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innerpeace - Wednesday Jan 02, 2019

Weight: 315.4

Received text from boss not to come to work...still furloughed.

B - yogurt

L/D - leftover peanut chicken with 1/2 cup of rice

S - granola cups

protein drink with PB powder

still drinking lots of liquid  no soda/pop

Feeling a little bummed about not working. I did ask my coworker who is to take down the Christmas tree, I surely don't want to deal with it when I finally do get to work.

Have a great night! IP

Progress as of today: 6.2 lbs lost so far, only 105.4 lbs to go!

Donkey on 01/02/2019:
Good idea about asking someone else to take down the Christmas tree at work.

Keep looking up. I continue to pray for your situation.


legcramps on 01/03/2019:
Our tree is so large, we need to have three maintenance workers do it. But I have to take down all the decorations on it, so that's going to suck for sure.


horn_of_plenty on 01/03/2019:
yeah, i'm SOOOO not pleased hearing about this government shutdown. on the same note, i do NOT think we should be paying for the Mexican wall...just because trump says so...

seems both democrats and republicans are not happy about the wall and payment discussions. but i think it's nuts that the government is furloughed now instead of reporting to work like the rest of the world! like, really!?



innerpeace - Tuesday Jan 01, 2019

Weight: 315.4

Happy New Year!

So...yesterday DH had a talk with the YA. The YA's intentions are good, however, we do have limitations. I am so upset that this YA (he will be 21 in February) will not go back to school - I also have three nephews who did not finish school and I've seen and continue to see what they DON'T do with their lives and how much hardship and heartbreak they do to my mother. With that being said, I have told the girl on numerous occasions that if she drops out of school, I don't even want her over at my house. I don't condone it. Education is everything. I told her she can see her dad whenever she wants, that they can go to dinner or lunch or anything, she just would not be welcome at the house. She's said she understands and works hard in school.

So with that ammunition DH told the YA that because we have told the girl that she wouldn't be allowed to stay here if she drops out of school, then what picture is that painting if we let him stay and he didn't finish school. He said he understood and wasn't mad. Which getting mad at DH was my worst fear as when I first moved up here he had not spoken to his dad in over a year. DH told him all the paperwork we had to show to get the house and told him he would have to do a rent to own or something that always doesn't turn out. In the end the YA understood and he said they would save as much as they could, it may not be a house but a mobile home on a lot somewhere. DH and I both agreed we would help him with a down payment if he found something he and the GF could afford. I was expecting fireworks, and I'm glad he didn't get mad.

B: yogurt

L: smoked salmon, ritz crackers

D: taco salad with turkey

I've told DH I was not eating sweets and when he comes back from getting the girl he hands me a cake pop! WTF is wrong with him. I get good intentions but complete sabotage...I gotta work with here!! And then I get mad and yell and then make him feel like an ass when all he does is love me...It's just a bite! Yeah well that bite is like crack cocaine to me.

Did a lot of major cleaning today and I am always amazed at how dirty and nasty two people can make a bathroom...just saying.

Have a great day!

 

Progress as of today: 6.2 lbs lost so far, only 105.4 lbs to go!

Horn_of_plenty on 01/01/2019:
Happy New Year to you too! I think the goals you help the girl with are great. School is everything. She can grow up and have a good job and support herself if she can continue to go to school and hopefully a little college too?

YA i guess will take your help...if you say you'd help him, i guess he appreciates it. i'm glad he didn't get mad about not coming to you. it makes sense what you said to him and the girl. i agree. he really should have finished school, especially if it makes a difference saying he did on job applications and i think you had written awhile ago that a lot of them require HS diploma.

your lunch sounds amazing. love smoked salmon! i bought some today too. is yours the kind that is shiny and thinly sliced. that's what i bought.

at least a cake pop is small. i'd like to have a coffee or decaf coffee with one of those.

have a great day!



innerpeace - Monday Dec 31, 2018

Weight: 0.0

Things have been okay but I only expect them to get worse as the new year rolls in.

Christmas Eve was nice the girl, the YA and his stinky GF were over. I think they had fun, we opened presents and played games. Oh and the two grand dogs were over and ran in and out of the house. I tolerate this.

Backstory - I lived alone for over 15 years. I had no problem living alone. I had a sister and three nephews who were all homeless at one point and time. They did not live with me. They have an extrovert lifestyle where they always need to be the center of attention and always be around people. This is not me. I would rather be alone. It has taken me half of my life to learn that this is OK. I am an introvert and I enjoy being alone, doing my thing.

So now...the YA has asked my DH if he could live with us for a few months...while they save money and buy a house. Are you freakin' kidding me. I...just NO. This is not going to work in my eyes. I had to show W2s and pay stubs for two consecutive years or longer to get a house. This YA does not have a pay check, he works for his mother who may or may not pay him and his stinky GF who gets SSI for something (she seems just fine to me). She gets about 750 a month plus 190 in food stamps. They will gladly pay one utility and offer up the food stamps if they can stay. WTF!! It's not a money thing, its a sanity thing plus with two dogs running in and out thay may or may not be potty trained. I just can't have this chaos, constant chatter and noise around me. And then to come home after work and see them laying around, doing nothing with dirty dishes in the sink would absolutely make me explode. This, this will have to be worked out...without either my DH or me feeling like a total ass with the outcome.

I didn't drive to Georgia to see my son, I just felt I couldn't make the trip by myself. The girl was going to drive down with me, but she can't help drive and I just didn't want to venture out on my own, for safety reasons. We may attempt this during spring break in March.

Still no word on my job. I have to go in Wednesday for 4 hours and shut things down, but I can't stay longer than four hours. This is worrisome. We have money in savings, however, I didn't want to use savings money for monthly bills. We will have to tighten down the budget until this bullsh!t is resolved with the 'wall'.

I have been snacking a lot, that's expected during the holidays, but I have been extremely stressed.

My team lost which blows.

My professional team lost also blows.

No if only I can lose as well!! haha.

DH made prime rib for Christmas dinner, mashed potatoes, sweett potato casserole, dinner rolls, green been casserole and brussel sprouts. It was all tasty.

Christmas DH and I had left overs.

Wednesday I get the girl, we go shopping and I made dinner, but I cannot remember what the hell I cooked. I also had chocoloate covered mini donuts - too many

Thursday - salisbury steak, mashed potatoes, gravy, brocoli - chex mix

Friday - pizza, chicken fingers, salad - there was mozzerella sticks, but I did not eat these

Saturday - we were out and ate at a sandwich shop - 1/2 Monte Cristo and 1/3 of my fries

Sunday - 1/2 Monte Cristo, pulled pork sandwich, chips and dip - too many

So now it is Monday the start of something constant:

B- maple cheerios

L: chex mix

D: Chinese Food - chicken and brocolli, rice, peanut chicken and whatever DH decides he will get.

We have also taken down all the Christmas decorations and moved the family room around for - exercise. The TV was moved to the top of the mantal, so we have lots of space now..

No plans for New Year's Eve - hope it comes in softly with the wind and rain.

Happy New Year to all of the DDer's. May this year bring you success, inspriation, motivation and continous loss.

IP

 

Where is BearCountryGG - Did I miss something? Miss her.

graindart on 12/31/2018:
Would hate to be in your situation.

This is the start to a bad movie. The way this movie plays out is the people moving in never leave and never contribute anything except additional burden / anxiety. The ending to this movie is that the real owners finally just move away because they realize that the freeloaders will never leave.....

Thankfully a movie only lasts 2 hours. I'm guessing your real life house guests will be there a good deal longer.....


Donkey on 01/01/2019:
I echo the observations above ^^^. (Gains' analogy to a 2-hour movie made me chuckle.) First, yes, what Bear said, they would not be able to qualify for any mortgage, at least from what I see/know from my job, so BUYING a house isn't really in the cards for an endgoal. Second, while there may be good intentions going into such an arrangement, I see those "let's save money" intentions falling by the wayside quite rapidly and evolves into "we have extra money, let's spend it."


graindart on 01/01/2019:
After reading Donkey's note above, maybe there's a solution that would work for everyone. If you're pretty sure that them moving in is going to happen with or without your complete blessing, maybe you can convince your DH to set some requirements / boundaries that must be complied with prior to the move-in? I'm thinking they need to let you see a written plan of how much they intend to save and for how long of a time period. In writing. If they need $5k for a downpayment and are only planning on saving $200 per month, that'll take over 2 years to accomplish (much longer than my level of patience would last). If a written plan and time-table was reasonable and attainable, I'd push for all of the savings to be put in an account controlled by you & DH monthly so you knew that it was actually happening and also wasn't going to suddenly disappear.

I'm all for helping family / friends better themselves. But part of the process is setting realistic goals that are attainable over a reasonable time period. If they can't make up a simple written plan that includes savings and a defined time period, I guarantee they can't handle buying and maintaining a house of their own.



innerpeace - Friday Dec 21, 2018

Weight: 315.4

Interesting chain of events....

governement shut down - no AL, no visit to Georgia...I will sit in my office and can litterally do nothing....so I guess I'll just wait and see what happens. Having issues with the games politicians play, especially when it effects my work.

The girl and I went to Chipolte and took it home. I ate half my burrito bowl. I have the rest for lunch today.

The YA and his stinky GF (she did smell this day - I can't figure out if it's actaully her or the nasty damp, smokey smell on her clothes - the girl smells like this when I pick her up from her grandma's house most of the time), and they brought their two dogs. (A treeing hound dog - Daisy and a soft little dog - I forget what kind she is - Bambi). Steve ran around the house playing with them. The YA came to pick up some frozen pre-made hamburgers we had in the freezer. They stayed about 20 minutes and left.

DH gets home and we start going to bed about 11:30, however, sometime during the 20 minutes those other two dogs were in my house, one of them, decided to take a p!ss in the middle of my bed. I was so mad. DH and I then spent the next half hour changing sheets and cleaning. We have had Steve 5 years now and he has never peed on the bed...EVER!!

Should be a low key weekend, a few more shopping errands to run, but we are ready for the Christmas!

Have a great Friday...IP

 

Progress as of today: 6.2 lbs lost so far, only 105.4 lbs to go!

legcramps on 12/21/2018:
Ugh, that work situation sucks! But what really sucks is when you're all ready to hit the sack and you have to spend an extra 20 minutes cleaning; so sorry your night was spent in that way; I sure hope you let YA know - they shouldn't be allowed in the bedroom when they visit.


Donkey on 12/22/2018:
Not good all the way around.


Horn_of_plenty on 12/23/2018:
i have a couple stinky married friends. they do not wash their clothes until a month after wearing some of them. they wait till they go to visit their parents on Long Island (they live in NYC) and do all the laundry at the parent's house. LOL i could never...some of my friends once told them they thought they smelled and they were offended. so now we just hope they try to "work on it" sometimes they do sometimes they don't. so gross.


Horn_of_plenty on 12/23/2018:
i'm sure her entire mom's house wreaks. and i'm so sorry about Stevie, is he ok??


Donkey on 12/29/2018:
Thinking of you a lot lately, with the shutdown. I hope you are OK. (((hugs)))



innerpeace - Thursday Dec 20, 2018

Weight: 315.4

We had our work luncheon and it was fun and some just can't deal with the fact things change once they retire. One just had to point out all the things I missed doing. Where are your signs...(in my head - you know where the office is) oh well, I just didn't think we'd need them this year. And I was berated for not inviting the wives of two of the past retirees who have died in the past few years...that is my bad. I called last year and invited one of them to the luncheon and she talked to me 45 minutes about her husband's last days. This was so out of my comfort zone...I didn't even know him. Ok, so next year I will invite the widows of the retirees who died.

I was more than glad when it was over. Set up and clean up and I was more than ready to go home. I get home and fall asleep on the sofa. 4 1/2 - 5 hours of sleep ain't cutting it for me. DH didn't put anything out for dinner, so I defrosted some rotisserie chicken and made a BBQ chicken pizza and once it was finished I ate one piece and went back to sleep.

I go to bed about 10:30 and wake up at 3:00 with a pounding headache. Steve and I go downstairs and I sleep in the recliner until 5:00.

B: maple, brown sugar oatmeal, vanilla iced latte

L: left over pizza, 2 x 2 brownie, meltaway cookie

D: the girl wants chipoltle.

This day is going super slow and I just want to go home.

 

Progress as of today: 6.2 lbs lost so far, only 105.4 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 12/20/2018:
I've come to the conclusion that we can never please everybody so there is no sense in trying.


graindart on 12/20/2018:
Mmmmm pizza. Probably my favorite food ever. Hard for me to limit myself to only a piece or two, when I'm used to eating 1/2 to a whole pizza depending on size.

Pizza Ranch and Qdoba (like Chipotle) are two of the restaurants I've been craving. We don't have either, but our roadtrip takes us be many of them...... Super easy for me to overeat at either, so we'll see how it goes for me and my self control.....


Donkey on 12/21/2018:
What Bear said... 100%.


Horn_of_plenty on 12/23/2018:
lol i wouldn't take any of the retired persons' comments to heart. they have a TON of time to think about things since they don't work!

listen, you did a good job. nothing can always be perfect to the T. you did your best and that's all that matters!

i agree 100% on Bear and Donkey's thoughts. You can do your best and learn from any challenges...that's the best you can do and you should be proud of yourself.



innerpeace - Wednesday Dec 19, 2018

Weight: 315.4

Talked to son last night, he is not coming up so sadness!

So I talked to DH and though he can't get off work, I am still driving to Georgia, the girl asked her mom and she will be coming along as well. It will be a quick trip - down on  Thursday 12/27 and back on Saturday 12/29. The girl has to be back at her Mom's Sunday by 6:00 pm.

At the store i was tempted to buy something already prepared from the deli, but the girl reminded me about her chicken alfredo, so ok. I made that...and the banana budding, cleaned up the kitchen. Didn't eat the banana pudding but had golden oreos instead. It is official, just reconfirming...I CANNOT have this stuff in the house. It is better to deprive than to binge.

Wednesday oh Wednesday - stuck in a traffic jam getting to work, was about 25 minutes late.

And then I get a call from the VA...I have to have another mammogram, new calcification is showing up and they need to examine it closer. OK, but not what I needed to hear this morning.

B: frittata, iced vanilla latte

L: stuff at work

D: TBD

HOpefully things will get better as the day passes. Have a great evening! IP

Progress as of today: 6.2 lbs lost so far, only 105.4 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 12/19/2018:
Calcifications are common........I have them too...and I'm still around after all these years.....Personally I'm more afraid of the x rays than I am of the calcifications.....How nice that the girl can go on the trip with you.....


graindart on 12/19/2018:
I have to keep as much junk as possible out of the house. If it enters the house and I see it in the pantry or elsewhere, all I do is think about it until I finally give in and eat it. When it's not in the house, I'm usually fine.

As long as it's not in the house even if I have a craving, I really don't want to get dressed to go to a store, drive there, shop, and go home again. So my laziness overrides the craving on most occasions.


horn_of_plenty on 12/19/2018:
wait! doesn't deprivation lead to binge? oh....i got you! if you don't have them in the house, you won't binge. yup :)

maybe you can buy some fresh fruit to enjoy at home? with some herbal tea? do you like that?? :) have a good eve, InnerP!


Donkey on 12/20/2018:
I've been in your shoes: somethings I just cannot have in the house or they will be gone. This year, I've been able to temper/moderate this a bit, so there is hope that it doesn't always have to be like that. But ya know what? If it has to be like that, then so be it. And I can completely understand how golden Oreos would fall into that category!



innerpeace - Tuesday Dec 18, 2018

Weight: 315.4

Left work and went to the mammogram appointment. It is never as bad as I make it out to be, it's just the hassle. I don't know if this is more uncomfortable for smaller breasted women, but I just don't like it and it makes me uncomfortable having others (uninvited) manipulate my breasts, and then slap my hand away when I'm only trying to help move or posiition it where they want it to be. Torturous procedure. So I stand there, lean in, lift up, shoulder back, chin up, hold my breath, whatever is needed and I even said thank you!

Get home and took a 45 minute nap, which turned out to be a mistake come bedtime. I don't think I got to sleep until after 1:10 - that was the last time I looked at the clock.

Cooked some potatoe roll, however, the potatoes stuck to the baking sheet so it turned out to be more of a potatoe scramble with spinach and creamcheese and ground beef and it was ugly. It tasted better than it looked.

Today I get the girl, we have to stop by the store and get bananas for the pudding I am making for the Christmas Luncheon at work tomorrow. Told the girl I would make her chicken and brocolli alfredo, as this is what she wants.

Haven't heard if my son will make it up or not, however, if he doesn't, I have already planned to drive to Georgia and drop his Christmas off, the girl will probably come with me and we will just make it a road tirp. I won't have to be back to work until 1/2/19.

B: fritatta, french vanilla latte

L: leftover potato, spinach roll

S: balanced breaks

D: grilled chicken alfreado with brocolli

Day 26 of no pop, so I can stick to something, now just to incorporate this practice into other things.

Progress as of today: 6.2 lbs lost so far, only 105.4 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 12/18/2018:
Congrats on the loss!!! And on staying away from the pop!!!


Donkey on 12/18/2018:
Wow, I had no idea you were working on a no-pop streak -- way to go!!!!


Horn_of_plenty on 12/18/2018:
lol i'm sure MANY women feel just like you do...and in a few more years i'll have the "pleasure" of experiencing a mammagram too! on a brighter note, you will not need to do it again for a year? so that's good.

ohhh...so you like to make banana pudding dessert too? my coworker loves to make this! her sons love it too and she once made it for the office. it's so tasty!

that's nice to make what she wants sometimes :) also, will she be making the banana pudding with you?

that's so nice the girl may come for the road trip! at her young age, it's a nice experience! maybe you can stop somewhere to walk around / outlets / park / experience ...or maybe there may not be time i realize! either way, i'm glad she's joining.!

GREAT JOB ON NO POP!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

i had an egg omelette today with turkey and it was such a great change of pace!!!!!! i thought of it when i saw you had a frittata!


graindart on 12/18/2018:
'nana puddin' is one of my favorites. Like mine with some crumbled pie crust or nilla wafers.

Good job on the pop. That would be one of the hardest things for me to give up right now.



innerpeace - Monday Dec 17, 2018

Weight: 315.4

Had a pretty good weekend.

Up early Saturday, started wrapping presents, but soon stopped...just because. Watched sappy Christmas movies. Showered, dressed and went to DH's work party. It was ok, we had fun. I was really amazed at all the young people at this party, though we weren't the oldest, we were on the old end of the minority. DH did win a golf gift basket that he has no idea what to do with. He said I could give it to my boss.

Dinner there was roast beef, salad, spoonful of chicken alfredo, mashed potatos and then cheese cake for dessert. It was all descent.

Just listening to DH talk to his work people was interesting.

The girl was at her grandma's house while we were at the party so we stopped and picked her up on the way home. We got home about 11:30 pm. In bed by 12:30.

Sunday finally finished wrapping the presents and did the laundry. B: fritatta, L: beer brat D: pork chop, baked potato, salad

The girl didn't want to go home, so she asked if she could stay and have DH take her to school this morning. I told her that would be ok. Then she told me she was going to tell her mom that she had an appointment. I told her not to lie. To just tell her the truth that she wanted to stay, it would be best for everyone involved to NOT lie about anything. She said, mom lies to me all the time. I told her to be the better person and if she started to lie now she would get into the habit and that isn't good for anyone in the end.

She asked her mom if she could stay and the mom said...NO. So now the girl is upset and sad that she can't stay. I just don't understand the mom and her thinking process. I say this because when my son was this age, he opted to go live with his dad. Of course I was hurt, but I just wanted my son to be happy and let him go. So when I see the girl's mom be selfish like this I just don't understand it.

Today I have an inordinate about of sadness and depression and this I just can't seem to get rid of and so close to Christmas...no good for me at all.

DH is half way crazy - he told me I could have the golf basket for my boss and then in one day and one night he has tried to give it to everyone else, he even asked his son if he wanted to go play gold...the YA said I don't know how, I just know you hit the ball around. So now I wonder, why he told me I could give it to my boss but yet he tries to give it to everyone else and or/sell it for a profit, so why does he tell me one thing and do something completely different? This puzzles me. So this morning, i just left it on the island and came to work. I didn't even say anything about it. It's not mine, so as far as I'm concerned it can sit there and rot.

Today I have a mammogram...seriously there is NO way I will NOT put on deoderant or powder this morning...so I will deal with this when I actually get to the appointment at 2:30.

Just another typical Monday for IP! Have a great day.

Progress as of today: 6.2 lbs lost so far, only 105.4 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 12/17/2018:
Good advice about not lying.......It is unfortunate that she asked her mom....maybe the next time she could call her Mom and say..."I'd like to stay at dads tonight and he will drop me off at school in the morning".......she is learning a lot from you....she is almost grown...it will serve her well. It is a common time of year to be depressed......a lot of people are. My guess about the golf stuff is that he was throwing out ideas....and then continued to come up with ideas....probably not a good idea to mention it to your boss......until hubby brings your boss up again...I agree...let it sit there.


graindart on 12/17/2018:
Don't shoot me for giving a possible other side to the mom / daughter situation. I obviously don't know anything about either of them, but here is what bothers me when dealing with similar last minute things:

I'm a person that likes most things planned out when possible. I actually enjoy spur of the moment changes or surprises as long as they're not the normal trend.

My parents rarely plan things out in advance. They usually give me a call and want to do something with their grandkids that same day or maybe with one day advance notice. They also don't usually have any kind of idea on how long something is going to last. If this was a once in awhile thing, I'd understand, but it's a normal pattern.

The spur of the moment plans with no known length of time is great for the ones involved, but sucks for those not involved. In my case, parents call up and want to take the kids somewhere and don't know how long it will be. So if I let them go, I need to change the plans I had with the family and also scramble to find something to do without them or just sit around and feel like I'm wasting a day. If my parents had asked to take the kids a week in advance at a certain time, that would've been fine. Because then I could've scheduled something for myself during that time (with or without wife).

So back to your situation. If the mom is like me, there's a chance that she wouldn't care about stuff like that as long as it was planned ahead. Maybe it's just the sudden changes to schedule that irritate her. I know that's what drives me nuts with my parents. If they scheduled things out further, I'd allow my kids to do more stuff with them. But because of the last minute calls be typical, I often times just tell them "no". (And "yes", I have let me parents know about this.)

innerpeace on 12/18/2018:
I get where you are coming from and I appreciate what you say. It's just this woman is so selfish and all she is concerned about is 'her time', not what the daughter wants.

My husband was like this at first but after the first year, he finally started to understand, it isn't what is best for him or his exwife, it has to be what is best for their daughter. She still doesn't get it.

We will ask her weeks in advance to change the schedule and she will just flat out say - this is my time. She is the resident parent and most time is hers, she won't even allow for additional days during the summer, she is just mean and manipulative and hurtful.

If this wasn't the norm and from past behavior, I would understand, but she always says NO, that is why the girl wants to lie, so maybe one day she will say yes. I didn't want her to get into that habit of lying just to get her way.

We will ask to change the schedule weeks in advance and her reply is always 'we have plans'. When we get the girl again and asked if she had fun or what her plans were, her reply is the same. We had no plans or we didn't do anything. The exwife is just spiteful and doesn't want to let the girl have any extra time with her dad or maybe me...I don't know.


horn_of_plenty on 12/17/2018:
Either re-gift the golf gift OR sell it slightly under (including shipping - work it out) on ebay or facebook local...

grrrr...you mention cheesecake and it's a reminder i have failed to get my cheesecake in the works the past two weekends (chose to relax instead both weekends instead of rushing with it....ah well, it'll happen :)

with your frittata, i should go back to more egg things, like "egg muffins" premade to bring to work for breakfasts....YES! this would also be good for the new year!...instead of low sugar baked goods haha...

well, you did the right thing with the girl and not lying...perhaps there's a way she could get her mom to say yes, and not be a lie...maybe brainstorm on how you could get the mom to say yes...like, hmmm...i have to think about this later..

are you feeling stressed and sad and depressed bc of the mammogram? i hope you feel better later today xoxo...you can do this. you are capable of awesome things. don't put yourself down. sounding like donkey's other entry a bit!

maybe look into some foods good to increase positivity...salmon, avocado, garlic, onions, ginger...green tea (even decaf i like better - they sell it for the keurig), saffron (just a little this stuff is whack!...i use the tiniest amounts)...black pepper....list goes on...

my approach for this end of the year going into 2019 is trying to eat better...for my health, strength, mental clarity.


graindart on 12/18/2018:
So with the additional info you noted in your reply above, it sounds like it's a frustrating situation to be in. And unfortunately one that doesn't appear to have an easy way to change. Stinks being stuck in a difficult situation where you just have to deal with what's available to you.

But good job telling her not to lie to her mom to get her way. That would most likely just lead to an even more negative situation in the future.



innerpeace - Friday Dec 14, 2018

Weight: 315.4

I left work last night and headed to the girl's school for her band concert. In spring when I went it was Administrative Professional's day and I gave her a box of candy. So keeping true to form, I stopped by the drug store and got her a little box of candy, a bell necklace and some gum she can chew with her braces on. When I get to the school, her mom, grandma, step-sister, the YA and his stinky GF was there. They waved for me to come up to the front row with them. This is awkward to me, sitting with the ex-wife. They are nice enought, but really...I know the things, so it is hard to be cordial, but I was. The concert was good and I was happy to leave.

I got home and put the chili together for work and you know...meant to do things, but it just doesn't happen when you're tired. As with HOP I will have to work on my schedule in the new year, because 5 1/2 hours of sleep a night, is just not cutting it for me.

Had chili at work today for a guy who is retiring, I can't wait until it's my time...less than 10 years...if I can make it.

Christmas shopping is complete! I'm so grateful for online shopping!

Tomorrow I will go with DH to his company Christmas Party, the girl will be with her grandma.

Sunday, there may be time for rest...after laundry of course.

Still haven't drank pop...day 21. Happy about this and my skin is doing better.

B: bacon spinach frittata

S: granola cups

L: chili, corn casserole, small piece of cake with nasty icing I had to scrape off.

D: I have no idea - will probably go out with the girl there are beer brats thawed but I don't think I want these for dinner.

present wrapping scheduled for todnight!

Have a great weekend. IP

Progress as of today: 6.2 lbs lost so far, only 105.4 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 12/14/2018:
Good job all the way around!!!! And an especially good job being cordial to the ex .........and personally...i don't think I have EVER met frosting to nasty to scrape off!! Go You!!!


horn_of_plenty on 12/14/2018:
That's very kind of them though...to offer you to come and sit with them! i miss seeing band concerts and kids perform :)

yeah, you will feel sooo much better with more sleep. me too...aside from this month of December,i WAS sleeping well for a lot of this year...just this month because of the busier work schedule.

Yeah, online shopping has got to be the best thing since sliced bread!

your food looks amazing.

i saw a bier brat wrapper in the open garbage in the recycling area of my building...i want to buy those soooo badly!...never had them!



innerpeace - Thursday Dec 13, 2018

Weight: 315.4

Picked up the girl, I wasn't going to but after readying comments I realized I was being the problem. I remember my mom asking me - do you know why you argue? I think I was arguing with DH before we got married. I of course said NO. She said you argue because you don't get your way. I seem to forget that often. Though I wasn't arguing i was just upset because something didn't happen the way I thought it should.

Anyway, when I picked up the girl last night, she asked, am I going to get my head bitten off? I said of course not, I just need a hug. She apologized and everything is fine.

I made grilled chicken, green beans and some boxed scalloped potato that I will never use again.

I also have my dog on a less eating plan. He no longer has a bowl of food on the floor for him to munch on all day everyday, instead he just eats two times a day and has two treats (cookies). He is starting to put on a little weight and i love that dog so much I want him to be around for awhile.

DH ordered the granite counter top this afternoon, cabinets will be delivered 1/8/19.

I've been having a weird pain in my chest/upper adomen area, I might have to get this checked out if it persists.

supposed to go to DH's company Chirstmas party on Saturday the girl is going to her grandma's house, still on the fence about going.

B: bacon spinach fritatta

L: smoked salmon, crackers

S: balanced breaks

D: I don't know yet.

Have a great night! IP

Progress as of today: 6.2 lbs lost so far, only 105.4 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 12/13/2018:
yummm to your smoked salmon!

yeah, i'd say just plain commumincation with girlie should fix most things...i'm in your boat though, i always expect more :)

i really hope this pain of yours goes away...try some deep breaths if you feel stressed?

i'm really glad the issue with girlie has passed <3

and i cannot wait to see the new cabinets installed!!!


BearCountryGG on 12/13/2018:
Love salmon too! I'm glad to hear that you hugged it out!!! You are probably the most influential person in her life......she really does need you and I'm glad you ladies made up.


graindart on 12/13/2018:
Just had smoked salmon a week ago and didn't like it at all. I remember loving it as a kid, so I try it every year or so.....only to remember I really don't like it anymore. Like it cooked / grilled, just not cold smoked anymore.

The smoked salmon thing is a little weird to me, because as I get older I think the foods I like have expanded greatly to include lots of things that I didn't like as a child. So to have something that I enjoyed when I was younger and really don't like now is different.


Donkey on 12/13/2018:
That was very nice to read about the girl and how that worked out :)


Donkey on 12/13/2018:
Along the lines of what Gains said, I now like molasses, and I think fruit cake is the yummiest dessert I've ever had that isn't chocolate. Yes, I'm OLD!


legcramps on 12/14/2018:
So glad you and the girl are getting along again! And yes, I would definitely get that pain in your chest looked at sooner rather than later...stress can sometimes be so debilitating!



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