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innerpeace - Monday Mar 26, 2018

Weight: 303.7

Getting back into a schedule. Work is still very intense and there is still lots to do there.

Home front is different. DH eats dinner when he gets home about 8:15 and then he is ready to go to bed by 9:30 and he ends up getting back up and sleeping in his recliner because of acid or heart burn or something - so this isn't working for him. I have also been waiting to eat with him and this is very NOT good fo me, so I will have to work something out here.

We haven't had the girl in two weekends because of DH's wonky schedule, but we have her this weekend, which is Good Friday and Easter. I have chosen this Sunday (Easter - April 1) to start the C25K back up.

The last two weeks have been just not on program, not on any plan and of course I have gained weight. However, I have just accepted this will be my life long mission, as much as I think about it and start over again, I could have losed thousands of pounds by now, but I will just keep trying.

I will be back on here regularly after my short relapse.

have a great day! IP

Progress as of today: 17.9 lbs lost so far, only 93.7 lbs to go!

Horn_of_plenty on 03/26/2018:
I have a suggestion with girlie...that she does partake in your exercise program too. just an opinion really. growing up, i didn't do much exercise until i joined track in 11th grade and my family didn't do much exercise together either and i wish we did.

we also just didn't do many activities out...but you do - all the arts and crafts and all...girlie is so lucky to have you as her loving caretaker. And this is just one reason why...amongst all the others. i just think it's so good to get her out of the house.

one thing my parents also didn't do is make me work - i sorta wish they had me get a part time job 1x a week at least on weekends...idk. just my thoughts.

bearcountrygg on 03/26/2018:
Glad t see you are back...I couldn't stay away either...I had to just decide to make time for Dd...because I was seriously going off the rails food wise......there may be a few where I'm not here...but they will be brief. It is my life long mission too......apparently it's not going to fix itself.

innerpeace - Wednesday Mar 14, 2018

Weight: 303.7

Telehealth is NOT over, but talking to the coordinator, I told him I need a 2 week repreive. He said OK. It will be turned off from 3/19/18 - 3/30/18 and then I am supposed to rededicate myself to the program. I'm sure this break will help. I told him between work and weighing every day I was getting stressed out, especially when I do everything I should and don't lose weight. He throws around words like, menopause, age, the older you get and crap like that!! Well, maybe it's because I don't make healthy decisions and don't watch portion control, but hey that's just my reasoning.

Pain in butt/thigh is much better today and I figured out what/why it was hurting so there's that! Note to self: think twice before scrubbing the shower with the scrubber under your foot moving your leg back and forth. I was on my hands and knees at first, but that became painful so I just stood up and used my foot. I guess this inflamed a muscle that isn't normally used, which was pressing on the sciatica - so says chiroprator, however, it makes lots of sense now!

I picked up the girl because DH was working and wouldn't you know her book report is due on Friday and she hasn't really even started it. So I guess I will be assisting with the book report on Thursday since this type of activity cannot be done at the residential parent's house for reasons that are illusive - oh because she doesn't do homework help or something!

I grilled baked chicken with parmsean and garlic seasoning, green beans and rice a roni, which has tons of salt, which reflected on my fingers, ankles and scale...oh because I'm a woman and my body does this...so says telehealth coordinator.

DH is dragging after the first 12 hour shifts. He gets home, eats, showers and tries to stay awake but is usually asleep before 9:15...poor thing, he says he likes his job though, so that's always good.

And the sun will rise tomorrow.

Have a great day! IP


Progress as of today: 17.9 lbs lost so far, only 93.7 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 03/14/2018:
Sciatica is awfully painful. I feel for you!

horn_of_plenty on 03/15/2018:
i think it's great that you assist her on her hw...

my parents helped me a bit up until middle school years, but in high school i was basically more on my own. my work ethic wasn't great though...and perhaps my parents should have given me more grief when i got C's in math in 10th grade...i ended up being tutored and got an A but just saying...then again, maybe it really didn't matter...

at least you are helping her so that she can move on after hs and go to college or get a good job.

innerpeace - Tuesday Mar 13, 2018

Weight: 303.7

Just back for a minute. Schedule is wonky since DH started working his 12 hour shifts - the girl nights have changed the girl weekend has changed so we had her two weekends in a row.

Work is stressing me out. The safety inspection that was scheduled for June has now been moved up to April 3...this is not good. We are rushing trying to get things done and this leaves little time for posting.

I've also taken over additional duties facilities maintenance and vehicles due to people retiring, so i've been on a training/learning gig for the last week, pretty busy.

I think telehealth is over...I'm ok with this.

For two days now I've had a cramp like pain in the middle of my left butt cheek that radiates down the back of my thigh, this is driving me insane. I have taken tylenol hoping it will help, if not I have a muscle relaxer.

Will be back on some routine/plan in the next day or so.

Have a great night! IP

Progress as of today: 17.9 lbs lost so far, only 93.7 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 03/13/2018:
yes, if telehealth didn't do much for you, i'd say you gave it a huge try. i'm sure you learned something from it...

maybe you have sciatica in your thigh / butt. maybe stretch / self massage it?

maybe you need more potassium ?

good luck with work, the craziness i am sure will pass!

good to see you passing thru here.!

Donkey on 03/13/2018:
Sounds like sciatica to me. There are great stretches on YouTube that you can do for sciatica. I hope you find some relief. Been there, done that, no fun whatsoever.

happy-1 on 03/14/2018:
OW. Maybe L-glutamine for muscle recovery? A little HMB to cover your muscles like kevlar?

innerpeace - Tuesday Mar 06, 2018

Weight: 303.7

Got home and put the spaghetti on. I was peppering the ground beef and pepper wasn't coming out so I squeezed the container harder and the other side of the lid popped open and a 1/4 cup of pepper fell into my ground beef. I scraped as much out as possible but it was still really peppery after. This is not the first time this has happened. It is just not safe for me to pepper anything.

D: spaghetti with meat and sauce and garlic bread

I had fudge stick cookies for dessert...because they were there.

DH fell asleep by 8:30 because this is just what he does when he is working. I play a stupid hamburger game the girl downloaded over the weekend. No mention of the gym whatsoever.

Was up at 5:00, DH left about 5:45 and I was left to put dinner on. We decided last night we would have a pork roast in the crockpot! DH told me he got the pork out and put it in water so I could get the plastic wrapping off, he also got the crock pot out and he leaves.

Now I'm trying to get this roast in the crock pot. I struggled getting the plastic wrap off. I couldn't find the pepperoncini that goes in the crock pot, looked all over for those. Then couldn't get the jar opened. Once opened the juice sloshed all over me and I dumped it in the crock pot. The peppers were stuffed in the jar so tight I took my finger and gouged them out. Once I had all the spices in I turned on the crock pot and went to eat breakfast.

B: maple brown sugar mini wheats

L: left over spaghetti, yogurt, black berries

S: balanced breaks

Somewhere in between breakfast and driving to work I made the mistake of rubbing my eyes and have been crying ever since. I guess just wiping my hands off from the pepper juice wasn't enough, so my eyes were burning and stinging as well as the skin around my eyes.  I have washed my hands half a dozen times and I still smell that pepper juice.

Priorities...I will get these arranged.

Have a great night! IP

Progress as of today: 17.9 lbs lost so far, only 93.7 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 03/06/2018:
perhaps you need a better container to pour your pepper into!? that is funny.

love all the assortment of different foods in your diet...

bearcountrygg on 03/06/2018:
Neither kind of pepper was your friend today eh?

Donkey on 03/08/2018:
Why not go to the gym on your own?

jayhawkjen on 03/11/2018:
Wow, rough day! If you switched to a pepper grinder it might help

innerpeace - Monday Mar 05, 2018

Weight: 303.7

Well my mind is not on the same page as my heart. This weekend was just not in the category of eathing healthy.

Friday DH made a chicken, pasta casserole topped with Doritos and it was just out of this world - it had cream of chicken soup, corn and roasted tomatoes in it too oh and cheese of course.

Saturday we get up and go to a Pierogi market, we didn't buy the periogies but DH dropped $12 on two loaves of fresh made bread. Then we went to another town so DH could get some Puero Rican food - ossabuckio, pastalitos, pastellies and potato balls. I tried everything except the potato balls because I've tried those before and didn't like them. Just not a big potato fan, mashed, baked or boiled is about all I can stand. Limited french fries, but when you start frying them in and mixing them with other things that is where I draw the line - I don't even like hashbrowns or tator tots. Then we went to see the movie Death Wish - which I liked - but I'm a Bruce Willis fan and there we had popcorn and I ate milk duds.

Sunday the YA and his stinky GF came over and got his birthday present and my mom bought him two hoodies and he wanted a hat from Oklahoma. He brought his two dogs over and they ran through the house with Steve. DH and the girl went shopping and I did laundry. I ate some bread and left overs from Friday.

I had originally planned to eat spaghetti, but I think I'm just going to eat some brocolli and hamburger instead.

DH had his first day of work today - I hope this jobs work out for him.

What can you just say to yourself to make all the right choices, I am really struggling right now.

Have a great night! IP


Progress as of today: 17.9 lbs lost so far, only 93.7 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 03/05/2018:
Congrats on the hubby getting a job! That has to take a load off your mind! About getting into the mindset.......Personally I think I have to hit bottom sometimes....where doing it is easier than dealing with not doing it.

trishpiglet3 on 03/05/2018:
HUGE congrats from me too on your husband getting a job. I hope it goes really well.

I read some books to help indoctrinate myself into healthier eating. My favourite is 'The end of overeating' by David Kessler.

innerpeace - Friday Mar 02, 2018

Weight: 303.7

So made it back from Oklahoma just in time for a snow storm! My dog did great on the trip and was barely any trouble, and I think my mother even enjoyed the dog. Found pet friendly hotels and had a great time. DH and I had to sleep on mom's double bed and we barely fit. Mom says 'just cuddle'! OK well two fat @sses can't really cuddle all night, so we were sleeping on the edge of the bed - I'm so thankful for my kind size bed at home.

DH and I ate out every night, it wasn't a binge fest but I still managed to gain about 5 pounds. I'm just so totally disgusted with weight loss and exercise and health. I'm just resigned to say, some people have it and ohters don't.

DH is excited to start his new job and I will be glad to find some kind of routine for us. So tomorrow starts another day.

We have the girl this weekend and no plans really, but I did want to get out of the house on Saturday, so I will look.

B: maple brown sugar shredded mini wheats

L: left over chicken, brocolli, rice caserole, garlic bread

S: balanced breaks

D: I don't know

I will also be starting the menu planning over, since DH will be working too I will need to get back into the kitchen and I did not miss it one bit.

So here's hoping you all have a great weekend. IP

Progress as of today: 17.9 lbs lost so far, only 93.7 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 03/02/2018:
you have been missed! I will write more later!

graindart on 03/02/2018:
I hate being on a diet too. I'm coming up on a year next month of a mostly successful drop from 283 lbs down approximately 100 lbs. You'd think that after almost a year it would feel more like a 'life change' than a diet, but it doesn't for me. It doesn't come naturally to me. It's a daily decision to work towards my goal. I hate naturally skinny people! (not really, actually I wish I was one)

Horn_of_plenty on 03/03/2018:
with the diet thing...you have it too...! you aren't one of the "dont's!" ...

when traveling and vacationing, it's always a challenge bc it's a change from routine...but now you are back home!

Donkey on 03/03/2018:
The 5 pounds is most likely salt and travel bloat. I tend to gain that much when I travel too, even when I try to stay on program.

I too sometimes get frustrated with the body I've been dealt. Why must it always be a struggle?

bearcountrygg on 03/03/2018:
I get the double bed thing...LOL.....I can take one of them up all by myself...I get my half out of the middle...LOL

innerpeace - Wednesday Feb 21, 2018

Weight: 303.7

So the girl got her phone taken away from her and her facebook account deactivated by her mother. Apparently the girl and her step-sister (independently) were texting boys. My girl admitted and her dad already knew and had talked to her about it before. It is just innocent chit chat. The step-sister was sending pictures, not sure what kind and didn't ask. But instead of dealing with this themselves...the mother and step-dad call the police, for what reason i don't know and wanted the police to take the step-sister to the detension home. Why? These people make no sense to me whatsoever. She's your child - deal with it!

DH took the girl to the doctor. The doctor said she just has dry sensitive skin and gave her some hydrocortozone cream, we will see if that works. She said it could even be her hair irritating it - but no, this is on her legs too, so I'm thinking no! We will see what happens.

So DH starts his job on 3/5/18 and we have decided to go to Oklahoma tomorrow for a short quick trip. If we don't go know we won't be able to go for another year, or I guess I could go by myself. We are taking Steve and I just hope he doesn't hate it too bad.

DH had a taco salad at home when I got home, he picked it up after they were finished with the doctor, it was ok.

Tonight, I guess I will pack and get ready to drive for 16 hours to see my mom, we might stay overnight in IL or MO depending on how far I can drive in one day.

Miss my mom and can't wait to see her, but driving is not my favorite thing to do.

Anyway, I'll post when I can - IP

Progress as of today: 17.9 lbs lost so far, only 93.7 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 02/21/2018:
is girl shaving her legs and arms and ingrown hairs? maybe she's scratching herself.

also, that stinks the mom called the police!!!!!!

bearcountrygg on 02/21/2018:
Have a good trip.

Donkey on 02/24/2018:
I'm predicting that the husband's commute will get real old, real fast. Still, having a job is a good thing.

innerpeace - Tuesday Feb 20, 2018

Weight: 303.7

Just been in a funk lately. The girl was over on the weekend. Friday we went out to dinner to the diner we usually go to.

Saturday we went to Medina (about 25 miles away) to go to the Ice Festival. It was ok, lots of people looking at ice sculptures. Little shops were open and mingling around. We of course bought stuff we shouldn't eat from a bakery. We bought a treat for Steve at the dog bakery and then we went to eat BBQ. Good thing was walking around the town square my back never hurt, which is great in itself.

DH got a job offer from a company outside of Medina so he goes and takes a UA and drops off some paperwork. I am kinda of mixed about it, I hate that he has to drive all the way and he has to work 12 hour days two on/two off/two on/three off rotating days, so he could work an entire weekend or be off an entire weekend (my luck he is working during the girl weekend - UGH). I doubt he will like driving this for the next ten years so I can see it in my future that we will be moving to a location that will be between both of our jobs.

Girl has a skin condition, I don't know what it is. At first I thougth it was fleas and then bed bugs, because it's always all over her arms and legs. We asked her to lift up her shirt and there was nothing so bed bugs were ruled out. I took her last summer for an allergy test and she is allergic to nothing! Anyway, she has nasty rashy, scabby little sores all of her arms we have asked the residential parent (her mother) to get it checked out as she is over ther 3/4 of the time. Alas, nothing....DH is taking her today, to get a cream or something for her, it just looks nasty and unhealthy and gross. Like she could be contagious or something. But the mother is more concerned with who the girl texts than with the grossness on her arms.

We made it to the gym Monday morning and I should have just taken a shower and got the day strated, but DH had a interview and wouldn't get motivated until after the interview, so we lazed around th ehouse until after 2:00 pm, finally we went grocery shopping. And then I get cranky, because I want all the food that I can't have. DH kept asking me if I was hungry. I said no at least three times. I just want it. I want the cookies and ice cream and other yummy stuff that I'm just walking by without putting it in my cart.

Weather is wet and damp just like my mood nad sometimes, I just don't even want to try anymore. It's a long road to hoe!

I didn't count calories.

I will start this again tomorrow.

Have a good night IP

Progress as of today: 17.9 lbs lost so far, only 93.7 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 02/20/2018:
Could be diabetic eczema or a fungal infection. Even something zootropic picked up from pets if she has prediabetes and a lowered immune system.

happy-1 on 02/20/2018:
I know the feeling of being cranky and overwhelmed by all the food I can't have. It made me bail early on a church service sunday to avoid the chocolate cake. I also have a minor meltdown whenever I am faced with taco chips or bread.

bearcountrygg on 02/20/2018:
I'm thinking it might be scabies....contagious. My grandson got it in kindergarten...for the first time in his life he wore jeans with a snap to school...and they didn't know that he was allergic to the nickel in the snap so he scratched his belly a lot...and kept digging it and kept it irritated.the girl next to him had scabies on her arms...and they shared crayons etc...well...the girl itched, transferred it to the school supplies....he itched his allergic belly and transferred the scabies to himself...what a mess they had...when they took him to the drs they found out that he was allergic to his snaps on his pants and he had gotten the scabies in the irritated skin.......they are a type of critter that burrows under the skin and apparently leaves trails. If that is what it is you don't want it and she needs meds to get rid of it.

Maria7 on 02/21/2018:
Hope you are having a good day.

horn_of_plenty on 02/21/2018:
i knew a girl who had some pimples on her arms and she'd scratch and itch them - making her arms appear irritated. the girl might be causing the pain to herself.

innerpeace - Friday Feb 16, 2018

Weight: 303.7

DH had steak, baked potato and salad for dinner. it was very good. It was so nice he started up the grill until the propane went out. And to be honest his steak was better than the one we had for his birthday when we ate out. I only ate 1/2 my steak and I had over 1800 calories for the night.

We were also supposed to go to a health seminar but DH had a headache and we decided to stay home.

In bed by 10:00, up by 4:15 and off to the gym. Stayed at the gym for a little over an hour and did the gym. One thing that aggravates me is I'm doing the circuit training and doing the machines and minding my business and two young kids come in and monopolize the bench press machine - because they want to get pumped before school? Not sure, but they just kept taking turns with the machine so I didn't get that bench press and incline bench press completed because I just mind my business. And I could say, why can't you go over to the free weights and do your bench press, because they had every right to be there. Next time though, i will start with that machine. This has happened twice, so definately use that machine first. Kids!!

Work today is stupid and i wish I didn't have to work, maybe I'll win the lottery or something.

Girl this weekend, not feeling it! We do have an Ice Festival to go to if it doesn't rain, might be fun.

DH had two interviews today and one again on Monday, so things are hopeful that he will be employed soon.

B: English Muffin, peanut butter, iced vanilla latte

L: left over steak, salad

S: yogurt, black berries

D: I think is KFC chicken fingers tonight.

DH has to get back from his afternoon interview, get the girl and take her for a shot (before 3) and then he really didn't want to make dinenr, so we agreed on KFC. and the girl likes KFC.

Have a great night IP.



Progress as of today: 17.9 lbs lost so far, only 93.7 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 02/19/2018:
KFC is fun and chicken fingers aren't Too bad you can always have a salad first ;) that's why I try to do sometimes

happy-1 on 02/20/2018:
Just ask if you can work in a set and if they can spot you. Then ask them for inside tips on how you can get Yelp elite status at the gym ;-)

happy-1 on 02/20/2018:
Just ask if you can work in a set and if they can spot you. Then ask them for inside tips on how you can get Yelp elite status at the gym ;-)

innerpeace - Wednesday Feb 14, 2018

Weight: 303.7

Finally got back on the scale - down 2.3 pounds. I'm ok with this for now. Shoulder muscle is still sore, but I keep stretching it out and it is getting better.

The YA came over and picked up a bed and furniture and some extra dishes and stuff we gave to him to set up house. i hope it works out for him.

Sleeping better but I keep waking up thinking I am over sleeping and I have only been asleep for 1 1/2 - 2 hour increments. I guess I just need to wait and listen for the alarm.

Dinner last night was sausage, eggs and toast. Suprised but it was good.

Tonight we have the girl - really don't doing anything for Valentine's Day. We did get her a stuffed animal and itunes gift card but that is all.

B: toast

S: yogurt, blackberries

L: 1/2 peanut butter sandwich

S: balanced breaks

D: not sure I think DH said something about individual pizza on flat bread.

Have a great evening! IP

and work is really crazy, busy, stressful right now for some reason.

Progress as of today: 17.9 lbs lost so far, only 93.7 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 02/14/2018:
where is YA staying?

innerpeace on 02/16/2018:
He managed to get an apartment with the help of his step-dad. He is supposed to do part-time maintenance in the evening for the other residence. I hope it lasts.

bearcountrygg on 02/14/2018:
Congrats on the nice loss!!!

innerpeace on 02/16/2018:
Thank you

happy-1 on 02/15/2018:
Congrats!!! A very happy Valentine's to you!!!

innerpeace on 02/16/2018:
Thank you

horn_of_plenty on 02/16/2018:
i hope the YA's gig lasts - it sounds good!

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