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legcramps - Tuesday Jun 16, 2020

Weight: 0.0

Yesterday was not a bad day.

I stuck it out at work to the bitter end and then went straight home. When I got home, I started laundry and cleaned the kitchen. Then BF texted me to see if I was going to workout. I said I WAS working out - playing games on my iPad. But he motivated me to get up and I went for a walk along some trails nearby, which was neat because I actually found some trails I hadn't known were there.

Then I jumped in my massage chair for a bit, and BF's daughter sent me some of her homework to edit and check over. I had a peanut butter sandwich after work, and then smoked pork tenderloin with a baked potato for supper. I have vegetables in the fridge I should eat.

So yeah, not a bad day!

I was up this morning for mobility work, which felt awesome. Now i'm at work. I have to work a shift at the gym this week, so i'll need to figure out what i'm going to do there. It's wierd jumping back into it, but I know i'll be fine. So long as no one touches me, because then i'll freak right out. 

Anyways, the plan for today is to get through the workday without feeling like I got hit by a truck! Wish me luck!

Horn_of_plenty on 06/16/2020:
You sound like you did have a GREAT day! i know even if you feel that way now, you will feel better later! :)

like you, i love going and seeing new places, new trails.

it's good your BF is a big motivator when it comes to exercise ;). i'd love that, too.

bearcountrygg on 06/16/2020:
That massage chair sounds like heaven........discovering new trails...always fun.

Donkey on 06/16/2020:
Ooo, I hope your shift at the gym goes well! Some gyms are opening up in my area. (But not my gym.) No touching, social distancing, sanitizing, limitations on capacity (# of people in the building or in a class), etc.. You should be ok if people are respectful.

legcramps - Monday Jun 15, 2020

Weight: 0.0

It's nice to see a slow day at work here or there now; i'm grateful to have them. I unintentionally showed up to work early on Friday morning, so I left early as well; I wasn't about to voluntarily stay any longer than I needed to LOL.

I'm still finding it tough to motivate myself to workout. I did get some yardwork done on Friday, which was nice. It's been really busy with one thing or another this weekend. Two birthday parties, more yardwork, and an afternoon with a smoker (a device that smokes food, not a person LOL). BF and I went for a walk along the trails near his place yesterday afternoon, and that was nice. It was actually more of a walk/run because it took me a bit of effort to keep up to him, especially on the hilly climbs. I ran all the downhills just to catch up.

I have Friday off this week, and i'm really looking forward to it. I have a lot to do before I get there, though, so my evenings cannot look like they have lately. No more naps, legcramps. Come on, you can do this!

A friend showed me a picture of a pool one of her friends made in their backyard using pallets and grain bags. It was beautiful, but more importantly, it was long and narrow and a LAP POOL. I want one so bad now! But due to certain by-laws, I would have to build a fence around my yard and I do not want to do that at all. So I guess I just continue to dream of swimming ;)

Have a good week everyone :)

bearcountrygg on 06/15/2020:
Pools are great...and a whole lot of work...we had one for many years..( above ground oval and 4 to 6 foot depth).....but it was hard to keep it balanced,....and I'm no chemist...LOL......but it was great on super hot days........when we finally gave up on it and didn't want to invest in another one ( they get leaks and deterioration).....I was kind of relieved......yet now....I find myself thinking about a hot tub.....LOL....son has one and enjoys it...but it doesn't allow exercise like a pool does....I think we are meant to be in the water part of the time.....do you have a Y in your town?

legcramps on 06/15/2020:
I have an indoor pool in my town, but it won't be opening up this year. So I will have to drive at least 30 minutes to do any type of swimming this summer :(

happy-1 on 06/16/2020:
I miss pools... summer... fun. What a happy snippet to think about.

grannyannie on 06/16/2020:
I'd love to jump in a pool or lake! Our gym has been closed since March and that's the only pool around here.

legcramps - Wednesday Jun 10, 2020

Weight: 0.0

I woke up this morning with only a small amount of flow; nothing overnight. That is a good sign. Will continue to monitor. Sorry in advance if you don't really want to hear about it ;)

Could definitely be menopause or pre-menopause; i'm 43 already. But could also be a by-product of birth control. Hoping it's only one of these two reasons and not something else, something more serious.

BF and I celebrated three years together yesterday. We met in the middle at a lake that is close to both of us - well, an hour's drive for me each way, and 40 minutes for him, but that's ok. He took his kayak out and I took my SUP (stand up paddle) board. Except I forgot my lifejacket, and the ore. Sigh. BF lent me his daughter's lifejacket, and I got on my belly and paddled with my arms. Ouch, the water was cold! It wasn't long before my hands and forearms were numb and red from the cold water, but we managed to stay in the lake for almost a whole hour. 

Afterwards, we sat in the back of the van and had a picnic - I had picked up the fixings for bagel sandwiches, and brought along raw veggies and fruit, and some chocolate for dessert. We also got to visit friends who have a seasonal campsite at that particular lake.

Then I drove home with the heat cranked since I hadn't brought a change of clothes with me and was soaking wet. I had a hot bath when I got home and still wasn't completely comfortable when I went to bed. But I feel good today - nothing like a little "cold that goes straight through your bones" to wake a person up!

grannyannie on 06/10/2020:
Could be menopause. I was early at age 40. Didn't miss it.

Donkey on 06/11/2020:
I've wanted to learn how to kayak for the longest time. Sounds like a lovely time with the BF.

Perhaps the hormone shot activated an angry fibroid. Has this happened before with the depo shot? A prolonged flow?

grannyannie on 06/11/2020:
I don't do any kayaking now but have done a lot of it from the ocean to calm water.

Horn_of_plenty on 06/11/2020:
i have read that in their 40's, the flow can be strong and unpredictable.

bearcountrygg on 06/11/2020:
Hope you feel better......getting some iron in your system might be good right about now too.

legcramps - Tuesday Jun 09, 2020

Weight: 0.0

I'm starting to feel a little nervous about having bled for so long already. I want to give it a few more days before I talk to my doctor - this might be procrastination on my part because i've gotten so anxious about it. It had gotten much lighter, yesterday was only a small amount through the day, but this morning I woke up with a flow once again. 

I took a rest day yesterday, aside from doing my morning mobility work. I used the massage chair and accidentally fell asleep in it. Then Mom phoned and talked to me until 9:15 p.m. and by that point I had called it quits on a workout.

Today is mine and BF's dating anniversary - three years. So we will probably plan an outdoor activity as long as the weather plays nice.

I did not do well with eating yesterday, even though I skipped supper. I still managed to eat three donuts throughout the day :(

Starting the day with a healthy breakfast:  one slice 12 grain toast with peanut butter, with a bowl of watermelon and pineapple

I have a lot of leftovers in the fridge, so i'll be picking at that for lunch today, but lunch will definitely include a large salad.

Supper might just be a subway sandwich since BF and I plan to meet up somewhere. It will be easiest.

grannyannie on 06/09/2020:
I don't know your age but when I was 40 I started after very long tom, then I'd skip a few months, then long again. Menopause.

Horn_of_plenty on 06/09/2020:
nice job working on your health and eating today. i'm also finding that terrible food choices and little stresses and hormones have made a pizza out of my face and i'm also looking on eating better like you are. picked up some plums and strawberries and couple bananas to ripen!!

yes, it's prob good to either contact dr or read a bit and see if you have things in common with menopause or peri-m just like granny has mentioned..

Donkey on 06/10/2020:
Yes, get yourself checked out. If nothing else, you want to be sure you don't become anemic!

I love Subway. Funny house I'd rather have that than the cold cuts in my refrigerator, even though it's the same thing!

thinkpositive on 06/10/2020:
Hope you can get some answers to ease your mind.

legcramps - Monday Jun 08, 2020

Weight: 0.0

Good Lord, so this is Day 13 of TOM... I am guessing that something to do with the depo shot really messed up my cycle. REALLY hoping that it diminishes soon and if not I guess I will have to make a doctor's appointment.

BF and I went for a gravel ride on Friday night when he got to my place. Still really dry outside and we got dirty pretty quickly, but it was a nice ride and we found a couple of new roads to ride on.

Took a complete rest day on Saturday; the weather was not cooperative at all, so there was nothing to do but housework and be lazy all day. I was OK with it ;)

Sunday I went out on the highway with my road bike. I was super impressed with how I seem to have made some progress with my speed. Maybe it's just "first time lucky" but then I wouldn't have also fallen off my bike if I had been that lucky LOL.

Our meals over the weekend were fun - we checked out a food truck on Friday, made sausage and perogies on Saturday, and had some yummy breakfasts as well. Last night we made two batches of burritos - one batch with ground beef and one with chicken. We will freeze most of it so we have some quick meals handy.

grannyannie on 06/08/2020:
13 days! I remember having 11 days right before menopause.

bearcountrygg on 06/08/2020:
I've been holding off but I guess I will just say it....when I was 48....I had a period that went for 14 days...went to the doctor...she told me it wasn't a period...that I was bleeding...3 days later I had a complete hysterectomy and the cause of the bleeding was multiple small fibroids......I would encourage you to make that appointment.....if that is what is going on with you any kind of exercise could make it worse.....in the midst of my situation...I stepped on a magazine that was on the floor and fell hard....it got worse....so I believe that you should get checked without waiting too long.....she did send me to the pharmacy to get a depo shot which she did give me in the office that day in hopes of slowing things down.....it didn't work.

legcramps on 06/09/2020:
oh my!

Donkey on 06/08/2020:
I kind of have to agree with the ladies above.

legcramps - Friday Jun 05, 2020

Weight: 0.0

I was able to get outside for a bike ride yesterday. I wasn't going to, but then BF phoned and said he was going to go for a ride, and I became jealous and decided I would go for one too. It is so dry here that every time a car passed me on the gravel road, they kicked up so much dust that I was covered in a thin layer by the time I got home. Does dirt have any nutritional value? Because i'm sure I accidentally ate some of it too.

Day 10 of TOM :( :( :( Around day 6, I started taking iron pills since i'm not sure how much blood i'm actually losing. It seems like a pretty regular flow throughout the day. Some clotting still.

BF packed his kayak into the van so if the weather is nice enough this weekend we are hoping to get out on the water. And if I play my cards right, maybe I could even go for a non-public, hide behind the weeds swim! At this point, even just "falling" off my paddleboard would suffice. Just let me doggy-paddle for a few minutes LOL.

bearcountrygg on 06/05/2020:
Hope you get a chance to swim.

Horn_of_plenty on 06/05/2020:
Is it so many days of TOM bc you never used it get it ?

Nice ideas in regards to getting a swim in no matter what !

Your bike ride sounds amazing - I’m enjoying riding my bike around town whenever I do it !

Donkey on 06/06/2020:
LOL on the caloric value of dirt. Well, if not calories, I'm sure there's plenty of essential minerals. Actually, folks that are malnourished sometimes eat dirt or clay. I'm sure you're familiar with the eating condition called pica.

I cannot fathom 10 days of TOM. It probably is a good idea that you are taking an iron supplement.

legcramps - Thursday Jun 04, 2020

Weight: 0.0

No more schedule. I'm not ready for a schedule yet. It's only allowing the dark, negative part of me the space to let out its aggression.

And P.S. I feel a LURCHING, DESPERATE NEED to go swimming. I have felt it for about a week now. I just want to swim, and I CAN'T! ARGH!

In terms of having the energy to return to normal activity, I'm definitely much further along than I was just a few weeks ago, so that's something. I'm getting there, it's just taking its sweet time. And if I could do things like go lane swimming, I would progress a lot faster (*end vent*)

I guess swimming offers me time in my own head, to work things out or just to not have to focus on anything. When I bike I have to concentrate on what i'm doing. When I do other workouts, they are also dependent on my level of focus. Being able to continue doing mobility each morning in large part has been due to the fact that those movements are almost automatic now, and I don't have to focus as much and am able to use that space in other ways (for example, this morning all I thought about while doing my mobility work was the birds nest outside my window, and the birds that woke me up chirping away at 5:15 a.m.). Before I knew it, I was done and it was time for breakfast.

I have to pick up some salads after work today, and that's it. BF might come visit. Regardless, tomorrow is Friday and I need a couple of days off (Saturday and Sunday).

Also, i'm currently on Day 9 of TOM. Now we could have a whole conversation about ridiculousness around THAT.

bearcountrygg on 06/04/2020:
Well...the birds were bad and then thinking about them made time pass.......I guess that all worked itself out OK. Give yourself a break Legs....meditation???

legcramps on 06/05/2020:
Thank you, I know I should give myself a break I am working really hard to just be gentle with myself. I've tried to meditate before with mixed results - sometimes I can't get my brain to shut off. I didn't mean for it to sound like I didn't appreciate the birds...I enjoyed waking up to them very much and like that they have a nest right outside my window :)

grannyannie on 06/05/2020:
I really miss my gym. I haven't been since Nov just before we went to Thailand. And soon after we came home on March 3rd, the gym closed.

legcramps on 06/05/2020:
Yes, I know a lot of people count on gyms to maintain their health and sanity. I'm glad to see it is re-opening, i'm just very leery about going back to work there - since I also work in a hospital setting.

Horn_of_plenty on 06/05/2020:
Dang day 9?! Mine is now very quick for two days it’s heavy then almost gone ! I guess I am not really saying the right thing here lol!

Sorry your pool is not open yet. I’m sure part of your struggle is from not getting all of the relaxation of your thoughts and endorphins that swimming provide

legcramps on 06/05/2020:
LOL, well i'm happy that TOM for you is very quick. I hope one day I will be at that point also!

Yes, it feels like I am constantly searching for the exercise that will truly put my mind at ease. Haven't found that balance yet.

legcramps - Wednesday Jun 03, 2020

Weight: 0.0

MAY 29 - mobility 25 minutes; bike 1 hour, 9 minutes

MAY 30 - mobility 25 minutes

MAY 31 - REST!

JUNE 1 - mobility 25 minutes

JUNE 2 - mobility 25 minutes; yardwork 1 hour

JUNE 3 - mobility 25 minutes

Every time I write something that i've done in the schedule above, I think to myself "you could have done better than that". For some reason lately i've been playing head games with myself, bemoaning myself for not doing all the things I think I should be doing. I keep thinking if everyone else is getting back to their normal, I should get back to mine too. And I just can't get there. And I know it's ok to give myself more time, I know that's probably what I need - but it's upsetting that I can't just jump back into it when I see people around me are having no problems doing that. I feel weak, powerless, and unstable.

Also, i'm upset with myself for not saying "NO" to a couple of shifts at the gym this month. I was asked because they were in a tight spot, which makes it SO HARD to say no. So of course I told them I would take the shifts, and now i'm anxious about it.

So anyways, not a great start to the day, but at least it's Wednesday! Happy Hump Day!

bearcountrygg on 06/03/2020:
Praise yourself for accomplishing what you did...a lot of other people didn't even do that.

Horn_of_plenty on 06/03/2020:
Give yourself some slack and take a rest week if you need to do that to come back stronger - you will get there I have no doubt !

legcramps - Tuesday Jun 02, 2020

Weight: 0.0

MAY 28 - mobility 25 minutes; bike 50 minutes

MAY 29 - mobility 25 minutes; bike 1 hour, 9 minutes

MAY 30 - mobility 25 minutes

MAY 31 - REST!

JUNE 1 - mobility 25 minutes

JUNE 2 - mobility 25 minutes

For the absolute LIFE of me, I cannot get myself back on a schedule! This is driving me nuts already! I passed out on the couch after work again yesterday, and slept until 7:30. It's like my eyes automatically close as soon as I step inside the house LOL. Of course I was groggy and tired after I woke up, and spent the rest of the evening doing a few dishes and sitting in the massage chair.

Today, i'm going to stop and pick up subway right after work. I'm going to go home and eat, and then i'm hoping that will give me some energy to do something. I know one reason i've been going straight home and to sleep is because i'm mentally exhausted, physically tired and snack-hungry. If I can resolve one of those issues, maybe I can get my butt into action.

...UPDATE:  A friend just reminded me that i've been pretty sick for awhile now, with my back, with headaches, TOM, and with allergies, and that I should allow myself some time to continue recovering. She's right, of course, but it's just frustrating when I keep thinking of all the activities I was doing a few months ago. I see it all backsliding and it's really hard to watch it all slip away.

bearcountrygg on 06/02/2020:
Well stress can do that...give yourself a break right now...i agree with your friend.......

Donkey on 06/02/2020:
Maybe it's the hormones, going back on the shot.

It's very frustrating to feel like you're backsliding but I encourage you to listen to your body. If you're falling asleep when you get home, I think you need the sleep!

Are you this tired on days off too?

grannyannie on 06/03/2020:
It's so hard to get back to a schedule when you've been off for a while. Been a very long time for me! Hang in there.

thinkpositive on 06/03/2020:
Seems like your body is telling you to rest.

Horn_of_plenty on 06/03/2020:
It’s true it good to take extra rest when your body wants it. I tend to get that way after really trying to fit everything in on top of work - it can be draining especially without rest - rest surely is the key to many good things!

Great idea to eat when you get how ! I use food as a motivator all the tome especially after work before a workout

legcramps - Monday Jun 01, 2020

Weight: 0.0

MAY 26 - mobility 20 minutes; bike 50 minutes

MAY 27 - mobility 20 minutes; bike 50 minutes

MAY 28 - mobility 25 minutes; bike 50 minutes

MAY 29 - mobility 25 minutes; bike 1 hour, 9 minutes

MAY 30 - mobility 25 minutes

MAY 31 - REST!

JUNE 1 - mobility 25 minutes

I was not a weekend warrior this weekend; we had a lot to do and we weren't able to fit any formal exercise into our plans.

I was also pretty sick on the weekend with TOM.

In a way, i'm glad it's Monday. I can get back into a routine and hopefully it will be a good week. Going to start off on a positive note and hope it sticks!

grannyannie on 06/01/2020:
Hope your week goes well.

Maria7 on 06/01/2020:
Hope you're feeling better.

Horn_of_plenty on 06/01/2020:
I have also had weekends where I was glad to see Monday come and get me back on a routine / stopping overeating !

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