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legcramps - Monday Feb 14, 2005

Weight: 129.0

Well, I don't know why the heck i'm not losing weight. I should be. I guess it's the weekends that are hurting me so much because I tend to forget about my diet then, as I did this weekend by having pizza, subs and lots of pop.

Plan for Today: 1 package oatmeal with 1.5c 2% milk, 1c spaghetti with 1/2oz parmesan cheese and 1T ketchup, snacks are yogurt, grapes and crackers. I may have a serving of oatmeal cookies as well (4 cookies, 180 calories). Dinner is unknown.

We are supposed to be going out for dinner tonight with another couple, but I don't think it will happen because they haven't phoned us yet. They're notorious for making plans and then breaking them, and since we don't really do too much with them I can't see them keeping this promise. But I shouldn't be so pessimistic about it.

BF is making spaghetti for lunch for Valentine's Day. I think i'm getting flowers too. I bought him two t-shirts yesterday (1/2 price!) One says Top Ten Reasons To Procrastinate: 1. *empty space* and the other one says Instant A**hole, Just Add Beer. I wanted to get him a bright pink shirt that said All My Black Shirts Are in the Wash, but they didn't have any in his size. I think he'll like the ones I got.

Chewy seems to be doing a lot better now. BF's going to check the driveway today, my car may be leaking anti-freeze and we think Chewy might have ingested some. The day I noticed that he looked depressed he'd been outside for over two hours playing at the rink with BF so there's no way it was due to a lack of exercise or winter depression. It could very well be that he just isn't getting enough attention from us, so after BF checks out the driveway to rule out the anti-freeze idea we'll have to spend a little more time with the little guy. I'm making an appointment with the vet today to get him fixed.

I also have to make an appointment with the doctor for both BF and I; an appointment with the chiropractor, again, for both of us; an eye appointment for myself and an appointment to get our passport photos taken. All these have to be made by the end of the day, and done by the end of the month. My back is really bothering me lately. It's sore all the time, as well as my stomach, but often goes numb on one side so it's time to get it checked out. It looks like i'm standing unbalanced so that's the reason for the chiropractor. Something must be out of place.

I told BF that i'm going to start scheduling myself to do things. And, they're going to get done. So my schedule for today includes making all these appointments, running the dog, finishing laundry, doing dishes, working out and then working on my scrapbook for the rest of the night. Gotta schedule in the fun too!! I want to get to sleep early tonight and get a good start on tomorrow as well. I have this coming Friday off, and i'm definitely looking forward to it. I'm hoping to move completely this weekend.

Have a great day all!

borntocry on 02/14/2005:
Mmmm... spaghetti. Hope Chewie feels better soon. My husband and I just watched the old Star Wars again recently and I kept thinking of you! I think you could be right about the anti-freeze. One of my grandmother's dogs used to like to sleep under her car, only the car leaked oil or something constantly and the dog was always very quiet and lethargic... and eventually got quite sick and died (not to worry you or anything!).

legcramps - Friday Feb 11, 2005

Weight: 128.5

Yesterday: toast with margarine, blueberry muffin, ham salad sandwich on multigrain with 2pc cucumber, 1c orange juice, 1 orange, 1 apple, 1 serving peanuts, 4 perogies.

As you can probably guess, I decided in favor of shopping for clothes instead of going out for steak. Works for me, and I had so much fun! I picked up two dress pants, two sweaters, a dress shirt and a pair of jeans for under $70CDN. I think I did very well!

Plan for Today: 2 packages oatmeal with milk, 1c yogurt, serving of crackers (115 cals), 2 apples. I need to drink my water. So it might be in the form of hot chocolate because i'm not in the mood for water straight up.

My Dad called me last night for my birthday and he's coming to visit on Sunday. That means I need to do some serious housecleaning tomorrow. BF and I already split up the work, so i'm happy that I don't have to do it all. It will be so nice to see him, it's been a while.

Chewy seems really depressed lately. I'm not sure why, but I think it's because he's lonely. The poor thing just comes up to me and begs for attention and if i'm busy he'll plop himself on the floor and pout. When I give him attention sometimes he'll just walk away from me and go to another part of the room. I don't know what he wants, but i'm guessing that he wants a 'lady'! Hopefully we're taking him in next week or the week after to get him fixed. I hope he doesn't get like this every year....

Umpqua on 02/11/2005:
A belated happy birthday! I think you made the right choice, and clothes shopping can be so much fun. It's a way for me to relax too - I just get in the shopping zone. My dog has been fixed for several years and he goes through spells where he begs for attention. I just think dogs are natural beggars in every way and they feel they have to do this. They can consume all your time and energy if you let them! I hope you have a great weekend and visit with your Dad.

cowboy on 02/11/2005:
Your eating habits sound really good. I love fried perogies, man they are good. You did great on the shopping. I just bought my poodle a sweater online, he is a neurotic mess, but we love him.

breakaway on 02/11/2005:
Oh wow to choose shopping over steak was a very good choice! WAY TO GO! I sure do envy your will power lol I don't think I could have turned down steak! YOur doing awesome can't wait to see you reach your goal.

Penguin_14 on 02/12/2005:
Happy Happy Belated Birthday! You are an inspiration choosing the shopping over the steak!!! Good for you!

I know what you mean about staying away from the gossip. Sounds like we're in the same boat. Some of these people are downright vicious at times. I try to walk away from the group if they start, and busy myself with something else. If there are only two of us, I try to change the subject. Depending on who's in the lunchroom at the time, I even eat lunch in my car listening to the radio rather than dealing with their nasty gossip. It works! :)

I think Chewy has a case of the winter blahs! Neutering him is an excellent idea. All three of mine are fixed. I think dogs get tired of being cooped up just like us, even if they go for a walk each day. Spring can't come too soon!

Have a wonderful day!

biscottibody59 on 02/12/2005:
Are you walking Chewy daily? Even a very short walk energizes a dog. He probably just misses you when you're gone and wants some attention, maybe throw the ball or spend a little time brushing him. It's amazing how sensitive they can seem at times.


Kerry79 on 02/13/2005:
Sounds like you had a great shopping trip and picked up some bargains! Nothing like new clothes to make you feel good and keep you inspired to stay on track with the diet.

Kerry x

legcramps - Thursday Feb 10, 2005

Weight: 128.5

Yesterday: I finally managed to down a whole package of oatmeal with milk, I also had two smoothies, almost a whole container of yogurt (which is just over 300 cals), 3T fat-free hot chocolate and two perogies.

Plan for Today: toast with margarine, orange, 1c orange juice, ham sandwich on multigrain bread, 2pcs cucumber; dinner, as usual, is up in the air.

I might go out for dinner tonight for steak because it's my birthday today and i'd get the meal free. That is, salad, steak with baked potatoe, and garlic bread. I'd also get a free shooter though, and since i've given up alcohol for lent, i'd have to pay $20 into the "Lent Box" for that planned mistake. And i'm not about to do that on the second day of Lent. So, we may not go at all. It's not like I need steak anyways. Nor do I need potatoes and garlic bread.

I'm calling a friend tonight and hopefully he's going to hook me up with a couple volleyball games tonight. I'm going through volleyball withdrawal and I need some exercise badly. I hope I can play; if not, maybe I can play with BF's team. I'm desperate here.

I was in a meeting this morning, where my boss told me in not so many words that i'll be around until June for sure, that's if I want to stay. Well, that's a start, seeing as I thought i'd be gone by the end of the month if there was no other job in the company to apply for. I've now applied for two positions, but if I don't get them at least now I know i'll be here until June for sure. And after that there should be a couple more positions opening up. Maybe i've been worrying about nothing. Let's knock on wood just for the heck of it.

breakaway on 02/10/2005:
YOu have problems with oatmeal too? I hate oatmeal and I'm suppose to eat it every morning per docs orders but havn't been able to bring myself to do it. lol Lent is pretty difficult to go through I hear but seems you are doing just fine. Yes, go out for that steak if it's free. ITs not that bad if you ahve baked potato rather then fries. I'm sure you will make the right choices. have a great day today!

legcramps - Wednesday Feb 09, 2005

Weight: 128.5

Yesterday: a couple mouthfuls of oatmeal and milk, 2T fat free chocolate mix, 80 cal smoothie, a ham sub on white unfortunately (the whole thing was 200 cals), 1/2L water and a few chips. I was still very sickly and therefore wasn't able to eat much.

Today is the first day of Lent, or Ash Wednesday. I will be attending mass tonight and will be semi-fasting throughout the day. Of course that means:

Plan for Today: again I could only swallow a couple mouthfuls of oatmeal this morning, hot chocolate, 2 fruit smoothies, lots of yogurt and hopefully more oatmeal.

I'm giving up alcohol for Lent. Trust me, it's quite a sacrifice...

breakaway on 02/09/2005:
Good job giving up the alcohol! You did great. Hang in there

Umpqua on 02/10/2005:
Giving up alcohol would be quite a sacrifice for me - I give you a lot of credit! Sorry you haven't been feeling good. My stomach was acting up yesterday too, but I suppose that's because of all the crap I ate. I hope you have a great day and a good fast!

legcramps - Tuesday Feb 08, 2005

Weight: 128.5

Breakaway - the smoothie is actually a Danone Sillouette product. It's a little chalky-tasting, but that figures because it's made with yogurt and I think yogurt tastes chalky. I saw 'em in the grocery store and thought i'd give it a try. There's four to a container.

Yesterday: I didn't write it all down in my journal, so this is purely guessing. I have such a bad memory. Oatmeal and milk, one whole wheat bun with margarine, 1T fat-free hot chocolate mix, 200ml smoothie, 2 ham and turkey subs (with mustard and cheese, lettuce and pickles), several glasses of gingerale. I'm really not sure what else.

Plan for Today: I had 2T of oatmeal with milk this morning and that's it so far. Not feeling extremely hungry today. I brought another smoothie for this morning, and there's a couple more sub buns so I might finish them off today. I have a meeting tonight and I need to run some chores that I wanted to do yesterday and was too sick to do. So it'll be busy.

Off I go to comment now...

Umpqua on 02/08/2005:
The smoothies I drink are a little chalky too, but they're not so bad. I'm afraid our work will never be done with this house! After the kitchen we have to gut and remodel the bathroom, finish stripping and staining the front staircase, and paint the back hall. Plus some new vinyl flooring to lay down and hardwood floors to refinish...Then there's some touchup work in the downstairs apartment and we can finally rent it. Then it's on to the attic (we want to finish it and make a bedroom and bath up there). Maybe in a couple of years we'll be halfway there! ;)

borntocry on 02/08/2005:
You've never had Nutella? It's a chocolate hazelnut spread. Imagine something with the texture of smooth peanut butter, but the taste of chocolate syrup, or chocolate fudge sauce, like the kind you put on ice-cream. Sounds like a gross thing to put on bread, but let me tell you... peanut butter and jelly sounds pretty gross to the uninitiated too. Have you ever had those round Ferrero Rocher chocolates? That's Nutella inside them. Anyway, it's a real diet-killer. 100 calories a tablespoon!

breakaway on 02/08/2005:
Thanks for that info. I did get some smoothies at the store last night when I saw them. THey are orange flavored and my son loves them. I'm going to try one in the morning. Your doing jsut fine and wanted to tell you taht you have been a good influence on us! Keep upthe good work

Becca27 on 02/09/2005:
I've been making smoothies every day. I have a Braun immersion blender and it's awesome. I put in frozen or fresh fruit (blueberries, raspberries, peaches, strawberries, or bananas), non fat / plain yogurt, 1/2 C OJ, and a tsp of honey. They tastes amazing and are very filling!! Sometimes, instead of OJ, I use skim milk.

legcramps - Monday Feb 07, 2005

Weight: 128.5

I knew i'd forgotten to do something on Friday; I must've been so out of sorts that I didn't realize that I hadn't weighed in. Well, I didn't over the weekend either. And, this morning surprised me with TOM so I didn't bother weighing in at all. I feel ill today.

Let's just say it like this Today: so far i've had oatmeal and milk, a whole wheat homemade dinner bun, toasted, with margarine, 1c of 50 cal hot chocolate. I brought a strawberry-banana smoothie to work with me for this morning, so i'll probably have that as well. (80 cals). That's darn close to 500 cals just for this morning, and I know i'll be feeling even worse this afternoon, which usually makes me feel sorry for myself and eat even more than usual. I'm going to try and get the afternoon off, but it might not work out.

Friday night I watched a movie and stayed in, Saturday was BF's birthday and since my friend's BF didn't call me regarding the dinner he was planning, I decided to not worry about it. I was awake by 7am on Saturday, went downstairs and cooked BF breakfast, then we took the dog for a run, then I went uptown and bought BF flowers and a card for his birthday. I know that may be a wierd gift to give a guy, but i'm crazy like that. He liked them though, maybe because no one's ever gotten him flowers before! I'm also making a scrapbook of BF and I and some special moments. It's not finished yet though, so I told him that was part of his gift but that he's not getting it unti it's done. Then he had the nerve to tell me that he wanted slippers for his birthday! Talk about leaving it to the last minute. I gave him my old red slippers and he's using them for now. BF's family and I went out for dinner. I had a chicken caesar salad. Then we went out and partied. Sunday we just sat around and recovered from the night before. It was actually a very nice weekend.

I think i've blabbed on long enough for today, so have a great day all! Until tomorrow.

borntocry on 02/07/2005:
Hehe, I got my husband flowers once too, and he really liked them as well. Neither of us is the type to like flowers, so it was a really weird gift, but I think that, like your boyfriend, he was kind of touched because no-one had ever given him flowers before.

breakaway on 02/07/2005:
you probablly did the right thing on waiting to weight in especially now. It may have only depressed you. Your doing really well though but we all know the water we can retain during our TOM. I am due tomorrow but the weight still came off :) I was lucky. Anyhow, the smoothie you had, was that a subway one? I was trying to find out exactly how they taste because i never had one before and I don't want to find out that I don't like it and waste it. Your scrapbook sounds wonderful and it's a great idea! You have a wonderful day today :)

legcramps - Friday Feb 04, 2005

Weight: 128.5

Late entry today. I must be busy but I don't feel as if i've gotten anything accomplished today.

Yesterday: oatmeal and milk, 1pc toast, 1c brown rice with 1c chili, 3 cookies from grandma's and a whole wheat bun. 1L water.

Plan for Today: oatmeal and milk, 1pc toast, 4 chicken nuggets with ketchup, a whole wheat bun, 3T hot chocolate mix, dinner is up in the air. I'm getting used to saying that. And, by the way, those chicken nuggets are not the fast-food ones. I bought them at the grocery store and each one is near to an ounce, but not quite.

Maybe going out for dinner tonight, my treat. BF is working this afternoon and i'm so happy about that i'm willing to buy him dinner to thank his a$$ for finally getting out of the house again. He was getting used to the t.v. and the computer being the only sources of entertainment all day. The only down side is that I would have to cook dinner tonight. Hence the 'eat-out' idea that I suggested to him at lunchtime today. I'm not ready to delve back into that frame of mind yet.

I'm feeling better today. Last night I only got TWO phone calls, and went to a friend's house for coffee. Relaxing? Well, not quite, but as close as I can get it seems. Took Chewy for a run and I walked most of the way with him. That might be why i'm feeling more chipper today. Exercise.

Goals this month: send in passport application, get dog fixed, look into travel and medical insurance, apply for two other employment positions.

Apparently sitting on MY butt everyday doesn't appeal to me like I thought it would. I was going to do that for awhile after my temp position was over, but that's not until the 28th and i'm already looking for another job. Two positions look appetizing right now, so we'll see.

Umpqua on 02/05/2005:
Sounds like you're doing great with the food. I know what you've been saying about having alone time. Some days my phone rings nonstop and I feel like I just need time to myself. Many of my friends and family live far away so the phone is our main method of staying in touch. And conversations are a half hour minimum. Anyway, I hope you had a good dinner last night and get some more alone time soon!

borntocry on 02/06/2005:
Hi legcramps,

I'm flattered that you think I have so much energy, but really, I don't do much of anything these days. I only go running once a week now, and I have no friends or family here so not much by way of social commitments. I think you do tons more stuff than I do!

Speaking of which... I don't think it's selfish at all to want some time to yourself. Sometimes I don't even bother to answer my cellphone! I just let it ring and then later, when I'm in a better mood, I check my messages and call back everyone who called me.

Well, good luck with the job hunt!

legcramps - Thursday Feb 03, 2005

Weight: 128.5

Yesterday: oatmeal and milk, 1pc toast, 1c brown rice, 1c chili with a slice of bread. 1.5L water. 3T hot chocolate mix.

Plan for Today: oatmeal and milk, 1pc toast, 1/2c chili with 1/2c brown rice, dinner's still up in the air. 3L water (ya right).

I did do something for myself yesterday. Absolutely nothing. Well, I shouldn't say that. I tried to do absolutely nothing. Everyday for the last month i've been forcing myself to do something, even if it's simply quickly making a phone call to a friend. I've made such an attempt to help others out, to visit with friends and family, to get everything done. Yesterday, I drove to the movie store, picked out The Grudge, drove home and watched it. That's all I did after work. That is, until BF drove me crazy insisting that I wash the dishes because he cooked the dinner. Which I totally agree with, but did I have to do them THAT VERY SECOND? I went to sleep pissed off, and that's the way I woke up this morning. I can feel my whole body shake with anger everytime I think about these things. I tried to have a night to myself but it just didn't work. I'll try again tonight.

I have found that the problem with visiting more with family and friends is that they're constantly badgering you afterwards. My mother phoned me last night over three times just to talk. Bf's sister came over and just watched t.v. for half an hour, wanting to visit. I can't handle this!!! I'm not an outgoing person by nature, although when i'm in the right mood I love to visit. Does that mean i'm a selfish person because I didn't want to talk to any of these people yesterday? Sometimes I would rather be alone - you don't have to deal with all these things on a daily basis when you're a hermit. I think I am being selfish.

I can't wait for the weekend to get here. Although I have a lot to do, I will be able to sleep in for an extra hour or so each morning, and won't that be nice!!

Re: commenting yesterday. My computer was working about as slowly as I was. I'll try better today.

QT on 02/03/2005:
I have days like that, were I just want to be left alone, I've found the only way to get people to stay away is to say I'm sick and need to rest. I doesn't always work, but when it does it's great.

Becca27 on 02/03/2005:
Hi Legcramps,

I love "NOTHING" days - especially when they're rare - it makes them more appreciated. January turned into a big "nothing" month for me, and I'm having a difficult time shaking off the couch potato blues. I, too, love my time to myself and don't need to be real social. It's hard to have people pulling on you and wanting you to be on their time table. Rest up and look forward to tomorrow! It's almost Friday!!!

How was the Grudge?

Runner on 02/03/2005:
Good for you to take some time to do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! I LOVE days like that! When I was teaching high school students, I NEEDED days like that...even though I enjoy being social, everyone needs time to herself or himself. Don't feel selfish because you simply don't feel like talking. I'm a big believer in "down time." And too many people never take any "down time," therefore they are always stressed out!

Enjoy those quiet moments! :)

legcramps - Wednesday Feb 02, 2005

Weight: 128.5

I wore one of my skirts to work today with a very thick sweater, and i've just noticed that I can tuck in my sweater without sucking in my stomach. The skirt is made of heavy denim and I can also pull it right down over my hips without unzipping it. I must have made some improvement, but it sure doesn't feel like it. Everytime I look at myself in the mirror, I notice my faults right away. I haven't weighed myself at all this week which is comendable given my attitude. It almost feels like my body is trying to trick me. I guess now I have to work on self-worth issues.

Yesterday: oatmeal and milk, toast, one weiner with ketchup and 1oz chicken, 1.5c brown rice with 2 links of sausage. 2.5L water. Ice cream for dessert. Oh yeah, and 1 mug mocha. (The chocolate mix is only 50 calories per mug).

Plan for Today: oatmeal and milk, toast, salad with dressing, 1.5c brown rice with 2 links sausage if there's any left. 3L water. Another mug of mocha.

My meeting went well last night. I'm glad I decided to go to the slo-pitch meeting instead of the star search meeting. I needed to be around my friends. It really helped, just the brief interlude I had with them. My Chewy helped to cheer me up a little too. I went to sleep a lot calmer than I woke up. But I still can't seem to kick this emotion entirely out the window. Something still wants to pull me down.

I will comment today.

Umpqua on 02/02/2005:
Dogs are the best for helping with a bad mood! I'm glad you're feeling a little better. And remember, the scale doesn't always reflect your hard work. If your clothes are feeling loose that's a sure sign of improvement. Congratulations!

borntocry on 02/03/2005:
Hi legcramps! Thanks for your comment. I did indeed make one of my favourite dishes recently - sweet potato casserole - and it was just for me because my husband hates sweet potatoes! And now I'm back on track with renewed motivation!

I'm glad to see you're feeling a little better from the day before (sorry, I missed that entry). I know what you mean about feeling that your body is trying to trick you. I've also felt recently that my legs are looking a little thinner... but because I haven't actually weighed myself I'm sure that my eyes are just playing tricks on me... or that I'm just getting used to how I look and haven't actually changed at all.

Anyway, I hope you feel better soon... take the advice that you gave me and do something just for yourself!

legcramps - Tuesday Feb 01, 2005

Weight: 128.5

Thanks BBody for your suggestion. I still haven't brought it up to BF.

Troubled and depressed today, yesterday, the day before. I could barely lift my head this morning to get out of bed. I shoudn't be overwhelmed, but I am. I'm at my breaking point and I have no idea how I got here in the first place. Seems like it just happened. Last night I sat on the couch and cried for half an hour. For no real reason other than self-pity. Kumbaya.

Yesterday: oatmeal and milk, peaches, toast, bread, weiners, low-fat ice cream. 1L water. No exercise.

Plan for Today: oatmeal and milk, toast, weiner, sausage and brown rice, low-fat fudgsicle. 3L water. Meeting tonight, no exercise.

Hopefully I can cheer myself up today, but if you asked me to right now i'd probably try punching you in the face. You know i'm kidding, right?

TheMother on 02/01/2005:
Sorry to hear you're feeling down and overwhelmed. What I've told my kids and myself when faced with this feeling - is to take ONE thing at a time. Whatever is the first priority, address that, then go to the next thing and so on. It will all get done in due time. My suggestion is to prioritize what needs immediate attention and what can be put on the back burner for the time being. As for the proposal/BD situation, can your friend's BF propose to her on Friday night instead? If not, how's about he takes her to dinner just the two of them and you and your BF do your thing and then meet up with them later to have a celebratory drink? This way, your friend will have "HER" moment and your BF can have his. I have to agree with Biscotti on the part about having an audience present when something so personal should be intimate...at least that's my view.

Cheer up...things will get better.


biscottibody59 on 02/01/2005:
I feel for you--I hope you get to feeling better--I know sometimes getting in some activity can help alleviate these feelings of despair--please take care of YOU today! Everything else can wait!

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