- Saturday Mar 28, 2009
The massage was great, and I really needed it. I was already feeling better after the last massage, but this one was the cherry on top. I made another appointment in three weeks' time, to try to go onto a regular maintenance schedule. It helps incredibly with posture, i've found.
I thought I was supposed to get my period yesterday, but it never happened and I feel fine today (knock on wood), so i'm not sure what's going on. Maybe my math isn't good and I didn't count it out correctly. Anyways, so instead of feeling crummy I actually feel pretty good. I should take this opportunity to go to the gym for RUN THREE today (supposed to be done on Sunday). Right now I feel like I could run a marathon. Haha, five minutes into a marathon maybe...
I continue to doubt my relationship with BF. I wish we were on better standing with each other, it would make things so much easier. One is wary and the other is paranoid. Neither of us are very trusting. It's almost like a bomb just waiting to go off, but we are too weak to do anything about it. Except complain, of course!
Well, I am thirsty so i'm going to get a bottle of water and start chugging! Have a great day!
- Thursday Mar 26, 2009
BF and I went out for dinner yesterday. I had chicken noodle soup, a slice of garlic bread, ceasar salad and 1/2 piece of honey garlic ribs. Very yummy - this is one meal I will definitely get again. I almost can't believe I enjoyed eating red meat that much. Aside from the homemade burgers I made a couple of months ago, I don't really eat a lot of red meat.
I hit the gym for RUN TWO last night. Walked 22 minutes and ran 10 minutes, just the same as last time. My next run is not scheduled until Sunday, but I might do it on Saturday instead. This time I got in 2 miles, so I increased by .1 of a mile, from 1.9 to 2! Still, an increase is an increase and i'll take it :o).
Badminton tonight. Massage tomorrow. Good sequence!
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." - Eleanor Roosevelt
- Wednesday Mar 25, 2009
Right now I am listening to two of my co-workers gossip to each other in an office doorway. It's so annoying. If I could wear earplugs I would. I don't even care that they are talking to each other, I just don't want to hear the pssts and whispering noises! It's very distracting when trying to work (except right now, when I am writing out this entry instead of working).
Well, my stomach and lower back are really hurting today, like a chronic gut-ache type feeling. My period is due on Friday, so i'm thinking that is somehow related to the way i'm feeling today. I am taking advil, started yesterday, so hopefully that will help a bit.
I've officially run myself out of breakfast food and I desperately need to go to the grocery store today. I stopped and picked myself up a cheese biscuit and a coffee this morning before work so that I could eat something, but we all know that I could have done better than a cheese biscuit...
Thinking about it now, I don't even think I have anything to eat for lunch. Oh boy. It's going to be a long day.
Yoga tonight - 1 hour
Gym RUN TWO - Walk 24 minutes, Run 6 minutes
- Tuesday Mar 24, 2009
I ate pizza last night for dinner. It was forced down my throat
So I wrote out a tentative plan for running during the next five months leading up to the 5k race. I say tentative because I love to re-do things and I am almost certain i'll end up re-doing this plan. But for now, it looks like it would work fairly well. I am following a couch-to-5k plan and even took a more conservative approach, considering I will have a lot of time to work on it (five months). It starts this week, today actually, with 6 minutes of running and 24 minutes of walking. I may not make it to the gym tonight, but I went last night and ran 10 minutes and walked 22 minutes. So I think that pretty much covers RUN ONE.
Today is a friend's birthday dinner, so I have to go to the flower shop after work and pick up a plant arrangement and a card for her, then home to let the dogs out and feed them, then I need to go to my grandma's to say goodbye to my aunt and cousins who are heading home tomorrow morning, then pick up my friend for dinner. At some point in time, it would be nice to get some groceries. I don't think that will happen though.
Major heartburn today - do you think it's because I eat lots of bread?
RUN ONE - Walk 22; Run 10 --DONE
- Monday Mar 23, 2009
I woke up on Saturday morning with a knot in my back the size of China. I managed to find a massage therapist who worked on it for a full hour, still not getting the majority of the knot loosened. I made another appointment for Friday to hopefully finish it off. It still hurts a little bit, mostly I think because now my back has been bruised and beaten! I think i'll then make regular appointments every few weeks for a massage - I know it helped when I did this before. Sitting at a desk all day sure can do a number on a person's back! Bizarre.
Took the dogs for a walk on the weekend. It is getting warmer outside and the snow is starting to melt, thank goodness. I cannot wait to see grass! It doesn't even have to be green!
Tonight is movie night. I'm not sure what we're going to watch - I think I might suggest Great Balls of Fire, or Across the Universe. Too bad I don't have The Sound of Music, I love that movie!
I now have yet another cousin wanting to run the local run we have here every August. The initial year we had the run, I entered the 5k. Last year (the second annual run), my boyfriend entered the 5k and my mother entered the 3k walk. This year, both of my parents want to enter the 3k walk, and my boyfriend and his cousin, two of my cousins and my gym partner want to enter the 5k. I think it's wonderful that it has caught on so well and I can involve my family and friends in such a healthy activity! I am so excited for everyone to do well - but also need to start getting into it myself. So, i've pulled out my 5k training program and will start at it full force in the next week or two. It will be so nice to get outside and RUN!
- Friday Mar 20, 2009
my arms hurt. bad. that was awesome.
- Thursday Mar 19, 2009
I am amazed at my incapacity to think the same way others think. Seriously. Why do I work for a huge organization where we're herded to our death like a group of buffalo to the edge of a cliff?! It takes me far too long to figure out what someone else's thought process is, and by the time I do figure it out, either the meeting is over or i've over-thought it and am now confused. I'm not kidding you - I live in an almost constant state of confusion. Imagine what we could accomplish as organizations AND individuals if we allowed ourselves to think freely instead of always feeling like you just have to get it done and not think about it at all. The simplification of life is my greatest goal, my greatest dream and my greatest obstacle. I wonder if other people are managing to do it, or if it only looks as such on the outside.
Anyways, i've been away for a while - nothing really exciting has been going on lately. I went to a concert (The Eagles), and... yeah, that's about it. I haven't been to the gym recently, but my bf has finally decided that the gym is not his enemy, so he has agreed to accompany me when I have no one else to go with. That is a HUGE change, and i'm very thankful he has made the decision to support my healthier lifestyle efforts. Now if I could just get him to stucco the house this summer...
Tonight bf and I are going to the local high school for drop-in badminton from 7:30 until 9:00. Hopefully we will be able to find our rackets but i'm told the school will have extra if we cannot find ours. I am extremely excited about this, as I used to play badminton in high school and have only been able to play on and off a handful of times. I can't wait, but I imagine my arms are going to HURT tomorrow!
My eating is going so-so. I still constantly pig out on bread and bread products, but I have to say that i'm eating less and less junk food every week, and more healthy alternatives (salad, fruit and yogurt to name a few). I'm so happy to be able to say that! My attitude has stayed quite even over the last few weeks as well; I have experienced only a few of the typical misfires and general irrationalizations I normally pollute my entries with! I think this is due in large part to my eating patterns, but also because I can feel spring trying to break through the hard winter ice in town. The sun is shining, the dogs are staying outside for more than five minutes at a time, and it feels as though a weight has been lifted. I must remember to load up on Vitamin D before next winter!
- Thursday Mar 05, 2009
Why does it always have to be so busy everytime I take a measly day away from the office????? ARGH, this is so frustrating! FRUSTRATING! People are making me angry and i'm having WAY too many blonde moments today and I just can't do anything RIGHT!
And i'm busy. Why is it ALWAYS busy? Oh, right - i've already brought that up.
Did well the last two days (even though I did not count up calories yet) while out of town on business and even hit the gym at the hotel for 30 minutes of treadmill running - 10 minutes running total and walked the other 20 minutes. Not as much water, but I still did very well considering there wasn't a lot of time to devote to drinking it...
- Tuesday Mar 03, 2009
Ugh. I went on a mini-buffet yesterday. In my own home. Paying for it today. Why do I do this?????
When I got home from work yesterday I was feeling really tired. I had already had my fill of snacks, adding an extra snack during the day because I just could not stop munching. That would have all been well and good had I just decided to make dinner as soon as I got home, but no, I lay down on the couch instead. I had a bit of a headache and all I wanted to do was curl up and sleep. After about 10 minutes of that, I decided I was too hungry to wait for dinner to cook (which would have taken all of 5 minutes) and grabbed the rest of the Triscuit crackers and gobbled them down. Then I made a peanut butter sandwich and ate that. At least I stopped after this point, until later on in the evening when I actually had dinner - a ham sandwich. Enough carbs tonight, 'ya think?!
All that doesn't even look terrible until you add up the calories.
Monday - 2023 calories.
I don't know. I was going to go to the gym, I was going to prepare for the trip i'm taking today on business, I was going to read and study a couple of things. I did nothing. And not only because I didn't want to - I also forgot. I mean, I forgot. How do you forget to pack? To work out? Sometimes my mind just freezes up, like it's saying "hey, enough, enough already, i'm full up lady", and won't process any more information. It's exasperating!
Anyways, I drank lots of water yesterday, around 4.5 litres. I guess I was hoping to somehow make up for the excess amount of food that entered my stomach. I'm pretty sure it didn't work. Today, i'm crampy and bloated because of all the bread and grains I ate yesterday. Why do I never learn?!
- Monday Mar 02, 2009
"If our definition or concept of ourselves comes from what others think of us – from the social mirror – we will gear our lives to their wants and their expectations; and the more we live to meet the expectations of others, the more weak, shallow and insecure we become."
If I would have updated this journal on Saturday, it would have gone much like this:
Since it is today and not Saturday, I can only say that I had a terribly rotten day on Saturday. Saturday. was. rotten. My magic potion did not work - not totally, anyways. So I got my period on Friday, took advil every two hours throughout the whole night, and woke up feeling okay. So I got up and started making breakfast. Around that time, my stomach twisted its evil head 180 degrees, took one look at the fairly content expression on my face, and decided to change my expression to one of pure agony.
I tried to take a bath, and just like last month as soon as I stepped foot into the tub the pain was about ten times worse. When I finally managed to get out of the tub, I lay down beside the toilet for awhile, wretching and crying and shaking, until I didn't have anything left in my stomach. I dressed myself and walked into the living room only to find bf waiting to take me to the hospital. I told him this time I wanted to wait it out, that I just needed half an hour for the medication I took to start working. Three hours later, I was finally feeling better.
The rest of the weekend went alright, did some cleaning and lounged around a lot of the time.
Friday - 1568 calories
Saturday - 1720 calories (of course, some of this didn't stay down...)
Sunday - 1943 calories (this was because of some baking I did and then proceeded to eat. All of it)
I need to find the gumption to get my butt to the gym. I will be out of town on business tomorrow and Wednesday night, so unless the hotel has a gym i'm going to be out of luck. Oh, just go! legcramps.
It's going to be a great week! I can feel it! But I could be lying! Nah, don't think so!