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innerpeace - Tuesday Apr 05, 2016

Weight: 311.9

DH and I didn't have the left over pork chops. We go to IHOP instead. I wanted pancakes but opted for two eggs and bacon with brioche toast. It was pretty good. I suck though because when DH was picking up his medication he brought me a Hershey bar. We ate it. Way over on calories because of it . Finished with 2296.

Today was difficult at work. I have tons of stuff to do but feel overwhelmed at times, so I find myself just sitting. My boss was out today so that was easier for me to try and relax a little. I organized some stuff and I'm still tossing and shredding stuff that is 15-30 years old...no relevance whatsoever!

Over the weekend I helped the little girl read and study for her AR test for the Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days. We read the book, talked about, went over every part of it. I found a book review quiz online and she took it. Only missing one of the 25 questions. I was hopeing she would take the actual test today at school.  When she gets in the car, I asked her if she took the AR test. She says, No I didn't have the book. OMG I had the book, it was due back to the library. I asked if she needed the book? She said not really...then why the hell did she say that? I told her if she needed the book, we can renew it and she can take it to take the test. Did she or did she not need the book. She said she didn't. Now I don't know. WHy is she like that? it stresses me out!  She tells DH that her mom's license is suspended....I was trying to find out why, but she said she didn't know. That her mom was pulled over. DH says he thinks its because she didn't have car insurance, but I don't know, someone came and picked her up, so I hope she gets home. I mean I know she is going home, I just don't know who is driving her...aunt, uncle, grandma...

B: toast; iced vanilla latte

S: yogurt protein bar

L: roastbeef sandwhich

S: tangerine

D: a recipe for party sandwiches DH found on the book of face. He used ground turkey instead of beef and they turned out pretty good.

The little girl and I were at the library getting another book. We will be reading Diary of a Wimpy Kid, Ramona and Beezus and a Star Darlings book. I read the Diary of the Wimpy kid book this eveing, they make me laugh, because I can see this happening in real famlies. I think it will be a good tool to help the little girl. She can read all she wants, but it doesn't help if she isn't paying attention to what she is reading. That is why I started to read it, to ask her questions....maybe this approach will work.

I  didn't add my calories up yet, I will do it first thing tomorrow.

DH and I decided to try to go to a Y closer to our work. We can go and stay about 45 minutes to an hour and let the traffic die down. We are checking this one out tomorrow. This is the one the little girl will be doing her summer camp at, so we will see.

Hope you all have a great Wednesday!

Progress as of today: 9.7 lbs lost so far, only 101.9 lbs to go!

innerpeace - Monday Apr 04, 2016

Weight: 311.9

Somtimes there are just thoughts bouncing around in my head and today it is no different. So much so it is wearing me out and I know there is stuff I want to do when I get home. I know we need to go to the store, because DH and the little girl did not over the weekend, because DH did not want to run into the monthly shoppers who crowd the stores at the first of the month. But if we don't go, I doubt there will be any lunch stuff for this week.

It is cold out and is supposed to snow again later tonight. Not that I'm a baseball fan, but the season opener was postponed until tomorrow.

We have a lot of stuff in our house. I would like to get rid of some of it, but DH won't let go of it. There is lots of stuff in the garage and shed too, that he won't get rid of. There is a shelf in the shed that has nothing but medicine bottles on it. I can't say why? But why does he keep this crap? 

The fireplace is fileld with burnt ashes, I wanted to get that swept out and clean it up - we will probably not use it anymore until next winter and we are out of firewood.

The little girl has crap all over too. Piled on top of my buffet table. She has her own space, but must take up mine as well. This must change.

There are vegetables in the refrigerator that must be cooked before they go bad, will address this tonight.

B: toast, vanilla iced latte

S: protien yogurt bar

L: smoked salmon, crackers

S: tangerine

D: left over baked pork chops and vegetables (squash & zuccini)


Progress as of today: 9.7 lbs lost so far, only 101.9 lbs to go!

OhioRaven on 04/05/2016:
Have a Peaceful day.

Horn_Of_Plenty on 04/05/2016:
Lol, since moving to my apt 3 years ago, I have thrown out tons of rotten, uncooked veggies lol....

I can relate to your swimming thoughts in your head of what you want to do. I do this too, all the time. Especially when I get too busy like now, but I know it'll end so i'm not getting as worked up about anything luckily...I want to read my book, and everyday I know I have to put it off bc I end up getting too tired at night, lol. looking to read it tonight! ;)

Just remember, you will eventually get to do everything you want to do. Sometimes patience is the real killer :)

innerpeace - Sunday Apr 03, 2016

Weight: 311.9

Was i n bed and realized I did not post today. It was really a relaxing day, just got caught up in stuff.

Woke up to snow. About an inche was on the ground. Was up by 8:30 and showered. Came down and drank the iced vanilla latte and did the Sunday drossword puzzle, watched a few episodes of law and order.

Helped the litle girl with her book review, hopefully she can take her AR test on Tuesday and get 3 points. I think she need 12 or 15 before the end of 4th quarter.

Completed the laundry and picked up around the house.

DH and the little gril went to Toys R Us for a book that the little girl wanted. She used her own money. They brought Taco Bell back for lunch.

Dinner we had baked pork chops and brocolli. I finished the day at 1548 calories. Still would like to see lower than that.

Tomorrow I will be busy at work so I hope the day goes by super fast.

Watched a disapointing episode of the Walking Dead I waited all weekend for...and my SOONERS lost! On a good note though, I didn't expect them to win and have the two teams that actually made in the final game in my bracket. I completed a bracket through the county contest we have, so far I am tied for secondl. If NC wins tomorrow, I may be $40-60 dollars richer! And I paid nothing to enter! very excited about that.

I'm ready for Monday! Have a good night!

Progress as of today: 9.7 lbs lost so far, only 101.9 lbs to go!

hollybelle on 04/04/2016:
1500-160 is very low. Good day!

OhioRaven on 04/04/2016:
Good Post today, except for the Oklahoma thing.

Horn_Of_Plenty on 04/04/2016:
Yuck, snow!? sounds like you may have gotten to bed early. I cannot believe how well I was able to finally sleep thru the night. so nice.

innerpeace - Saturday Apr 02, 2016

Weight: 311.9

Oh good gawd! My weight loss journey symbolizes this game I just watched as my alma mater got crushed in the final four!!

We did get to the Y last nights and my body is sore this day, might go again tomorrow.

Took the little girl to Home Depot for the butterfly house construction. She enjoyed it.

B: multi grain Cheerios

L: hamburger fries

D. Pizza watching basketball

Crap day it snowed and thunderstormed.

Progress as of today: 9.7 lbs lost so far, only 101.9 lbs to go!

innerpeace - Friday Apr 01, 2016

Weight: 311.9

It's official my DH is a total azzhat! OMG He just knows how to make me feel so worthless and insignificant. And I can't believe I let him do this! A few weeks ago I read an article that somewhere in Indiana a company sends used medicine bottles to a thrid world country (I can't remember which country) so they can be used for medicine to give out. As I was walking out the house I notice all the empty vials and bottles sitting on a shelf in the garage. I ask...What are you going to do with all these bottles?

As I was getting in the car DH reaches over and turns down the radio. I ask why are you turning down the radio? He says, so I can hear whatever else you are going to b*tch and complain about. Seriously? What was I b*tching about now? I just asked a question. He really wants me to start...I can.

I can complain everyday about how he leaves water splatter all over the bathroom mirror and how he falls asleep in his recliner every night. Me no, I just let it happen, there is no stopping it...but I can start complaining about it. I can start complaining how I hate that trash piles up in the kitchen trashcan until nothing else will fit before it gets taken out...or I can take it out myself, but what fun woutld that be? I can complain that I have to drive everyday to work, because he freaks out on the interstate? I can complain about lots of other stuff too, but do I? NO? 

We had a few words back and forth and I didn't speak at all going to work, as whatever I say, I will be complaining. I told him to walk home.

He texted me and asked if I was coming to get him? I said No, not unless I get some kind of apology. He says sorry. I asked sorry for what? He says for making you mad. Seriously, fo rmaking me mad? Not for being a azzhat, blow hole, jackazz? Whatever man! I just do NOT want to spend time with this man, this weekend!

We had chipolte for dinner I ate 1886 calories.

This month I am going to lessen these calories, I hate that I am stable and don't see any weight coming off. Tonight, we are going to the Y. I will do some cardio machine, because I am NOT swimming - azzhat (AH for now) and the little girl can swim - I still think it is too cold even for the indoor pool.

B: toast, iced vanilla latte

S: fruit and yogart protein bar

L: smoked salmon, saltine crackers, two halo oranges (are not so sweet and juicy as advertised)

no afternoon snack. I don't know what is for dinner. AH took out pork chops but I doubt we will eat them, i wonder.

Tomorrow, we aer scheduled to go to the Home Depot activity for kids, which I hate but do - again don't complain about it. The little girl is supposed to go to a birthday party at three and then come back. I really don't care if she does or doesn't. I am watching basketball later. GO SOONERS!

I hope you all have a better day today, than I did! trying to find my InnerPeace!

Progress as of today: 9.7 lbs lost so far, only 101.9 lbs to go!

OhioRaven on 04/01/2016:

innerpeace - Thursday Mar 31, 2016

Weight: 311.9

DH and I picked up the little girl. She didn't hardly speak in the car on the way home. She was sniffling. I asked her if she was sick. She says no...just allergies. Well OK then we'll check on getting those fixed up. Since spring is here she will break out in these little bumps all of her hands. She said her mother told her she was allergic to grass. And then come to find out, this is just her mother's diagnosis not a doctor's. 

I know she is very sensitve to other things, she gets big, huge welts whenever she gets mosquito bites and then she itches and scratches until she bleeds and they usually get infected. Last summer dressing her up for her costume week at camp, even markers and other things would leave red puffy marks where ever they come in contact with her skin. I told her I would make her an appointment to see a doctor. She didn't say anything, so I made the comment, unless you want to sneeze and hack all summer long. She still didn't say anything. We get into the drive way and she hops out saying she is going to take a shower and she runs upstairs.

DH grills some steak and I am am making rice and green beans, After dinner DH and the little girl go to the station to get me some gase and she did want an icy.

I did make an appointment for the VA doctor who looks at my face it isn't until 5/9/16 and the labs are on 4/25/16, so maybe I can lose this 11 pounds before I get on her scale. That is my goal for April to be under 300.

DH texts me and tells me that the little girl's mother and stepfather were telling his son that DH owes him $6,000. I'm like OMG for what? You have paid child support ever since they left why would you owe him any money? First the little punk needs to finish school. I know he is DH's son (a spoiled brat) but I don't believe any parent owes their kids anything except, food, clothes, a place to live and the chance to get a good education. Well he pizzed that away already! He's not my son, but again, this son hasn't spoken two words to his dad since I've bee up here (almost three years now)! Whatever! I'm still kinda ticked. This emotional BS makes my DH sad and broody and I don't like it!

Slept pretty good last night, up until the dog woked me up, he has been doing really well...except he started seeing his reflection in the window while standing on the bed and that is what he has been barking at the last couple of nights. So I closed the bedroom drapes and it is total blackness now. Same thing in the dining room while watching TV he'll see the TV reflection in the window and start barking at the people thinking they are outside in the yard, it is kinda strange and cute at the same time.

I finished the night with 2224 calories, again with the bad habits, stupid donuts, with my DH enabler. I told him the next time I ask for something just say NO!

B: bagel with cream cheese, iced vanilla latte

S: mixed berry protein bar

L: salmon, crackers (I have two more days of salmon), fiber one strawberry cheesecake bar

D: I think we are going to Chipoltle, I will get what I usually get and my bowl is around 575-600 calories.

No plans tonight! Should be a relaxing evening. Tomorrow April 1st. Should try to find something to fool these crazies at work....Have a good night.



Progress as of today: 9.7 lbs lost so far, only 101.9 lbs to go!

thinkpositive on 03/31/2016:
Trying to come up with an April fool's joke for my grandchildren. They kind of expect it so hard to fool them.

Horn_Of_Plenty on 04/01/2016:
Allergies are the WORST! I hope she feels better. You know what else is good about smoked salmon!? it lasts a long time in the fridge bc of all the tasty salt it's cured with!

When you say salmon, do you mean the salted one?

innerpeace on 04/01/2016:
I'm not sure. We get it at sames, it just says it is smoked salmon. One was maple bacon smoke the other was regular smoked. It doesn't taste very salty. It doesn't say salted anywhere. It is very good though.

innerpeace on 04/01/2016:

horn_of_plenty on 04/01/2016:
Yeah smoked salmon - love it and yes it's pretty salty I believe.

innerpeace - Wednesday Mar 30, 2016

Weight: 311.9

We have ants! How the hell they get in the house I am clueless. I hate the little buggers! I have talked about the ants before and my DH getting snippy with Scott's lawn service...well we still have the ants so I can't leave food down for my dog during the day. DH wouldn't let me use the lawn service because he said he would take care of it, the bad thing about that it is whenever he feels like it, which may be NEVER! I made a comment that we still have ants as I was washing the dog food down the drain and he says, you can go to Home Depot too JoAnn.

Yes well, I will and you know what I DID! If I would have known I would have had to still take care of stuff like this being married I would have thought twice about it. He forgets I lived alone and owned a home by myself and took care of everything for over 15 years. He doesn't scare me with that macho bullcrap! Hey, guess what? I can mow, weedeat and paint too. You need a sink unclogged I'm your girl! Trash taken out, hey I'm there!  dumb me for thinkin a husband might take over these house chores! bleepity bleep!  I'm trying, I really am!

He did say he would go with, why to make sure I get the right stuff? No, he wanted to pick up the edger he ordered online, we'll see how many times that is actually used this spring/summer!

Tonight is a little girl night. We have nothing planned and she is on spring break, so maybe we will go for a walk. I'm really not in the mood to entertain her though.

Dinner last night was the pesto chicken. DH baked the chicken with pesto sauce, tomato and cheese. It was ok, rice and green beens. Total for the day was 1604.


B: bagel, cream cheese, iced vanilla latte

S: yogurt protein bar

L: smoked salmon, crackers, yogurt

I'm not sure what's for dinner.

Was thinking if my mom don't come up this spring that I will be driving home the last week in July. I really miss my mom and friends. Made an appointment at the VA so I can get my face pill prescription renewed. It isn't until May. I will run out of pills by then, but oh well, They may or may not help the acne. My face as been descent the last couple of weeks, so who knows.

Have a pleasant evening! IP


Progress as of today: 9.7 lbs lost so far, only 101.9 lbs to go!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 03/30/2016:
Man...I was tempted to pick up smoked salmon today bc I have been enjoying treating myself to salty foods lately. but...no. I didn't pick it up bc I couldn't think about spending even more money on food. lol. I have bought so much, I will not need to go food shopping again until I get back from the wedding Sunday! LOL...considering I will not even be in this apartment both Friday night into Sunday.

Glad to hear your face is doing better. Mine usually calms down with less stress. This week though, i'm taking matters into my own hands :)

innerpeace - Tuesday Mar 29, 2016

Weight: 311.9

Comments comment:

The sky is blue.

The weather is cold.

I am at work.

We went shopping.

Easter was last weekend.

You are a nice person.

You left the toilet seat up.

All comments! Why is it that my DH says the last one is a complaint? I say because he feels guilty and wants to start something. I just made the comment how he reacts to it is his own doing. If when I say this comment you feel you should have done something different or you feel you got caught doing something you shouldn't then this is not my fault. I am not complaining, I merely made a comment.

I walked into the bathroom and saw the toilet hadn't been flushed. I didn't leave it. So either DH or the little girl left it. I made the comment. Someone needs to come and take care of this toilet. So the guilty one gets mad and finally comes and takes care of it. Again, not a complaint in my book. Handle your business!

NOTE TO SELF: Don't take naps in the afternoon on workdays! It took forever for me to get to sleep last night and then the back neighbors, who live on an acre lot or larger was blasting music and having a bon fire, this upset my dog and he barked and barked. Poor thing! DH's stomach was acting up or he had indigestion or heartburn or something but he was up and down and then he starts with the passing gas and stinking up the room, I made him go downstairs. Needless to say, sleep was there but it sucked!

Work is Meh today!

B: asiago bagel, cream cheese, iced vanilla latte

S: left over pretzel stick

L: 1/2 hamburger from dinenr last night, I had two halo tangerines, but one was black inside and the other was very dry so I only ate 1/2 of it.

I had yogurt but it was past the good by date and tasted curdled so I tossed that.

S: trail mix

D: DH was talking about pesto chicken, not sure how he is going to make this.

Have a good evening!


Progress as of today: 9.7 lbs lost so far, only 101.9 lbs to go!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 03/29/2016:
Lol, men....never wanna take responsibility for their actions...LOL...I am facing a situation not similar, but involving a man and the fact he'd rather party all the time than be serious for a second! And I still love in anyways, bc he definitely has stolen a piece of my heart. I hope one day he will share half my heart with me at least!

hollybelle on 03/29/2016:
Rowdy neighbors! Have a good one tomorrow!

innerpeace - Monday Mar 28, 2016

Weight: 311.9

Today was interesting. I get a text from DH that he is wanting to go home about 10:30. I'm thinking he is in pain so I ask my boss if I can leave to go pick him up (we carpool). My boss is like sure, we are flexible here. I get DH and he just wants to leave because he has no work to do. So we go home. We take an awesome nap. When we wake up we go eat an early dinner and then go shopping. We get back home and just relax. It was good to leave work at lunch, we should all do that more often.

B: bagel, iced vanilla latte

L: 1/2 left over porkcho sandwich

D: 1/2 cheeseburger with homemade chips.

I had about 1600 calories. My calories have been ok, but I can see us creeping back into the bad habit routines.

Progress as of today: 9.7 lbs lost so far, only 101.9 lbs to go!

thinkpositive on 03/29/2016:
Fun to do something different. Nice to have a flexible boss!

innerpeace - Sunday Mar 27, 2016

Weight: 311.9

Stupid Easter! Bad memories on this day in my life. I will type more later. B. Bagel and cream cheese D: pork chop, stuffing and green beans Bear claw, golden Oreos eating like crap! Over 2300 calories today.



In 1988 my son was in the hospital on Easter day. He had an abscess on his forehead. He kept falling and bumping his head. Earlier in the week he had fallen at the mall on the concrete floor (he was just over 2 yeras old). He had a little bump pop up on his forehead, the next day he fell down and hit his head on the side of a chair, this time it popped up and wouldn't go away. Being in the military I took him to the hospital and they wanted to treat me like a criminal. It was awful, they didn't treat him and sent him to the children's hosptial in town. They had to do surgery and pack his abscess. We were in the hospital Easter weekend. It was terrible for my little guy, but he made it through like a champ. Later we find out he has a lazy eye, this is the reason he kept falling. We had that fixed too, not once but twice.

And then in 1990 I was in jump school at Fort Benning, GA and was in terrible pain. I went to the ER and they kept telling me they pain I felt wasn't anything. I couldn't  lie down and  I couldn't stand, all I could do was sit bent over in a chair. They had me sit there in the ER for six hours because they didn't want to call in a surgeon on the holiday. WTF!! When I woke up from ER the Dr. had the nerve to tell me how sick I was...my appendix had burst. Well if your ass was here four hours ago, it might not have been so bad. AZZHAT!

And then DH's wife first started acting crazy on Easter. He is brooding and moody, this day is just so irritating.

Progress as of today: 9.7 lbs lost so far, only 101.9 lbs to go!

cybermom4 on 03/28/2016:
May today be a good day full of joy and happiness!

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