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legcramps - Thursday Oct 20, 2011

Weight: 165.5

Yesterday: coffee, cheese biscuit, chicken pasta, yogurt and granola, crackers and cheese, chicken pasta, granola and pecans with whip cream (low fat).

Did I need all those snacks yesterday? Probably not. Again, I was out almost as soon as my head hit the pillow yesterday. This morning I didn't get out of bed until well after 7am, so needless to say I was slightly late for work this morning. My eyes are not as sore today though, so that's a good sign. I washed bedsheets yesterday and cleaned.

Today i'm going to try:

Breakfast 8:30: Carrot Muffin, 8oz coffee DONE

Morning 11:00: Grapes (1/2 cup), water (1 litre) DONE

Lunch 12:00: Soup, 8oz coffee DONE (cream of potato soup)

Afternoon 2:00: Sandwich (1/2 tuna, 1/2 ham), water (1 litre) DONE

Afternoon 4:00: mozza cheese and crackers :(

Dinner 6:30: crackers :(

Evening 8:00: turkey bacon and cheese sandwich :(

We'll give that a try today and see how it goes, it'll give me around 1,900 calories. I'm also craving pumpkin muffins, so I might look for a low-calorie recipe and make some for breakfasts. The Dog Park Crew will be out at the site working today. I work until 4pm, but I might scoot out there afterwards to see how they're doing. And then again, I might not. A little indecisive today ;)

My Mom went away for a few days, so we haven't had the discussion I so need to have with her. She was upset when I told her over the phone that Dog would be put down, and it just irritated me. I still can't figure out if i'm angry or just majorly disappointed, and what I want to do with that information. For goodness' sake legcramps, she probably really is sad that Dog will no longer be around, so give her a break will you?

Progress as of today: 9.5 lbs lost so far, only 10.5 lbs to go!

~WI~ on 10/20/2011:
I am sorry to hear about your beloved dog. I'm actually sad. I remember when my dog died and I still miss her badly some days, and it has been 25 years. I don't think everyone grieves by bawling their eyes out, sometimes our grief is evident by how silent we are about it. Your grief is there, you are just processing it differently and there is nothing wrong with that. When the time comes for you to release that grief through tears, your heart will know.

I think the Dog Park project is wonderful!

glycrina on 10/20/2011:

grannyannie on 10/20/2011:
I know how you feel. Hugs. And we do all cope differently.

shams on 10/20/2011:
have a nice day

V on 10/20/2011:
Love YOU <3

legcramps - Wednesday Oct 19, 2011

Weight: 165.5

It was strange coming back to an empty house yesterday. It's bizarre, but the house seemed so much bigger. A few bouts of tears slipped past my eyes, but all in all things went as well as I had hoped. I was glad I made the decision to stay with Dog in the room, as I really think she needed me there to reassure her.

I didn't know what to make for dinner yesterday, so I threw a chicken pizza into the oven. My lunch was leftover pasta with chicken. Really overloading on the chicken. Then I read for a bit and headed to an early bedtime.

I was asleep soon after my head hit the pillow, which is new for me; usually I toss and turn before finally finding sleep. I slept right through until 6 this morning. My eyes feel heavy and scratchy, but heaven knows if I got through yesterday, i'll get through today too!

Tonight is Zumba. I am debating going. I want to wash some bedsheets, blankets and tidy a few things. I will feel better after i've been able to pack away some of Dog's things. I also want to get back into routine, but now is maybe not the time yet.

Progress as of today: 9.5 lbs lost so far, only 10.5 lbs to go!

grannyannie on 10/19/2011:
So sorry. {hugs} Maybe Zumba will make you feel a bit more energized?

glycrina on 10/19/2011:
My heart is heavy for you. I think keeping busy would be my plan. My yoga video always talks about "showing up for yourself" even when it is difficult. But whatever you decide to do, Zumba or cleaning, I hope you find some peace today.

V on 10/19/2011:
hey do whatever is going to make you feel better, if I lived closer, i would come help you pack up things with you.. Lots more love sent your way today <3 <3 <3

Umpqua on 10/19/2011:
You are doing amazingly well. xoxo

legcramps - Tuesday Oct 18, 2011

Weight: 165.5

Up a bit in weight but seeing as I haven't weighed myself in a while, i'm okay with this considering everything that's been going on for the last few months. I am definitely an emotional eater :(

Dog is going to the vet this afternoon for her last visit. I've taken the afternoon off work so that I can spend some more time with her and get myself ready. I think she knows. Last night, when I was laying on the couch she jumped up and layed her head on my hand and started snoring away. Just wanted to be close I guess :)

I feel right beat up from my massage yesterday! I must do this more often, so i've made two more appointments for the next two months. It felt so good! I'm quite sore today, but I know tomorrow will be better. I'm going to try and have as much water as possible today, to get those muscles back in good form!

Ok, so I don't have much more to say about anything, so i'll sign off now and move on with my day. Have a wonderful day all. Please send thoughts and prayers our way today :)

Progress as of today: 9.5 lbs lost so far, only 10.5 lbs to go!

getmebackto150 on 10/18/2011:
Thinking of you during this tough time... I too have a massage scheduled for tomorrow! Cannot wait! I think its awesome that you are getting a few in the next few months, they are SO therapeutic and good for you!!!

Umpqua on 10/18/2011:
I'm thinking of you today. Good job scheduling those massages, you deserve it!

grannyannie on 10/18/2011:
Hope your dog gets better and things look up for you! I haven't had a massage in ages, I'm well overdue!

V on 10/18/2011:
Thinking of you and Dog..Lots of love your way <3 <3 <3

glycrina on 10/18/2011:
you and dog are in my thoughts and prayers. you are so brave and so loving. I hope you are not alone and have a good friend to support you through this process.

sweetpea1977 on 10/18/2011:
Hugs to you sweetie. I'm thinking of both of you during this difficult time. <3

biscottibody59 on 10/18/2011:
I'm sorry. Thinking of you this evening . . .

legcramps - Monday Oct 17, 2011

Weight: 164.0

I called the vet on Friday morning to get antibiotics for Dog. They gave me an ointment to treat her eye with. She had a bad reaction and her eye blew up to two times its normal size and looked like it was pushing itself right out of its socket. Yuck. So much for that idea. I had to go to a meeting that evening, and it was hard, I gotta say, to keep in all the emotions and stop re-running the reaction over and over again in my head.

Unfortunately, Dog has also stopped eating. I did manage to get some noodles and chicken into her yesterday, but I must be reasonable with myself. This is no way for her to live. So today I will call the vet and see what needs to be set up in order to have her put down. I've rued this day people, for over a month and a half now. But I have to be strong and do the right thing.

I am getting a massage after work today and I cannot wait. I haven't had a massage since I moved into my house. I am going to try and set up regular visits - it will have to be included in the budget somehow. I used to have massages regularly and they really helped with easing my stress. Maybe i'll end up getting some weekend work to cover it. Yeah, add more stress to ease more stress. That makes sense.

Now that i've thought about that though, I think my work benefits might cover some of the costs of massage therapy. I'll have to look into it.

My eating was so-so on the weekend. I did have some potato chips on Saturday night; the rest of the weekend was made up of healthy foods. Unfortunately, last night I had three dinners  two servings of chicken, noodles and broccoli, and a turkey and cheese sandwich on ezekiel bread. I should have just gone to bed, but I was reading a good book.

Which reminds me, 14 books read out of 36 total.

My Walking Challenge this week didn't go so well. My total so far is .25 miles  with one day to go which will consist of a massage and some quality Dog Time. I don't think i'll get any walking in today.

That's not to say I didn't get any exercise in though. Just not enough walking. Next week will hopefully be better.

Progress as of today: 11 lbs lost so far, only 9 lbs to go!

grannyannie on 10/17/2011:
It's a new week! I have faith you'll do great this week!

KayBee on 10/17/2011:
poor dog, I feel sorry for you guys... it's always so hard to say goodbye to our beloved ones, but that's just the way life goes. Taxes and death are certain... :-( I'm curious what 36 books you're talking about. Are these specific books or you just counted the books at home you haven't read yet?

glycrina on 10/17/2011:
My heart is with you Legs. It shows how much you love you your dog by being able to let him go when he is in such pain. If you can give yourself some healing time -- the massage sounds GREAT. I need to make an appointment. Hugs.

Umpqua on 10/17/2011:
You are doing just great considering your circumstances. Stay strong! xoxo

Supercheese on 10/17/2011:
poor doggy but everything happens for a reason right? I hope the massage makes you feel better :)

V on 10/17/2011:
:( I am so sorry..I know how hard it was to come to that decision.. Love you <3

legcramps - Friday Oct 14, 2011

Weight: 164.0

Oh, I am so damn happy it's Friday.

Dog has an eye infection now, and is refusing to eat even the cottage cheese I put in her dish. Yesterday, I tried beef, steak, chicken, more chicken, cottage cheese and finally... frozen yogurt. Yes, that's right. She ate the ice cream of course.

I don't know if I should call the vet for an antibiotic? What if she continues to refuse to eat?

She's already lost a kilogram of weight in the last few weeks.

What do you think? Should I get the antibiotic? I think i'll get the antibiotic. I don't know!

I didn't go to Zumba due to the many attempts to get food into Dog's mouth. It's upsetting and oh so exhausting.

Today I have to get the oil changed in my car, get them to check the tires, pick up gravy mixes to see if Dog will eat that, call the vet (maybe?yes?) to get antibiotics for Dog, go to a dog park meeting (yeah right, that might not happen) plus work a full day of work. I'm tired just looking at all that.

I need to walk. Tomorrow morning, man, that's what i'm doing. Rain or shine. I need to work out some emotions.

Progress as of today: 11 lbs lost so far, only 9 lbs to go!

getmebackto150 on 10/14/2011:
I think I would get the antibiotics... It can't HURT and it will at least make you feel better... Hope Dog eats for you and you have a nice weekend!

grannyannie on 10/14/2011:
Agree. Get antibiotics. Hope dog get betters soon. Sorry you missed Zumba.

hollybelle on 10/14/2011:
I agree, I think I'd get the antibiotic for her eye and talk to vet. Is she still getting up and down some?

legcramps - Thursday Oct 13, 2011

Weight: 164.0

I left work around 2:30 yesterday; I had cramping in my stomach and nausea. I think from the flu shot. So I went back to sleep when I got home, got up around 6:30 and then went back to sleep at 10:00. I feel better today. Hopefully i'll make it to Zumba tonight.

I had way too much to eat yesterday. Coffee, two pieces toast with pb and honey, chicken sandwich, two handfuls of almonds, two servings of chicken and macaroni salad, a cabbage roll, 1 bag fat free popcorn, frozen yogurt with blueberries and strawberries. Oh my God, that's ridiculous. 2,796 calories according to fitday. No wonder i'm not hungry this morning.

Plan for today: coffee, yogurt with banana and granola, chicken sandwich, yogurt again with a few almonds, 3.5 litres of water, macaroni salad with chicken, frozen yogurt with berries. That should earn me about 1,800 calories. That would be much better.

I'm back in a budget crunch this month. I accidentally spent over $160 on groceries last pay period. I didn't even eat out! I'm deliriously happy that tomorrow is payday but I really shouldn't get too excited because it'll all be gone to bills and other payments. I also need to get a tire patched or replaced, yay. I hope I have enough to feed myself otherwise i'll be visiting grandma and taking advantage of her home cooking more often in the next two weeks ;) My goal this week is to buy minimal staples and try to use up what I already have in the house. I noticed that my freezer is packed, so that might take a week or so to empty out, and I have a lot of canned food too. I don't know why I buy it when it just sits there uneaten.

Progress as of today: 11 lbs lost so far, only 9 lbs to go!

glycrina on 10/13/2011:
Hey legs. Hope today is a better day. I occassionally take an inventory of what is my pantry and freezer and decide what I need to get to make meals. Sometimes, I have to get creative. I have to go back on budget on myself. I am spending too much in general.

getmebackto150 on 10/13/2011:
I hear you on overspending on groceries... hubby and I just got our budget back under control today (pay day) after a LONG summer of overspending... Glad to hear you are feeling better today!

V on 10/13/2011:
I am so happy that you are feeling better today! i hope your evening of Zumba went well

legcramps - Wednesday Oct 12, 2011

Weight: 164.0

I got a flu shot yesterday at work, and when I got home I passed out on the couch. I didn't wake up until after 9pm, and then was sleeping again by 10pm. Slept right through the night. What's with all this sleeping?!!!

I am sure a lot of yesterday's issue had to do with the flu shot. Normally, it wipes me out.

So I didn't get much done yesterday ;)

I feel tired still, and I don't really have much to say. Or maybe I do and I can't think of what I want to say. At any rate, I think I'll sign off and get to work. Or go back home and sleep some more.

Progress as of today: 11 lbs lost so far, only 9 lbs to go!

getmebackto150 on 10/12/2011:
The flu shot does the same thing to me! By tomorrow hopefully you will be back to normal!!

sweetpea1977 on 10/12/2011:
I hope you get to feeling better soon!

V on 10/12/2011:
Aww man I hope life gets easier for you soon, stay strong! Love you

legcramps - Tuesday Oct 11, 2011

Weight: 164.0

11 books read out of 36 ;)

Hello Everyone! Hope you had a good Columbus Day in the US yesterday. I had Thanksgiving Day yesterday and with the extra Friday off, I had a four day weekend. I can safely say I caught up on a lot of sleep!

Friday - 4.65 mile walk; take nap; grocery shopping; visit family

Saturday - 3.84 mile walk; visit family; take nap

Sunday - clean house (finally); take nap; visit family; have family overnight

Monday - visit family; host friends

As you can see my weekend was filled with a lot of naps. They weren't very long, but they helped me get through the difficult moments with Mom. I've been feeling resentful of her actions towards me. I held all of that in this weekend, but it bothers me that I'm so angry with her because I want to move on from it. Family in general exhausts me. I have a hard time being around them for long periods of time; they are so outspoken that I simply sit there and listen and disappear into the colour of the living room wall. I'm not like them at all so I like to escape back home to give myself a break.

I also got some walking in! Woohoo! 8.49 miles. I’m very pleased with sending in this weekly total, and I’m confident that this number will only increase as the weeks go by.

Unfortunately, I also ate a lot of food. I realized this morning that I have a little bit of work ahead of me to undo the damage from the holiday weekend. My plan for today:

Mocha, coffee, bran muffin

Stuffed Zuchinni (no, I’m still not done it!)

Yogurt, almonds, Skinny B

4 litres water

Leftovers from holiday meals

Alright, off to work! Have a good week everyone!

Progress as of today: 11 lbs lost so far, only 9 lbs to go!

getmebackto150 on 10/11/2011:
great job on the 8+ miles of walking. I'm sorry things are so difficult with your mom right now and I hope they get better soon! Menu looks great for today!!

glycrina on 10/11/2011:
Our Thanksgiving is in November and I hope to be down 10 pounds by then . . . if for no other reason then to have some room to gain it back again. LOL.

Umpqua on 10/11/2011:
I'm glad you had a nice holiday weekend with lots of walking and napping!

grannyannie on 10/11/2011:
Well done on all the walking. Doing well on the books. :-)

sweetpea1977 on 10/11/2011:
Glad you got some sleep and look at that mileage your racking up!

Keeping ya in my thoughts. xo

moogy on 10/11/2011:
I haven't seen or spoken to my sisters or brother in donkey's years. Love them but don't like them much. Fortunately they live in another state. Just because they are family there is no law that says I have to stay in touch with them. My parents are dead so that makes life less complicated as well. I am writing this down so that you know there are better days ahead if you make choices that make you happy instead of other people:)

V on 10/11/2011:
Girl I have a friend in Baniff(anywhere near you?) That is a fitness trainer who also competes in fitness competitions..Anyhoo It was shocking at the number of naps she has taken over the holiday, it's the churducken(am I saying this right?) LOL If it is anything like the aftermath of sleepiness that Turkey gives you then I can see why so many naps are needed..hahaha Love you!!

Supercheese on 10/12/2011:
I take lots of naps too cause I sleep so poorly at night but you seem to need it with so much walking!! good job!

legcramps - Friday Oct 07, 2011

Weight: 164.0

Good Morning all :)

I have today off work, so when I woke up this morning I thought i'd get a start on this walking challenge with my cousin. I grabbed my Garmin and headed out for a nice long walk. Logged 4.65 miles towards my weekly total :) and just as I stepped back into the house, it started raining. What luck! Maybe things are starting to turn around for me?

Yesterday was the anniversary of my grandpa's death. He's been gone for two long years. It was the first thing to cross my mind when I woke up. I miss him so much.

I took umpqua's advice and had some yogurt with my morning anti-biotic. I noticed some slight nausea while I was walking, but nothing like the last two mornings - so thankful!

When I got home, I made myself an egg and turkey bacon bagel and had my morning coffee. Now I think I am going to read for a bit and then run some errands this afternoon. 10 books read so far!

Today I will remember that I have the strength to persevere.

Progress as of today: 11 lbs lost so far, only 9 lbs to go!

sweetpea1977 on 10/07/2011:
We love our Garmins. Our second one quit working a little while ago and we felt so lost without it. Anyway, we just pre-ordered a brand new very high end model for $400 off of Amazon and its scheduled to arrive some time next week. Its Christmas in October for hubby! :) In addition to using it for GPS, he will get free lifetime map and traffic updates as well as use it to listen to his audiobooks. He's so excited! Anyway, so glad you're able to map out your walks with it. Such a handy tool!

Death anniversaries are always difficult. Im keeping you in my thoughts today!

grannyannie on 10/07/2011:
Well done. Sounds like you had a great day. Love my Garmin as well. I understand about anniversaries as well.

Umpqua on 10/07/2011:
Great job on the walk and I'm glad your nausea lessened. Have a great weekend!

biscottibody59 on 10/08/2011:
RYC: Coffee's an issue with me--I'm up and down with it.

Hope you're having a good weekend!

V on 10/09/2011:
Thinking of you my friend! Sending lots of love your way

~WI~ on 10/10/2011:
Glad you are feeling better and that the yogurt worked! Good to get all that exercise physically and mentally, you are doing so awesome!

moogy on 10/10/2011:
Your day sounds really good so far. Even the remembering bit, I bet you remembered him with love. Yes, you are right you do have the strength to persevere. I am always amazed that somehow we manage to get through all the stuff that life throws at us:)

legcramps - Thursday Oct 06, 2011

Weight: 164.0

Was sick again this morning. Woke up around 6am and used the heating pad on my back until I started feeling better. No advil today. I refuse.

I've been taking anti-biotics for my tooth infection and it's finally starting to help. My tongue keeps wanting to move over the place where my tooth used to be, so i'm trying to be aware of that consciously so that I can stop myself when it happens. It feels good to feel better! Although, now I have this sinus cold i'm trying to keep away, and i've been sick for the last two mornings. Can't win for losing!

I slept in this morning so today i'm a mess: Wearing brown dress slacks and a grey top, no makeup, and my hair is still wet but I tried to style it as best I could. It's gonna be one of THOSE days. At least today I brought 1.5 litres of water with me and I plan to guzzle it through the day and get back on the water wagon!

My plan was to make pita pizzas yesterday for dinner, but i've been only able to pick at the stuffed zuchinni lately so i'd like to try and finish that off first before I make something else.

My cousin wants me to join her in a walking challenge, so I said I would. We are supposed to check in with each other once a week with our stats (mileage, time, etc.). It will run until the end of the year. I'm hoping this will help me to get back into running more often beause i've really been letting that slip away and this would give me a good base to start from.

Zumba tonight!

Progress as of today: 11 lbs lost so far, only 9 lbs to go!

Umpqua on 10/06/2011:
I wonder if the antibiotics are causing your tummy issues? They wreak havoc on my stomach. I'm only doing the TurboFire toning classes, the HIIT and Fire classes are way too aerobic for me, just not my thing. I love the toning using the resistance bands though, it's a way tougher workout than when I was using free weights. Feel better!

Umpqua on 10/06/2011:
Yogurt - even a couple of spoonfuls, will help. I always try to take it wiht antibiotics, the biggest benefit is preventing yeast infections (sorry to go there) but it should also help your tummy. I know you eat a lot of it already so it may not be applicable, but you could try taking it with the antibiotics.


grannyannie on 10/06/2011:
Hope you're feeling better soon. I get the sinus headaches sometimes. Hope you can handle the Zumba and have fun! Re jump rope - it's a great aerobic workout. I work in about 8 sets of 25 skips with my tae bo workout.

hackersdiet on 10/06/2011:
I love having a friend to keep me accountable. I feel like that is what DD is for me. Take care and get well soon, and don't feel too competititve with your cousin. Perhaps just say if you met your goal yes or no without details of how much exercise you did...Unless you are similar in fitness level and have similar goals too. Anyway, that sounds fun! I hope you feel well soon!

sweetpea1977 on 10/06/2011:
Ooh, a walking challenge! Sounds fun! I am willing to bet that you will win. :)

I hope you feel better soon!

Supercheese on 10/06/2011:
Oh yes it was scary but shes out of my life now!!! I hope you feel better :) How do you make your pita pizza cause that sounds interesting....Have fun at zumba!

glycrina on 10/06/2011:
thanks for validating my feelings.

V on 10/06/2011:
:) That would make me so happy if you did...If you love bootcamp, I know you will LOVE Turbo Fire <3 There are so many ways you can go about this... You could do Turbo prep before you jump into the regular class schedule or just jump right into it...There is the "new to class" options on all of the choreographed stuff to show you the tricks of how to get the most of the workout... Chalene's right hand girl Allie is the go to girl if you don't want to go as hard as the rest of the class..Trust when i say that as a gym rat myself i was a bit skeptical, but everytime I push play it is like a party that only the elite, fittest of the fit is invited to.. If you are up to the challenge, I guarantee you will NEVER get bored.. If you have more questions feel free to ask, and BTW I would be honored to be your Turbo coach

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