be nice to have another instrument in our ensemble. i don't know anyone else who plays this girl's instument, so i had to invite her based on the request of my other friend. long story short, the interviewer told me i did a good job at the interview then and there last summer. however, due to politics and connections, she got the job and i did not.

later last summer, i had carpooled with her (the one that got the job)before i knew she had the job. she greeted me with "guess what, I have a job!" when i entered her car. that was the same day i had called up earlier in the morning to see if the district where she got the job had moved on with its application process. i was devastated, to be greeted that way. I know that she was really excited for herself...and i was happy for her. but i was heartbroken at the same time. actually, it was too much for me to handle. I couldn't even calm myself down during the concert and sat in that summer performance sobbing. i was an utter mess. then, i had to drive home with her.

i still get sick thinking about that situation last summer evening. perhaps i'm jealous that she has the job that i don't. but, bigger than that, i can't believe she didn't even say hi to me when i entered her car that summer day. she just splurted out like someone who cannot control themselves at all that she got a job, without thinking how i might feel since she knew i was in the process of looking for one. of course, she didn't know that i even interviewed for her job. she also didn't know that i had called up that same morning wondering if they had moved on in the process.

i seriously hope rehearsing with her gets better...if it doesn't, i am going to have to leave the group and they will have to find a different horn player! I'm serious. I can't bear all of this pain. I am literally a mess.

if i don't get a job soon, i swear, i will look into another occupation. i can't bear it!

3775 calories. unhappy, upset.

greengirl on 03/31/2007:
I'm sorry you are feeling sad and I hope things improve for you soon. In answer to your comment on my post yesterday, a chip muffin in england is a bread roll full of french fries. What you call fries, we call chips. Our muffins are bread rolls, not cakes. Keep your chin up :)

WorkingIt2 on 03/31/2007:
I am FINALLY able to spend some time online. I am so sorry that you are unhappy and upset, especially now that you are on vacation :( I hope your ankle is feeling better today, and that your spirts are lifted before the days end. (((((((Hug))))))))

borntocry on 03/31/2007:
Poor dear. Oh well, there's nothing for it but to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start afresh tomorrow. Every day, in every way, you are getting better and better!

sharklover on 03/31/2007:
Oh no! I'm sorry that you are unhappy. I hope tomorrow goes better for you!

borntocry on 04/01/2007:
Oh, poor HoP! I can understand why you resent this girl. But if you must be around her, maybe it would help if you try not to judge her too harshly for her conduct last summer. If she knew that you had interviewed for the same job as her, her remark would have been almost unbelievably rude and selfish, but given the situation, it was just rather inconsiderate. Of course it came as a shock to you so it was understandable that you reacted the way you did.

It must be so difficult to deal with all the internal politics involved in your occupation, but look at it this way - at least you get to do something artistic and cool which you enjoy! Applying for office jobs is a much more straight-forward process, but then you're stuck at a desk watching the clock all day, like me!

jon'smom on 04/01/2007:
I'm sorry that you are hurting. But things will get better. You will rise above this!

girliegirl6486 on 04/01/2007:
I'm sorry you're upset and hurting. I HATE politics...that's how my roommate got Editor in Chief of my paper last semester and I didn't. I'm running again for EIC for the coming semester and the forum and vote are this Thursday, so I might be feeling just as down as you if I don't get it. At least my roommate isn't running for it again.

Try to focus on the positives, things will start looking up soon.

WorkingIt2 on 04/01/2007:
Job stress I understand all too well *sigh* it is so very difficult. I must say that while I have never been in this particular situation before, I know what it feels like to just have to remove myself from a situation in order to salvage the things that I love about who I am and what I do with my life. I think that when we remove ourselves from a situation because it is a way to preserve our identity, that is a positive move. If we remove ourselves from what we love because it hurts, the pain won..defeated us.and that is even more difficult to get over than anything else. I know you are expressing frustration and that your heart is so full of pain, I can feel it from over here! And I support you in your pain and say let it all out! And then when you are in a better place, remember your dreams and how you were made specifically to do what it is that you do. You don't have that dream inside of you because you woke up one day and decided you'd like it...you were born with it. There is nothing worth leaving behind your dreams. Even if it does sting and we might have to abandon it for a little while.

((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))) hang in there

Donkey on 04/01/2007:
I honestly do not think she meant to throw her job in your face. BUT having said that, if you find that rehersing with her gets to be too much, stand up for yourself and tell her kindly and diplomatically how you feel. Find a quiet moment to take her aside and explain, "I'm not sure you're aware of this, but I applied for that job too. I'm happy for you that you got it, but I was also very disappointed that they did not hire me. I find my feelings getting in the way of our working relationship, and I just wanted to let you know where I'm coming from, to kind of get it off my chest so that I can move forward."

Don't stuff your feelings with food; your feelings about this job situation deserve validation. I mean, I can't imagine how much that must have hurt. Like salt in a deep cut on your finger. Ouch.

Chubby1 on 04/06/2007:
I am going to try the veggies more. Thanks!!!

horn_of_plenty - Friday Mar 30, 2007
(calorie counting, all foods, LOTS of veggies)
Weight: 0.0

edit: for those wondering about my ankle, i had broken it years back. it gets week when i overuse it. so, i ran one day (tuesday) and then walked a little too much on it wednesday. Now, its a bit week and hurting from overuse. I've learned that running/walking is best done every other day...for me right now, anyway. however the yoga helped it a lot last night!

WI points: i did yoga, but no walking. no points.

calories: 2055.

many types of foods. a bit too much splenda, diet foods. but, also a nice amount of veggies. I haven't been having a lot of my usual apples a day or any fruits because i'm allergic to them around this time of year! yup, during the spring, when i have my seasonal allergies to pollen, i am also more allergic to fuits and they leave my throat ichy and i start to cough. so, not as many fruits right now.

i'm so happy i did yoga. it really helped me relax and it was a perfect class. I ran into a few people i know there, too!

as for the peanut butter cheese crackers...they are the typical vending machine food. so, biscottibody guessed right! they are simply peanut butter on crackers that are cheese flavored! i wished there was more peanut butter on them, but they did hit the spot.

goodnight all!

borntocry on 03/31/2007:
Oh, how did you break your ankle? My husband has a similar injury - he was playing basketball at college when someone jumped up and came down on his ankle. It wasn't broken but the orthopaedic surgeon said it was the worst ankle injury he had ever seen, and it ended my husband's promising tennis career (which his coach was not too happy about!). To this day he does ankle exercises every day to keep it strong, because it has a tendency to bother him too. I don't know if anything like that would help you, but personally I have also found that running/walking every other day works better for me than every day. If I do it two days in a row, I make sure it's a very short distance and/or relaxed effort.

horn_of_plenty - Thursday Mar 29, 2007
(calorie counting, all foods, LOTS of veggies)
Weight: 0.0

yay, finally. bed with good calories. Total cal: 1360.

tomorrow i'm planning on up to 1700.

i'm also MAJORLY excited to do yoga in the early evening.

i'll officially be on vacation after tomorrow, so yoga...here i come!

so, I've had a pretty good day.

No exercise...my ankle has been bothering me since yesterday.

I bought some peanut butter cheese crackers...i was craving them.

I hope to keep calories around 1500 today.

Perhaps another update tonight!

borntocry on 03/29/2007:
Peanut butter cheese crackers?! I don't know what those are but they sound irresistible!

greengirl on 03/29/2007:
I have to echo BTC! Peanut butter cheese crackers??? My eldest son would love them. Peanut butter and cheese sandwiches are his favourites!!!

borntocry on 03/29/2007:
Peanut butter and cheese sandwiches? Now that's just gross...

GG on 03/29/2007:
What did you do to your ankle? I hate when I hurt my legs/ankles/knees but it hampers my walking and I LIVE TO WALK! haha! Good luck on your calories! I know I am going to be eating a ton tonight because its DADS cooking tonight! haha!

Justine6Robert3 on 03/29/2007:
Yummy, peanut butter cheese crackers!!! I've never had them but I put peanut butter on cheese nip crackers and its soooo good. My daughter loves it also. Everybody else thinks it's gross to put cheese and peanut butter together but they obviously have never tasted it, its so yummy!!

Good job on your calories today! Enjoy your vacation and your yoga classes!!

Justine6Robert3 on 03/29/2007:
Hope your ankle feels better!

hollybelle on 03/30/2007:
ARe the PB cheese crackers what we used to call Nabs? I love those - especially with a diet coke!

horn_of_plenty - Wednesday Mar 28, 2007
(calorie counting, all foods, LOTS of veggies)
Weight: 0.0

i did get in my exercise. WI Points: all.

I didn't go to a rehearsal tonight because i've simply had enough. i didn't want another late night. it wasn't a very important rehearsal...and if the conductor doesn't want me there bc of too many missed rehearsals, that's fine! yeah, i'm not worried about this one. Tomorrow i have a late night, for 4 1/2 hours, and that's simply enough for me!

I planned on eating around 1760 calories, but overate in desserts - 3 greek yogurts and an apple, to reach a total of 2070 calories today.

therefore, now I have a five day average of 1850.

If i eat around 1400 tomorrow, i can lower my total to 1775.

thanks for your concerns about my teeth! I agree that it would be VERY unfortunate to mess up my mouth at the young age of 24! I plan to get them out this summer...I'd unfortunately be paying. But, that's the time when i can most spare having the surgery.

have a goodnight!

Justine6Robert3 on 03/28/2007:
I'm glad your tooth is feeling better. The fresh air is so nice and it really cheers you up when you get a little sunshine!

Hope you get a good nights rest for your rehearsal tomorrow!

horn_of_plenty - Tuesday Mar 27, 2007
(calorie counting, all foods, LOTS of veggies)
Weight: 0.0

4 day total = 1795. i'd like a tad bit lower.

today i ate 1400 instead of 1200. I went overboard on dinner. it was good, though. just too much volume. really filling, how i like it. but i probably should have stopped before the 100 calories of sugar free jelly i had! (10 tablespoons).

2 WI points! yay!

i'm sooo happy i got to go outside today. I jogged for about 20-25 minutes and walked for the other 5-10 minutes!

hotmomma on 03/27/2007:
Don't you love the sweet spring air? There is just something about it that makes you happy. great job on your eating efforts, wish I could get myself to eat a bit less but I am not quite there yet.good job:)

borntocry on 03/28/2007:
Hi! Thanks for looking at the shirataki noodles for me! I've read a lot of reviews online so I know about the smell. Hope it doesn't put me off too much (but it takes a lot to put me off food, haha). It's funny how some reviewers seem to love them and others hate them. I am really curious now - I can't wait to see what I think of them!

You're doing great with the exercise, by the way! That's a nice long jog/walk you got in there!

And thanks for your input on my weight/exercise situation. I've tried doing sit-ups off and on but am not doing them at the moment. But my abs/stomach area is not the problem - it's my hips! I am getting sick of dieting, but as you mentioned I have to keep it up for a few more days because there's going to be some serious over-indulgence with my family around next month!

hollybelle on 03/28/2007:
Glad to hear tooth is better. Keep an eye on it. I think everyone sufficiently "fussed" about it to you, but what all said is true. Don't mess around with infection - especially in tooth......Good day - yay for outside activity!

greengirl on 03/28/2007:
Isnt it great to get out in the fresh air!!! Ten tablespoons of jelly!!! YUMMY!!!

GG on 03/28/2007:
Hey, so you say those YAM NOODLES fill you up? Do they make you bloated? I asked my mom about them and well she said they would probably make me really bloated to the point of being uncomfortable. Is this true for you?

horn_of_plenty - Monday Mar 26, 2007
(calorie counting, all foods, LOTS of veggies)
Weight: 0.0

WI points: zero. big fat zero.

the pain from my wisdom teeth is gone...but i've read up and all readings reccommend removal...so i will plan their removal. not yet though. I would if I didn't have upcoming performances!

foods today are a lot volume-wise. but, calorie-wise they're great. I thought i would reach around 1320, but then i ended up choosing a different lean cuisine for dinner. calories reach 1200!

Breakfast: egg, extra large peach.

snack: egg

Lunch: carrots, tomato, tofu.

snack 1: yogurt and balance bar

snack 2: four large plums

snack 3: two servings potato chips (300 cal)

all the snacks were straight in a row, close to one another, within a 1 hour time frame.

dinner: shirataki noodles and fettuccini lean cuisine.

goodnight all.

i took a nap this afternoon because i was so tired. I'm still catching up on sleep! next week i have off from school...so I WILL rest up then!

borntocry on 03/27/2007:
Glad the pain is gone. I guess it might come and go, so hopefully you will be able to tell what's normal and what's not!

I didn't find the shirataki noodles at Asian supermarket last weekend. It seems there is a place where I can order them online, but they come in a packet with Japanese writing on it so I won't be sure about the calories. What do you think I should do? Would you take a look at the picture for me and tell me if it looks like the right thing? Here's the link:


It's labelled on the website as "SHIRATAKI Taro Vermicelli". That sounds right, doesn't it?!

greengirl on 03/27/2007:
I quite fancy the shirataki noodles too, but can only find them online. Can they really have no calories in them?? How can that be?? Sounds too good to be true. Just because your teeth have stopped hurting for now doesnt mean you should forget about them. You should get them sorted out as soon as you can to save yourself future pain :)

WorkingIt2 on 03/27/2007:
I am happy that your teeth stopped hurting!! I was reading something today that got me thinkinking about you and how you calorie cycle..this was pretty interesting!


horn_of_plenty - Sunday Mar 25, 2007
(calorie counting, all foods, LOTS of veggies)
Weight: 0.0

WI points: 2

edit: thanks to hollybelle and donkey for advise...it seems my teeth/jaw are feeling a little better. so, i'm not going to act until it gets worse again. This is a really bad time for me to do anything with my mouth because I have upcoming performances! however, if the pain gets worse, I will just have to step out of those obligations.

food today didn't end near as bad as it could have! total: 1640.

goodnight all! hoping for a good week!


yesterday I ended at 3080 calories. I didn't think i was mentally even able to have a binge, but i did!

so far, today has not been good. Breakfast: 2 pieces tofu, one egg, one apple, 3 Powerbars! total: 970 cal.

hollybelle on 03/25/2007:
How is your tooth? You cannot lt that go. Don't mean to "butt in", but infection can go to blood sream and be very dire. Now, that said - it is normal for gum to swell before a tooth erupts. Do you think tooth is erupting or is actually infected. You cannot delay treatment if it is infected. Oral Surgeons have payment plans - they will work with you. Do not use no insurance as excuse to delay treatment. It can have consequences you cannot imagine. Again, sorry to butt into your business, but this could be serious. Get medical advice - at least.

Donkey on 03/25/2007:
I agree with hollybelle not to let the infection go on until summer. See if maybe an antibiotic would clear up the problem temporarily (and more cheaply). ??Maybe??

Justine6Robert3 on 03/25/2007:
I agree with hollybelle, you really shouldn't let that go for any length of time. It really could lead to much worse problems if it is an infection or an abscess. You should really have it checked out.

Soon2BThin on 03/25/2007:
Didn't you hear about that young boy, whose parents didn't take him to the dentist and he DIED from the infection??! So I agree with the others about this. Sorry to butt in, lol. Hope it gets better and you have a good week!

borntocry on 03/26/2007:
At least look up your symptoms on the Internet to see if what you're experiencing is "normal" pain from impacted wisdom teeth or something more serious, like an infection. If it is infected then I think you do need to see a doctor right away. You can ask for antibiotics, you know - they can't force you to have your teeth out. If it's not infected than you can easily wait a few months. But it would be better to know.

WorkingIt2 on 03/26/2007:
Glad to read that you are feeling a little better. And that is a very good idea to step out of those obligations if need be! Better to step out of those obligations to take care of your health than to step into something bad! I hope you are just going through the normal stuff of teeth trying to come out vs. an infection. Take care of yourself and have a wonderful day!

horn_of_plenty - Saturday Mar 24, 2007
(calorie counting, all foods, LOTS of veggies)
Weight: 0.0

edit; no wi points

Edit for Saturday: at first I thought I could honestly add in a little ice cream...i was full anyway...just wanted to relax and lay back with it for a change of pace. a little ice cream turned from one cup to two cups. then, it lead into a complete binge. chocolate bars, 2 power bars, an apple, 2 chocolate covered matzo crackers, two servings of potato chips. I'm glad it didn't go as high as 4000-5000. If I include yesterday's 1460, it won't take me that long to get back on track. i'm not very worried.

i am wondering if my throat is sore do to sickness from not enough sleep all week or if its from an infection with my wisdom teeth/jaw. All I know is that i am going to take the "suffering" route. I can't get them out right now. I have no insurance. I have to perform on the French horn. It's NOT a good time. you know, i was saying this last year, too!

I will do it this summer...although I don't have insurance...if they continue to bother me. Otherwise, I will wait all the way till next year, when I hopefully DO have insurance. I'm keeping my fingers crossed on that one!

oops, miscount. 3080

2 WI points. 3,000 calories

It's saturday now. 6:25pm. I'm beat! ....enjoying some black raspberry Turkey Hill ice cream


this entry is really for friday: WI points: none. no time.

food intake: 1460. I ate about 5 hundred calories right before bed...and when i woke up today, my throat was sore! arg!

see ya all later...i'm going to a certification class for an event near me all day from 9-4! actually its not VERY close, its around 45 minutes away!

WorkingIt2 on 03/24/2007:
Have fun at your event! I hope you feel better =)

borntocry on 03/24/2007:
Hmm... hope your throat's feeling better...

WorkingIt2 on 03/24/2007:
Ice cream sounds great right now lol. I hope you are feeling better and that you get a good night's rest!

sharklover on 03/24/2007:
mmm, turkey hill has the best ice cream!

smiley2 on 03/25/2007:
Wisdom teeth that gets infected can pose a real danger to health. Maybe you should just get them checked out for some peace of mind. Wx

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