- Friday Aug 08, 2003
Wow, I can�t believe I haven�t posted in so long. There are tons of new people here, who I don�t recognize. I have been busy in summer school and reading so much; I didn�t have time for myself to even think. My son also returned in June and the last week I have been running around trying to get him enrolled in school. He just finished a driver�s education class and wants to get a car. Great, I�m going to enjoy that, dealing and haggling with used car salesmen has always been on my �to do list� � (implied with sarcasm).
I had to take a physical last weekend and was rudely confronted by a nurse, which I tell myself after the fact, will probably help me in the long run, but during, I was pretty agitated.
Anyway, it was a military event and everything is supposed to be so organized, and I have to say this was. We had different stations to go to, to get checked out: Station 1: fill out paperwork, medical history and any reason why you saw a doctor in the last five years. Station 2: height, weight, blood pressure. Well I had my height and weight measured. OK, its no secret that I�m overweight, that is something you just can�t hide. When I sat down to have my blood pressure taken the nurse said, loudly enough for everyone to hear, �OH yeah, your blood pressure is going to by high, because you are a little overweight.� At first I took this in jest and said, �a lot overweight� and she replied, �well, I was just trying to be polite��whatever. Anyway, my blood pressure was 140-94, which she said was high, so she took it in my other arm, which was 138-92. She told me she couldn�t clear me until the bottom number (I forgot what she called it) was under 90. She told me to go to station 3 and then come back and recheck my blood pressure. Station 3: labs � urine & blood � while I was sitting there waiting, I wondered about the blood pressure incident. How worried should I be and all that. Station 2: The same nurse instructs me to lie down on a bed for a few minutes and think of relaxing things. She starts in with a story about a very obese man who comes in and she just knows that his blood pressure will be high. She takes it and it was within normal limits. She said his cholesterol was only 128. Anyway, after she was finished I asked her if I should be concerned about my blood pressure and if I should consult my primary care physician and get on medication. She then rudely replied�lose weight. I again asked, well if it�s high shouldn�t I see my physician? She said, all you need is diet and exercise and lose weight. Then I was agitated and said, well, that�s not going to happen overnight, do I need to do something in the mean time. She got huffy and said, NO, to just lose weight. Anyway, this went on for a few minutes and continued to get louder, until someone came in to see what the trouble was. OK, I say again, it is no secret I�m overweight, but I was alarmed at the blood pressure thing and don�t want to be having a stroke in the near future. Station 4: vision check Station 5: hearing Station 6: dental Station 7: physical exam � PAP/breast exam (which is never pleasant) Station 8: counseling � drug/alcohol use, safe sex, cigarette smoking, diet/exercise, weight control, HIV and that type of stuff Station 9: civilian doctor Station 10: army doctor
Anyway because of all that, I got back on a diet/lifestyle change kick and want to lose weight and I always got encouragement and motivation from my friends from the DD pages and hope you all welcome me back. I have drill tomorrow and will officially start my �diet� on Sunday. I have to get mentally prepared and just know that this will happen starting Sunday. So on August 10, 2003, I will again start a diet and exercise routine and I will be accountable for the �choices I make�. I�m looking forward to posting regularly again.
Success does not always roar. Sometimes, it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, �I will try again tomorrow�.
Do you best...Jo Ann
- Thursday Apr 24, 2003
I have been busy cramming for a physics test. I will never understand somethings. Physics is one of them. So I just crammed long enough to remember and then spit it out on the test and then, its gone, just like it was never there to begin with.
I was disppointed with my weigh in at weight watchers. She told me not to be discouraged since I had started working out. Yeah, that's easy to say. I finally called my insurance company and got authorization to see a therapist. I really have people/crowd issues not to mention all the self esteem ones. I figure I pay for it, I may as well use it, besides there's no investment like a personal one.
I was supposed to make up the drill I missed at the beginning of the month today & tomorrow, however I just couldn't go today. I tried on my uniform and amazingly it fits better, but it is still to tight. So I am now convinced that exercise works. Sometimes you just have to see actual proof.
I found this great aerobics video, that is the funnest thing I'v ever done it incorporates line dancing and country steps in a great aerobic exercise. I really love it and look forward to doing it.
I hope you all have continued success. Jo Ann
- Wednesday Apr 16, 2003
Wow, you miss a few days and miss a bunch. Welcome to all the new people.
Spent almost 2 1/2 hours at the dentist office, which resulted in an attitude on my part. They asked me to fill out a questionnaire, not the best thing to ask when you make patients wait for 40 minutes. It ask me what they could do to make my visit more pleasant...uhh cut the wait time in half would be a start. The first thing they ask me for when I arrived was my insurance card...sure...I don't have any pain today and yes, I'm fine and yourself? Ok I would appreciate if you treated the patient and not my insurance. And then I learn I might have to get a root canal, but the doctor did say that was the worst case scenario...maybe she watches too much reality TV.
I have been eating so much better...portion control is a God send. I have learned to ask for a to go box and immediately put half of my order in it, eat what's left and take the rest home for another meal. I have learned that one bowl of Fruit Loops can satisfy my craving instead of two or three. I have learned that during exercise the pain is awful, but the feel of satisfaction of actually doing it is amazing. I'm sure there are other things I will learn as I go, but these have made the most impact on me.
Last night was the first night I missed exercising...I struggled with myself, but I know my body was screaming for a break and I'm anxious to pick up where I left off tonight.
I hope everyone has continued success. Jo Ann
- Monday Apr 14, 2003
Sunday marked an entire week of doing some sort of exercise daily. I thought it would get easier, but I thought I was going to die walking in the park. My girlfriend talked the entire way, which is good, because I could only make short grunting sounds to let her know I was still listening. My legs and back were killing me. A bit of inspiration we passed an older gentlement walking the opposite direction and he waved and said hello, and told us to keep on going...on the way back we passed him again and he said that we did a good job and should walk everyday. Afterwards my girlfriend asked me if I noticed that he was holding his right arm. I said NO because I didn't. She told me that the man had a stroke a few years back and it was amazing that this older gentleman was trying to motivate two younger women.
Worked in the yard Saturday and that is my least favorite thing to do. If I had it my way I would spray RoundUp over my entire yard and let the weeds just swivel up and die. Afterwards I did the WATP 3 mile tape and played cards.
Note to self: Do not pee in a toilet that has bleech in it! Things like this you just don't think about until it actually happens, but after getting choked up by the fumes, I recovered and felt pretty stupid and would only tell people who don't know me from a stranger on the street.
I have a dental appointment today and then school...it will be a late night because there is no way I'm going to stop exercising now. I hope you all have a great week. Jo Ann
- Thursday Apr 10, 2003
The quest for the perfect bra is eternal. I have yet to find a bra that I can work out with. I have bras that are too loose and I flop around, which is very uncomfortable, I have bras that are too tight and the minute I move half my boob pops out of the cup and the magic of it all, they are the same size. Of these bras I have some that cut through underneath and slide off the shoulder, and then vice versa. I think I have tried every marketable bra there is, I have added and removed pieces and still can't find something I am comfortable with. I want something specific...something that will prevent myself from getting a black eye but something that will let me breathe at the same time.
I am tired of getting heat rashes in unmentionable places. I normally use cornstarch and then when I sweat I get a nice little paste that is really gross. The good thing is my chest is the first place I loose weight. But now since my treadmill is in the house I can flop around at will.
I hope you all have a great successful day. Jo Ann
- Wednesday Apr 09, 2003
Weight Watchers meeting today...down two pounds. I haven't missed exercising yet. I love the WATP tapes, which I have been doing, late at night after school. I like going to the meeting but the ladies there are the rudest bunch I've ever been around. The leader is talking to us and two or three groups of people will be having their own conversation, drowning out the leader. She doesn't say anything to them...it is aggravating to the point I want to SSHHHH them, but I don't. I figure they are just excited about loosing weight or something.
Last night I went to the Big Lots store looking for straws for a craft project. I walked all through that store and found all the Easter candy and candy that didn't have to do with Easter but I didn't find any straws. Finally I asked the young teenage boy with multiple piercings and wild hair told me they were in the party supplies. Off I go in search of the straws. On my way to the check out I ventured over to the Cadbury cream eggs, they were literally calling my name, 'Jo Ann remember that creamy center you love to lick out and the yummy, smooth chocolately shell?' Yes, I do and I was headed over to get one or two or three but that young boy says, 'I'm open ma'am you don't have to wait.' So I say thank you for keeping me from buying the candy...he just looks at me like I'm weird or something. So I say to myself walking out to the car 'God bless the peircings and wild hair child' who at that time was my personal savior from those wicked, evil Cadbury cream eggs.
I've had this treadmill out in my garage for almost two years. Occasionally I would go out in the mornings, before work, and use it. My excuse was that I would miss the news and I just couldn't do that, so this afternoon I dragged the thing in and parked it right in front of my television, turned it on, turned up the television and walked. So no more excuses. I have a small goal...which is to fit into my uniform again.
My group at school has a new saying...stupid should be painful. So I'm not going to be stupid anymore. I know the ropes, I just have to stick to them. I hope you all have a great day and many more successes. JO Ann
- Sunday Apr 06, 2003
I called my First Sergeant and explained to him my problem. He let me out of drill, however, I have to make it up the 24th & 25th, that's OK, I now have 3 weeks to get into my tight fitting uniform. Thanks Chrysalis for your motivation, I wish they would act like that, but they don't. It's more like avoiding the pink elephant in a room full of alcoholics.
My girlfriend and I walked through the park today. Almost 2 1/2 miles. My legs were on fire and my back ached and ached, but I made it, didn't set any record though. I'll keep walking.
We'll see what this weekend brings. A guy at work gave me an awesome pie recipe that is only 3 points per slice.
1 reduced fat graham cracker crust 1 small box of strawberry/lime sugar free jello (whatever your taste) 2 6 oz. cups of lowfat/fat free strawberry yogart (again whatever jellow you chose) 1 small tub of fat free coolwhip
dissolve jello with 1/4 cup of boiling water (may have to reheat to get it all dissolved. Add two containers of yogart and mix well. Add coolwhip and stir. Pour mixture into pie crust and let set for 1 or 2 hours. Eat.
It tastes really good and is filling if you have a sweet craving and like I said it is only 3 weight watcher points. Enjoy. JO Ann
- Thursday Apr 03, 2003
I went to my weigh in - I lost .8 pound. I really didn't try and I didn't exercise at all - I'm working on that - remember I just realized portion control.
I was having a conversation with another good friend of mine I usually call Dingy (whose brother I was supposed to pick up at the airport last night - but his father-n-law did instead). Anyway we were talking about how our days went and she was saying, what if there are angels (like in City of Angels) that hover around us during the day and that bad day you think you had, well just imagine how much worse it could be if that angel wasn't around. That made since to me and I thought about it and had all these great revelations, but then can't remember them. Sort of like not remembering dreams.
I'm having trouble dealing with the fact that I have to go to drill this weekend. I hate the way I look in my uniform and have issues with it because I know I don't meet the standards. But then again, they know it too and sometimes, I just wish they would say, 'hey, YOU don't meet the standards and you need to make some kind of progress or we'll boot you out' but they don't. So if they let it slide I shouldn't feel so awful, but in my subconscious mind that just gives me permission to keep on keeping on and not doing anything about it. So we are both guilty.
I broke down and emailed my ex-husband's wife. I wrote: I'm just writing to ask how you are doing? I was concerned when I heard about the soldiers missing from Fort Bliss, but I didn't know what unit Bobby is in or what location. I hope all is well and the chances of you deploying are slim. I hope Nicklaus is acting OK for you, and remember if you need anything for him or for yourself, please let me know. (for those of you who don't know - Bobby is my ex-husband who is still active duty military as is his current wife Shirley. Nicklaus, my son, is living with Shirley in El Paso while my ex is deployed)
Anyway she wrote back informing me that she was currently in the 507th Maintenance Company (the company whose convoy was ambused and had soldiers taken as POWs. She told me she new all of those people and they were her friends. She said it was weird for her and unbelievable in ways she would never imagine. She just hopes she doesn't have to go over there anytime soon. My ex though, deployed in July last year on another mission that is different from what is going on in Iraq, so he is safe. My son is doing fine.
Anyway, I hope you all are having a great day - I will be exercising in a way this evening by mowing my lawn. Jo Ann
- Wednesday Apr 02, 2003
This week I made amends with a very dear friend. I feel so much better because it was my fault we didn't speak for 2 years, not that I did anything wrong, I thought I was doing something right. After a conversation we had, she said something I didn't agree with, but kept it to myself. When I got home and thought about what she said, it made me angry, so much so that I never returned her calls or talked to her again for 2 years. I was really missing her, so I called and talked to her and told her I was sorry for being dumb, I really missed her. I love her even more for just picking up where we left off, like nothing ever happened. How often do you find friends who understand and accept you for who you are?
BUT I also had controversy. I work in an office with 9 other individuals and yes, I'm the administrative assistant, the low man on the totem pole, the phone answerer, the copy machine fixer and the fax know hower but damn it I am a person too and when some one just totally disregards that fact, it can really be irritating.
I was the only one in the office when someone comes in, walks directly past me without saying a word and walks all through the office and comes back by and says, 'there is no one here'. I said good morning, but she just walked out the office. If she would have spoken when she first came in, I would have told her I was the only one in the office and saved her the trip of trying to find someone, 'who could help her'. The second time, she came through with someone interviewing for a job. She introduced her to the two people who have desks before mine, walked around me, and introduced her to the rest of the people behind my desk. Never acknowledged me or said anything at all to me. How rude!! So as the longer I sat there the madder I became and when she left I told one of the managers, 'If I'm so insignificant than I just won't come to work tomorrow'. He agrees that what she did was very rude but. I said there is not but, it was inexcusable so don't try to make excuses for her behavior. We talked about it and I still said I was going to take the next day off, just because. Anyway, yesterday she came to my desk and apologized, she said she didn't mean to be rude. I thanked her and told her I appreciated her apology. She was all teary eyed and said, when she was told the situation it probably bothered her more than it made me mad. I doubt it, but anyway, she apologized again and left.
Then I felt bad because she was upset. When I talked to my confidant here at work, she said, that this person is so shallow, she may have been upset because someone actually brought her behavior to her attention, not because she actually regretted it. I do think her apology was heartfelt and will take it as such. I know, I know I'm rambling but I just want you to know...I'm really not angry all the time, just when something conflicts with my emotional self.
Today is my first week weigh-in at weight watchers. I can't stay for the meeting because I have to pick my friend's brother up from the airport - the storage unit he had all his belongings in burned down. He lost all of his household furniture he and his wife have been collecting for seven years. The work on the road and when they find pieces they liked, they would buy it and ship it back here to put inside a house they are building. I guess now they will have to start from scratch...man that bites.
I have other issues, but will talk about those at a later time. My eating is doing better. I finally understand portion control...go figure, that only took 10 years. I hope you all have a successful day. Jo Ann
- Monday Mar 31, 2003
I am certainly going in the wrong direction. I did go an start weight watchers AGAIN. Third time's a charm and just maybe I will stick to it.
I have a problem getting off the couch, if I didn't know better I would say it's magnetized to my butt.
I have worries of being deployed...how scarey...maybe that's why I keep gaining weight. If I get so big, I'd be a health risk and wouldn't have to go, not to mention the fact that I can't wear my uniform. My dad told me to eat pizza and drink beer. Thanks Dad, love your support!
I have to rant...I was at weight watchers and saw a girl I graduated highschool with. I told her I had only been in the area the last 5 years because I had joined the military after school. She asked why I got out...just because I'm FAT. She says, oh you are not. Ok I've just gained 100 pounds and I'm sitting at a weight watchers meeting so DUH.
What does 'results not typical' mean? I see that on every kind of advertisements for diet pills, exercise equipment or new fad for weight reduction. So I'm guessing it really means...comeon sucker...give us your money.
Y'all have a good day.